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Some points of Orthodox doctrine, please...

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zhilan

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Anyway, I'm struggling with the Orthodox take on divorce. Yes, it is true that Jesus said divorce is wrong except in the case of "porneia" (though there has been significant discussion over the centuries regarding what exactly porneia is). I can understand the rationalisation behind a wife leaving an abusive husband or a cheating husband.

But what if the couple just decides they don't want to be married anymore? What if they got married for the wrong reasons - like, they were so "in love" that they got caught up in the romanticism of it all and then realised there's no real solid foundaiton. THAT happens far more often than abuse or molestation or even adultery, I'd wager.

In that case they probably wouldn't grant a divorce. The Church has guidelines for what constitutes grounds for divorce. For example, I remember in a homily the priest talking about it once, he said that cheating or porn addiction or something like that would be considered cheating and thus could grant a divorce. I'm not sure about abuse. Of course, if you were married and divorced before becoming Orthodox that's a different matter and that sin will likely be considered wiped away in baptism.

Thanks also, for asking your questions here. I really apprecaite it. It's nice when people ask instead of just assuming!
 
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Gwendolyn

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In that case they probably wouldn't grant a divorce. The Church has guidelines for what constitutes grounds for divorce. For example, I remember in a homily the priest talking about it once, he said that cheating or porn addiction or something like that would be considered cheating and thus could grant a divorce. I'm not sure about abuse. Of course, if you were married and divorced before becoming Orthodox that's a different matter and that sin will likely be considered wiped away in baptism.

Thanks also, for asking your questions here. I really apprecaite it. It's nice when people ask instead of just assuming!

I prefer it here. You give honest answers... there's never a lot of confusion or accusation going on.

But what happens to the Sacrament itself? If a person is married in the Orthodox Church, and then divorces and remarries... the sacrament of marriage stays valid for both marriages? I'm having a difficulty with this because of the Catholic view. I need to think in your understanding here.

Like, for us, an annullment means that there were factors impeding the Sacrament being conferred - sometimes so serious that it turns out the Sacrament was not properly conferred at all. Just as you can't get baptised again, or chrismated again, or receive holy orders over again, you cannot receive the marriage sacrament again (assuming the sacrament was valid).

I'm used to the notion that once you are married, you are married for life. If your husband leaves you just because he doesn't want you anymore, that doesn't change the fact that you were validily, sacramentally married.

Sure, an annullment might just be a fancy way of allowing divorce. But it deals with the validity of a sacrament.

I guess I'm getting into sacramental theology here. I'm a bit out of my league because I'm not quite sure how to ask the question.
 
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Macarius

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Good morning, friends. We are having one of the usual discussions on OBOB and someone came up with these points on which our doctrines differ. Is this true, or how would you define these? Apologies if you find it put in a way that is offensive to you - no use changing the wording, you can read up the original on OBOB anyway!

Welcome to TAW! I appreciate your coming to ask us as opposed to taking what you heard at face value. I will do my best to answer your questions.

There are at least 3 areas where they have departed from this:

Not quite sure what "this" is - perhaps some context? It may be the teachings of the RCC, in which case (shrug).

The Immaculate Conception - there is a variety of teaching in the EO now - anywhere from Mary was immaculate her entire life, to Mary was a sinner until sometime before the annunciation, to Mary was a sinner until the annunciation, to Mary was a sinner until the birth of Christ to Mary was never immaculate.

There is, has always been, and always will be ONE teaching of the Orthodox Church on Mary regarding her holiness: she is Ever Virgin, All Holy, and the Mother of God. Those are the three ways we venerate her at every liturgy. All holy - free from sin. We do NOT, however, affirm that she was free from sin by necessity due to some unusual aspect of her birth (ie being born free from original sin).

Mary, had Christ not died on the cross and risen from the dead, would have died the same death as everyone else prior to Christ. We still affirm her bodily death as well (calling our feast "Dormition of the Theotokos" as opposed to "Assumption") though the bodily assumption of Mary is a permissable doctrine for an Orthodox Christian.

Mary NEEDED Christ to save her. To affirm the immaculate conception is to say that the cross was unncessary for her human condition - which is to say she was a totally different type of human than the rest of us. While God is certanily capable of that, it defeats much of her value to us - namely as the supreme example of a Christian life and the supreme hope of the fate of all Christians, the first of the Saints and the Queen of Heaven.

Additionally, if Mary had to be immaculate for Christ to be born free from original sin (an argument often forwarded by RCC apologists) then it would follow that her parents had to be born immaculately as well, and so on and so forth back to Adam and Eve, meaning original sin wouldn't have existed at all... It just doesn't make sense to us.

So we affirm that Mary, by the free will God gave her, in so much as it is possible for a human being (and to the furthest extent possible for a human being) remained voluntarily free from sin throughout her life. Thus she is called "All Holy."

This represents a marked change in the teaching of the EO regarding Mary and occured soon after the Reformatiuon and was in fact influenced by reformation theology.

Nope... bold faced untruth. I'd like to see the evidence that we believed Mary to be "born immaculately and free from the stain of original sin as Augustine viewed it" prior to the Reformation. Regardless - it has NEVER been proclaimed dogmatically, and isn't in the liturgies (nor in any liturgy I'm aware of). It isn't in our icons, and I've never read a church father who comments on it (though my comprehensiveness declines sharply after Constantine... I'm more familiar with 1st - 3rd centuries).

So, so far as I'm aware, this statement is simply false. We never believed in the immaculate conception as the RCC professes it. I'm not sure when it first showed up in the West, but I'd be curious.

Remarriage - though it is discouraged, they allow for remarriage even though it might result in condoning an adulterous relationship - they make no attempt at discerning if the previous marriage was sacramentally valid. It is considered a penitential marriage, rather than a sacramentally valid marriage that can never be put assunder.

This started in the middle of the 1st milleneium when the Orthodox Church turned their authority over the insitution of marriage to the Emperor. There was only one reason why someone could be remarried then and it was up to the Emperor to grant it. Then the next century saw the reasons evolve into 3, then 10 at the beginning of last century, and the last time I looked, it was about 20.

Christ Himself allows for divorce in Matthew. So we're starting off on decent ground here.

"Allows for" is also a limited term. We don't "condone" it and we don't "encourage it." We don't consider it to be moral or ethical to get a divorce, just like, in an ideal world, confession wouldn't exist because we wouldn't sin.

But the simple fact is that we live in a fallen world. There are marriages which ARE valid sacramentally, but fail because of the fallenness of human beings. That doesn't invalidate them sacramentally. Allowing a second, penitential marriage is consistent with the principles of Christ's mercy even as confession and allowing apostates back into the Church is consistent with Christ's mercy.

Suffice it to say, we are consistent with the Apostolic Church in calling divorce and re-marriage immoral (hence the penitential character of a marriage service for a second marriage) and are consistent with those principles when, pastorally speaking, facing a real world situation of a failed marriage.

Contraception: This was a doctrine the EO stood firmly with us on until a few decades ago. At that point, it was firm EO teaching that artificial contraception was absolutely forbidden. Then things changed over the space of a decade, and now it is permitted with the permission of the priest.

Well, this one is undecided for a couple of key reasons. First, birth control in its contemporary form is extremely new, second, the pastoral concerns have changed. It isn't a decided issue. Some priests and bishops allow it, others do not. The monastics tend to be against it, but the parish priests more or less ok with it in limited forms and only on a temporary basis (that is, while a young couple gains financial stability and prepares a proper home in which to raise a child). Long term intentional childlessness (including "natural family planning") is considered self-centered and contrary to the purpose of marriage.

If it becomes a huge issue, it may take an ecumenical council to write canon law on the issue. I, for one, am not settled one way or the other. I think most of the Catholic arguments against it fail, but I do think there are arguments which can be made directly against ANY intentional childlessness in marriage, and I sympathize with the RCC position even as I disagree with it... It's a comlicated issue.

Give the EO some time and eventually, a clear direction will be reached. This is part of that whole "we make decisions in an unsystematic / organic way [bottom up] rather than the more organized [top down] model of the RCC." That has its benefits (stability of doctrine and practice, not systematizing the Holy Spirit, no infallibility claims systematic sense) and its drawbacks (takes a lot longer, less understandable to outsiders, etc).

We trust the Holy Spirit to guide His Church.

unquote

Thanks in advance! I am praying to the Holy Spirit that we do not get into a fight about this. I for one, and many others on OBOB, would love to come to a good understanding of these points, one that sheds a positive light on you (but not a negative one on us either, please. Remember, it's our Holy Week this week!)
[/QUOTE]

God be with you! Have a blessed Easter/Pascha/Resurrection!!

In Christ,
Macarius
 
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zhilan

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I prefer it here. You give honest answers... there's never a lot of confusion or accusation going on.

But what happens to the Sacrament itself? If a person is married in the Orthodox Church, and then divorces and remarries... the sacrament of marriage stays valid for both marriages? I'm having a difficulty with this because of the Catholic view. I need to think in your understanding here.

Like, for us, an annullment means that there were factors impeding the Sacrament being conferred - sometimes so serious that it turns out the Sacrament was not properly conferred at all. Just as you can't get baptised again, or chrismated again, or receive holy orders over again, you cannot receive the marriage sacrament again (assuming the sacrament was valid).

I'm used to the notion that once you are married, you are married for life. If your husband leaves you just because he doesn't want you anymore, that doesn't change the fact that you were validily, sacramentally married.

Sure, an annullment might just be a fancy way of allowing divorce. But it deals with the validity of a sacrament.

I guess I'm getting into sacramental theology here. I'm a bit out of my league because I'm not quite sure how to ask the question.

Great question! I think this speaks to one of our big differences in the way we view things. Nothing happens to the sacrament, but it comes from a trusting in God's mercy (and that it is within the understanding of what Christ said). The second marriage, if there is one, is not a joyful ceremony, but is asking for God's mercy and the understanding that we are subject to human weakness.

Here's a question I always had about annulments - how is it that sometimes a sacrament doesn't take place, and why does that only happen with marriage? Why doesn't it every turn out that a baptism didn't really happen or an ordination or a Confirmation? Why is it only marriage? And why does it only turn out that way when the marriage fails (and when the marriage fails why does it almost always turn out that the sacrament "didn't happen"?). Surly, based on the criteria for annulment, there are some marriages that work out where it must not have actually happened either. For example, one grounds for annulment is if one or both couples is not really open to life. Well, there are couples married in the Catholic Church who are not open to life but they aren't divorced - so why isn't the church going to them to tell them that even though they aren't divorced, their sacrament didn't really happen?

To be totally honest with you, both Churches' positions on divorce bother me a bit.

Essentially both churches allow divorce, they both just have ways of getting around it. I don't know that I agree with either to be honest and if my marriage were ever to fail, I don't think I could bring myself to remarry (perhaps that's from my own sin of not trusting), but at least I feel like the Orthodox Church is a little more honest about it.
 
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Matrona

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But what if the couple just decides they don't want to be married anymore? What if they got married for the wrong reasons - like, they were so "in love" that they got caught up in the romanticism of it all and then realised there's no real solid foundaiton. THAT happens far more often than abuse or molestation or even adultery, I'd wager.

This is why Orthodox couples get couples counseling with their priest well ahead of a marriage taking place. And they cannot ask for a divorce and just automatically get it, either.

Anyway, an Orthodox couple that finds their marriage to be something like that gets exteeeeeeeeeeeensive counseling. They both have to really try to make it work - and working out their issues, they can sometimes get what wasn't there in the first place.

Now, if the counseling fails, with both spouses really trying to make it work, and the priest agrees that the salvation of each of the spouses would be best served if they dissolved the marriage, that's when a divorce would be possible.
 
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zhilan

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Mary NEEDED Christ to save her. To affirm the immaculate conception is to say that the cross was unncessary for her human condition - which is to say she was a totally different type of human than the rest of us. While God is certanily capable of that, it defeats much of her value to us - namely as the supreme example of a Christian life and the supreme hope of the fate of all Christians, the first of the Saints and the Queen of Heaven.

I just want to quote this again because I think this really gets to the heart of the matter. Very well said!
 
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zhilan

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I want to echo what matriona said about what's best for the salvation of the souls.

A lot of people think it's too harsh that divorced couples are generally penanced for a year after a divorce, but this is for their souls. We learn that we are not to come to the Eucharist with hate in our hearts. Obviously after a divorced it's going to take a long time for you to sort out to where you can truly see your ex as a brother or sister in Christ and it is with this understanding that the Church penances us - not for punishment but for the good of our soul.
 
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Rowan

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Mary NEEDED Christ to save her. To affirm the immaculate conception is to say that the cross was unncessary for her human condition...

I'd disagree with that part. Catholics would say that she was saved by the cross through Christ, just when she was conceived.
 
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Xpycoctomos

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Veritas,

It might help to consider that the Orthodox Church views what the sacrament of marriage is as very differently. I would suggest that how we view that bond, what it is and its substance is perhaps fundamentally different.

In a nutshell, the Catholic CHurch views it as a contract that cannot be broken except by death. Hense the need for the concept of the annulment.

The Orthodox views marriage as a bond in Christ that shall not be broken... but certain can be. Some Orthdoox writer said that marriage is a thread dangling by the mouth of God. EIther one can choose to cut that thread. It is a daily choice in marriage to strengthen that thread or fray it, until it breaks. That is a choice. I can deny my baptism. Don't get me wrong, the sacrament was very real, and breaking one is a huge deal and needs serious spiritual counseling if one occurs. The first step is to try to repair it. If this cannot happen becuase of the weakness or frailness of one or both of them, then the Church recognizes that the couple is divorced and gives them (hopefully) the appropriate penance for two reasons 1) so that they can realize that this is serious and 2) so they can heal. Even if it wasn't the woman's fault, a serious spiritual harm has been done, so penance (although perhaps in a lesser form) is still given, not to make the person feel guilty, but in order to speed the recovery of her soul from something that might be likened to a heart attack (regardless of whether it was caused by life-style choices or genetics, one must still go through pain and certain prescriptions in order to recover).

There is no such thing as a marriage that never happened in the Orthodox Church (as far as I can tell, although possibly there are some obscure historical circumstances that lead to western-like anullments in the Church, but these are aborations rather than examples of good Orthodox praxis).

Marriage is not some arbitrary contract that we are part of because of the special ceremony we went through 12 years ago. It's a constant choice through the hearts and actions of both people.

The Church doesn't divorce people anymore than she creates dogmas. She recognizes divorces that have already occured and that are (Becuase of our human frailty) irreparable.

To be sure, it is entirely possible that in certain parishes, diocese, depending on the preist, the culture and/or the bishop, divorce may be taken as lightly as in some mainstream Protestant Churches (ie it's seen as very sad, but given up on very easily and/or with very few consequence (penances) given afterward) but that is abuse due to our human weakness and laziness and priests and bishops are only human too (I don't mean that at all as an excuse but as a realistic observation and explanation). But I can hardly see how going in the extreme opposite direction of saying that a marriage is some draconian contract that depends nothing on the hearts and actions of both individuals involved would be any holier. The former is to be an irresponsible steward of God's gift of marriage and the latter loses sight of what marriage really is.

I just want to add, that despite these fundamental differences, I do not mean to suggest that Catholic marriage itself is invalid or any less a sacrament but rather that the understanding is confused or at least very extreme.

Hopefully that helped a bit.

GOd bless,

Xpy
 
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MariaRegina

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Re: Blessings

Blessings are permissions.

If Orthodox Christians want to sing in the choir, they must first obtain the blessing of their priest and then the choir director.

When I was a Catholic, we did not have to obtain the permission (blessing) from the priest before joining the choir. However, if a Catholic wanted to be a Eucharistic Minister, then they would have to obtain the permission of the priest and a blessing from the Bishop, right?

When a couple approaches their Orthodox Priest to set a date for the marriage, the priest must obtain permission from the Bishop. If the bishop withholds his permission, a blessing is not granted. On the west coast, I know of two occasions recently where the Bishop did not grant a blessing for a marriage. One was a request for a second marriage, and the other was a request for a first marriage. The bishop felt that there were serious and compelling reasons for not allowing the marriage. In one case, the woman had been repeatedly abused by men and was considered mentally unstable.

When I was a Catholic, my husband and I went to the Catholic Engaged Encounter. There the Catholic Priest told everyone not to be surprised if some couples left because the questions we were going to discuss required deep reflection, and some couples would discover irreconcilable differences. In that case, it would be better to end the engagement immediately, however embarrassing that would be at the time.

It is the same within Orthodoxy. Sometimes the priest and bishop can see difficulties that the couple may not recognize because they may be in a state of infatuation where they are in denial.

Frankly, I am glad that the Bishop has the honesty to call a spade a spade and not give his blessing.
 
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vanshan

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One apparent difference between our view and the Roman Catholic view of marriage is how legalistically this holy mystery is viewed. The Orthodox Church resists divorce, and if it is allowed it's done with the expectation of penitence on the part of the divorcing individuals, but pastoral concern does allow for it. To me it seems that this mercy reflects the same mercy Christ demonstrates in scripture. Due to the hardness of man's heart divorce may be allowed in some cases, but it's never viewed as a good thing. The Roman Catholic practice of trying to find loopholes to annul marriages, or to view the sacrament as legally binding and unable to be broken, therefore other marriages impossible to be performed, shows a lack of mercy for the weakness of mankind. No mercy is shown to sinners if that hard line is taken. It's like kicking sand in the face of sinners already suffering through a difficult situation. I think the Orthdox position is maintains the proper balance of resistance to divorce, but mercy in cases where reconciliation is not possible due to weakness.

Basil
 
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zhilan

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I also still don't get how it is that a sacrament could someone sometimes "not happen." It seems like it would make God more like a magician who must follow a certain formula or His hands are tied. And do other sacraments sometimes "not happen" and then when you're married should you always worry that maybe your sacrament "didn't happen" and you are actually just living in sin?
 
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fuerein

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I also still don't get how it is that a sacrament could someone sometimes "not happen." It seems like it would make God more like a magician who must follow a certain formula or His hands are tied. And do other sacraments sometimes "not happen" and then when you're married should you always worry that maybe your sacrament "didn't happen" and you are actually just living in sin?
Personally it has made me wonder if in Catholic eyes any of the other Sacraments could be deemed as never having occured because there was something 'wrong'. What? Thought you were baptized eh? Sorry, ruling just came down, you're no longer baptized. An actually we've also decided you never really were baptized at all.

And if not, what makes the sacrament of marriage inherently different from all the rest.
 
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zhilan

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Personally it has made me wonder if in Catholic eyes any of the other Sacraments could be deemed as never having occured because there was something 'wrong'. What? Thought you were baptized eh? Sorry, ruling just came down, you're no longer baptized. An actually we've also decided you never really were baptized at all.

And if not, what makes the sacrament of marriage inherently different from all the rest.
Exactly. Or with all the crazy priests they have, why aren't they going to some of them and concluding that sacrament didn't happen??

Certainly if simply planning to use birth control or being too young before marriage is enough to make the sacrament not happen, one would think that molesting little boys would most certainly prevent it from happening...and yet that never seems to happen. It makes you wonder why God works in such a strange and arbitrary way...
 
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vanshan

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Wow. Taken to it's logical conclusion, that's absurd.

Has the RCC stated that planning to use birth control makes a marriage null and void, because from other articles I've read about American Roman Catholics is that most of them use birth control in defiance of the Church's position on it.


Basil
 
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Globalnomad

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Actually, it CAN happen to any Sacrament - (not so easily to Baptism, since that can be administered by anyone with the right intention, even a non-Christian!) - but we have a theological explanation to cover such cases, so that no-one needs ot worry. Why don't you go ask on OBOB? There are people who know this far better than me.
 
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Macarius

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Actually, it CAN happen to any Sacrament - (not so easily to Baptism, since that can be administered by anyone with the right intention, even a non-Christian!) - but we have a theological explanation to cover such cases, so that no-one needs ot worry. Why don't you go ask on OBOB? There are people who know this far better than me.
That's Donatism!!

A sacrament is not made invalid by ANY attitudes nor behaviors of the officiating priest.

Sacraments are actions of GOD. They are irrevocable. We may deny the grace they confer; we may abuse them - and that sin will be called to account in judgment - but the quality of the elements and the person officiating (beyond that person's being in communion with the Apostolic Church and having ordination to perform sacraments) is NOT relevant to the grace being FULLY GIVEN in the first place.

Please explain yourself! This sounds like heresy to me, and I don't want to believe that.

(Incidently - we were posting this here because the OP was asking a question apart from OBOB.)

With hope,
Macarius
 
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MariaRegina

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Exactly. Or with all the crazy priests they have, why aren't they going to some of them and concluding that sacrament didn't happen??

Certainly if simply planning to use birth control or being too young before marriage is enough to make the sacrament not happen, one would think that molesting little boys would most certainly prevent it from happening...and yet that never seems to happen. It makes you wonder why God works in such a strange and arbitrary way...

In Catholicism, the couple serves as the minister of the sacrament when they say their vows to each other. Therefore, the intention of the couple is important, not the intention or disposition of the priest.

In Eastern Catholicism and in Orthodoxy, the Priest serves as the minister and God joins the couple together. There are no shared vows as in Catholicism, and neither do the couples make a commitment "until death do us part."

In Orthodoxy, the marriage bond is eternal. Incidentally, that does not imply that couples will be having sex in heaven. Sex in heaven is an islamic idea.
 
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