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so angry

X-Ray

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ive been a christian most of my life, but after i started asking questions about the bible and god, ive fallen away, and only feel resentment and anger toward god and christians. i have so many questions, and no answers. dont even know why im on here, except to find out those answers, since god isnt kind enough to answer a few simple questions, even though i feel my soul is in the balance. help if you want, or just leave me here to rot, like i feel god did. or just ban me, you can do that too
 

Archie the Preacher

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Let me ask you a serious question X. Do you really want answers, or are you just wanting to justify your own choice to ignore God?

Worded alternatively, are you willing (or even able) to admit your own errors, see where you missed the answers and correct your thinking?

I'll be happy to fight this out with you and your 'demons' (or whatevers), but I've met enough who simply want to waste every else's time.
 
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newlightseven

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You can't let anger keep you away from God. It is better to be with God and angry and not understand than to not be with him at all. None of us truly understand it all so you are not alone. We are in this together my friend.
 
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Jeshu

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The problem is you got the wrong god in mind as God. God is not like us this is why we have to loose ourselves to be able to find Him. You have not lost yourself but are holding onto self and from that perspective are in an impossible position to find Him.

God is truthful love have you explored this avenue? Or have you been baited by religious dogmas, values and morals to hem you in and tie you down with and that is why you turned Him your back?

So I recommend you first get rid of how you think god is and find true God firstly. Now our Lord Jesus told us if you see Me than you see the Father. So simply look at Him hanging on the Cross spilling His life blood for yours while you don't give an it and are cold heartedly looking on. No wonder you are lost to where you want to go and what you want to do - that is the truth of your existence my dear straying brother life without God is not worth living more often than not end always ends in the grave below in more than one way.

Choose to love God and neighbour and see what happens to all your pressing questions they will disappear as snow before the Sun, honestly true, God will answer them all and so much more!!!

An invitation to The Chosen.

God's Love will not take or will
you to conform to rules or demand
which imprison, enslave, burn or kill you.

God's Love will not pervert what's Good
The Lord loves truthfully Wise and Good.
True Love was, is and always will be Good!

In God's Love you are free to be right!
In His love everything is good proper and kind.
He loves all who love good and true to rule!

His Love is caring, providing, and sharing.
His Love always enjoys and protects good life.
His love rules even when bad life has being in us!

Hear Jesus call - 'Come join up with us all!
Leave whatever ties you down and be free
loving good life with all God's own to be.'

To the rest in your heart God's asks
how long will you tarry in the darkness?
Please leave such bad existence within.

For life must not, no never should, or would, or could,
be forceful, rude, prideful, arrogant, selfish, lustful
or otherwise be untrue to God's loving truth.

Neither should life be hurting or ill,
hungry, oppressed, despised, hated
or otherwise have existence in wrong.

Please hand your Bad Life over to Jesus
Humbly ask for His Good Life back in return
and go love God, self and neighbour with Joy.

The Church knows that Jesus is coming soon
All bad life will be our shameful past then,
so please leave your bad life while you can!

Love
 
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X-Ray

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i guess i have just lost faith in what the church or christians in general know. i was raised in the church my whole life, so i never had "that moment" where you just want to dedicate your whole life to god. its makes it harder as well because ive been to MANY churches and have heard stuff along the lines "you have to dedicate your every waking second to god" or "good people cant do good things if their not christians". so to answer your question, yes, i want to fight, but not to waste anybodys precious time. besides, i dont even think you can comprehend what i feel. imagine waking up in the morning knowing for certain that your going to hell to rot. also imagine going to church but the whole time thinking up ways you want to end your life, also knowing u will go to hell to rot. i DESPERATELY want my faith restored, but the anger and hatred isnt going to just vanish. i need my questions answered. i know u might read that line and do the whole christian quote thing, "we dont know everything, we just need to trust in god." that helps nobody. help if u can, or dont. ur call
 
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John Hyperspace

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ive been a christian most of my life, but after i started asking questions about the bible and god, ive fallen away, and only feel resentment and anger toward god and christians. i have so many questions, and no answers. dont even know why im on here, except to find out those answers, since god isnt kind enough to answer a few simple questions, even though i feel my soul is in the balance. help if you want, or just leave me here to rot, like i feel god did. or just ban me, you can do that too

What are your questions?
 
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Sola1517

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ive been a christian most of my life, but after i started asking questions about the bible and god, ive fallen away, and only feel resentment and anger toward god and christians. i have so many questions, and no answers. dont even know why im on here, except to find out those answers, since god isnt kind enough to answer a few simple questions, even though i feel my soul is in the balance. help if you want, or just leave me here to rot, like i feel god did. or just ban me, you can do that too
i guess i have just lost faith in what the church or christians in general know. i was raised in the church my whole life, so i never had "that moment" where you just want to dedicate your whole life to god. its makes it harder as well because ive been to MANY churches and have heard stuff along the lines "you have to dedicate your every waking second to god" or "good people cant do good things if their not christians". so to answer your question, yes, i want to fight, but not to waste anybodys precious time. besides, i dont even think you can comprehend what i feel. imagine waking up in the morning knowing for certain that your going to hell to rot. also imagine going to church but the whole time thinking up ways you want to end your life, also knowing u will go to hell to rot. i DESPERATELY want my faith restored, but the anger and hatred isnt going to just vanish. i need my questions answered. i know u might read that line and do the whole christian quote thing, "we dont know everything, we just need to trust in god." that helps nobody. help if u can, or dont. ur call
What is/are your questions?
 
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Jeshu

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i guess i have just lost faith in what the church or christians in general know. i was raised in the church my whole life, so i never had "that moment" where you just want to dedicate your whole life to god. its makes it harder as well because ive been to MANY churches and have heard stuff along the lines "you have to dedicate your every waking second to god" or "good people cant do good things if their not christians". so to answer your question, yes, i want to fight, but not to waste anybodys precious time. besides, i dont even think you can comprehend what i feel. imagine waking up in the morning knowing for certain that your going to hell to rot. also imagine going to church but the whole time thinking up ways you want to end your life, also knowing u will go to hell to rot. i DESPERATELY want my faith restored, but the anger and hatred isnt going to just vanish. i need my questions answered. i know u might read that line and do the whole christian quote thing, "we dont know everything, we just need to trust in god." that helps nobody. help if u can, or dont. ur call

I know very well how you feel I have feared going to hell for many, may years. Like I said it is about getting rid of the impostor and finding true God. And yes I went shopping as well and been all over the place theologically though I like the biblical outlook the best. I only adhere to what it says in the bible not to what religion teaches for that didn't help me, or you, or anyone, one bit.

It is great not to have to fear God any more but to be able to love Him and to see Him work with His loving truth in my heart and change me into whom I have always wanted to be. God is good let me assure you and well worth serving.

Be blessed in your endeavors finding Him.

Twice Blinded

What destroyer, where would he be?
The deadly snake bite I didn't see!
Still part of myself was dragged away,
held captive there by wicked sway,
all the lies sown in my soul,
day by day taking control,
feeding my life lies and misery,
my good times became history.

Bringing thoughts and feelings around,
which are in no way sound,
rather inner kings cruel and strong,
those worldly ways so very wrong,
raising Babylon in all her might,
holding me captive in my fright,
denying grace to rule my ways,
mocking God in His face.

Horse hooves trampling my soul,
grass-hoppers devouring all,
scorpion stings stinging,
famine upon famine bringing,
brimstone burn everything to ash,
massive hailstones me to smash,
the darkness ever growing close,
for the goats got me by the nose.

So working for another's bread,
God's loving truth I forget,
thinking my world would always stink,
driving my good life to the brink,
yet there at the bottom of my might,
I finally began to see the light..,
..Jesus, whom I bring so much grief,
when I have that liar as my chief!

And so The Truth did shine on me!
His Spirit alive in my heart to see!
Oh what blinding light I saw there?
God's goodness displayed everywhere!
His love washing me white as snow!
His loving truth inside my life to flow!
Oh Lamb of God forever to be praised!
For from the dead I have been raised!
 
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X-Ray

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why are we here. not christians in general, but the human race. why did he start again. the bible says that he just wanted to make us, but he already failed, didnt he? we already know of one other civilization that he created, what we commonly refer to as 'angels'. the bible says how that turned out. about thirty three percent of the entire race started a coup against their leader, who they knew personally. now, god had already created adam and eve, but he had to have seen the so called coup coming. so what was his answer to this? make a completely NEW race, but make them (1. less powerful than the previous race, and (2. isolate them on a rock in the middle of black nothingness. and who knows how many other civilizations he had created before us. i know this is theory, but u cant possibly expect me to believe that the angels and humans are the first two things he created, the ETERNAL god. thats ridiculous. u also cant expect me to believe that after all of is little followers float up to heavan he'll stop completely. this is just ONE of the many things floating around in my little head, and not even the biggest thing i have against him
 
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grandvizier1006

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why are we here. not christians in general, but the human race. why did he start again. the bible says that he just wanted to make us, but he already failed, didnt he? we already know of one other civilization that he created, what we commonly refer to as 'angels'. the bible says how that turned out. about thirty three percent of the entire race started a coup against their leader, who they knew personally. now, god had already created adam and eve, but he had to have seen the so called coup coming. so what was his answer to this? make a completely NEW race, but make them (1. less powerful than the previous race, and (2. isolate them on a rock in the middle of black nothingness. and who knows how many other civilizations he had created before us. i know this is theory, but u cant possibly expect me to believe that the angels and humans are the first two things he created, the ETERNAL god. thats ridiculous. u also cant expect me to believe that after all of is little followers float up to heavan he'll stop completely. this is just ONE of the many things floating around in my little head, and not even the biggest thing i have against him
First off, there's nothing that suggests God made Angels as a prototype of humanity. Angels, originally, were sinless but not divine. They serve as God's messengers. They were powerful enough to try and rise up against God, but in no way able to match or defeat Him, hence why Satan failed. Him creating humans was an event separate from creating Angels, assuming that they weren't there from the beginning of time.

Why was humanity weaker? Humanity itself is certainly not all that weak. We are only "a little lower" than the Angels, not vastly inferior. But I believe the reason was because God wanted to create a race that would genuinely love Him. His Angels are obedient, but it simply May that they are designed that way. Humanity was given an opportunity to have free will. The Fall brought sin, but it also brought about a long period of time in which humanity experienced separation, then reunion thanks to Jesus Christ. It's easy to love someone when they're with you. But if you are separate from them, and conflict arises, then that love is so much greater when or if you finally reunite.

Life, for each of us, mirrors that journey humanity takes in the Bible. Happy innocence, a loss of that innocence, pain, a struggle to reconnect with God, and finally, someone who helps us appears and gives us a way to set things right by doing it himself. As humans, we can't endure God's punishments or love Him (and by extension obey Him) as well as we should, so He sent Jesus to do all of that for us.

It seems cruel sometimes. It seems like God is like a cosmic abuser or a narcissist, letting us be hurt until we return to Him. But we're the ones who hurt ourselves. We run away and we separate from Him. It's so much easier to blame God, but in doing that we deny our own wrongdoings and become arrogant. Think of the prodigal son. He left his father and wasted his inheritance. That son represents us. We squander God's gifts and spurn his love because we won't take time to understand Him.mwe think it would be better if we went our own way. But really, we all want someone to depend on, to trust, to love. And if we love that person, we'll obey Him.

And the cray thing is, no matter how much we question God or think of him as abusive or cruel, he forgives us. He does not punish us for leaving Him, we do that to ourselves. He will never stop loving us no matter how much we refuse to understand him.

Sorry if that message was long, but I hope it helped.
 
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X-Ray

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i read what u said, grandvizier1006, and i acknowledge that angels werent prototypes of humanity, even though i never said they were, just that they were first. also, im pretty sure that they are a little bit more powerful than we are. they are interdimensional beings. u also say that they were created to be obedient, but yet they still fall, like humanity. one more thing that u said, at the end of your message, was that no matter how much we scorn god, he lets us come back.... "For it is impossible, in the case of those who have once been enlightened, who have tasted the heavenly gift, and have shared in the Holy Spirit, and have tasted the goodness of the word of God and the powers of the age to come, and then have fallen away, to restore them again to repentance, since they are crucifying once again the Son of God to their own harm and holding him up to contempt." Hebrews 6: 4-6. look it up. ill admit, when i was looking stuff like this up, i thought i had hope, but that hope is gone, hence my dilema. now u can go and say that i took that outta context, and maybe i did, but it still wouldnt help. still, i appreciate you ACTUALLY replying, because i thought nobody would have the courage to do so.
 
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Jeshu

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why are we here. not christians in general, but the human race. why did he start again. the bible says that he just wanted to make us, but he already failed, didnt he? we already know of one other civilization that he created, what we commonly refer to as 'angels'. the bible says how that turned out. about thirty three percent of the entire race started a coup against their leader, who they knew personally. now, god had already created adam and eve, but he had to have seen the so called coup coming. so what was his answer to this? make a completely NEW race, but make them (1. less powerful than the previous race, and (2. isolate them on a rock in the middle of black nothingness. and who knows how many other civilizations he had created before us. i know this is theory, but u cant possibly expect me to believe that the angels and humans are the first two things he created, the ETERNAL god. thats ridiculous. u also cant expect me to believe that after all of is little followers float up to heavan he'll stop completely. this is just ONE of the many things floating around in my little head, and not even the biggest thing i have against him

See your problem is that your god is all speculation and no demonstration. All the charges you bring up against true God are way of the point and don't even address the issue that needs to be addressed. Why should I give a hoot about if God did or did not create more life than He shares with us? He is The Creator. Any one who can Create something so spectacular as just one living Creature is highly exulted above what He created surely you understand that principle just by the demonstration of His power to Create something as beautiful as a living being.

What have you created however? You have created a barrage of suck out of the thumb theories and put them between you and your creator and then claim your creator is bad for not taking your barrage of lies out of the way. The issue here is truthfulness my dear friend, not heeding that liar in your head confusing you and creating only darkness without lights for surely you know from Creation around you that is not how you create a life sustainable reality - just empty nothingness build by dark matter a mere vacuum really full of black holes, I guess you have already tumbled down a long way down from were you have fallen?

Jesus is the Name above all names. It is He who demonstrates God to us. Now would you charge Jesus with all the 'sins' you charge your Creator with, or do you see someone completely different. A gentle, loving, caring, nurturing, self denying, humble and truly honest person to see.

When I see Jesus then I see God and I think wow He spins me out completely. What A God we serve!!! Contrary to the idol of destruction you have in mind, He is completely self denying to the point where He lies down His life so I can have mine back even though I squandered my good life completely and hurt Him HELL He still loves me unconditionally and truthfully now this is the God I know, love and serve but that impostor you keep hammering on about I have never seen on Heaven's throne Revelation 4 has so much more to say about all that.

I suggest you eat a bit of humble pie my friend and fall on your knees and repent for raising your voice up high. Why should your lying speculation about God be true in any way whatsoever? You show me all the good he has brought you and then we talk. As it is, your god is an abomination, and I would run as fast as I can away from thinking like that about your Creator, for it will end up getting very hot down there, as I think you are already finding out bit by bit.

For the truth is our God is a consuming fire! His love is so good that if you ever tasted only one sip of that you gladly lay down your lying reality and die to all that just to be with Him in that part of yourself, for His love is FAR, FAR, FAR better than life! Now before you charge God with making hell, please understand that God didn't make hell, we make our own!!! It is God who wants to save us from there!!!

So please repent of all your questions and quieten your soul as you would a fussy child and humble kneel down before Him and ask Him to please reveal His light in Jesus Name and then await in faith and with eager expectation upon His answer. It took me 7 years to just understand what He all told me that first time, that is how much His light revealed to me in one instant - 7 x brighter than normal, when I did that. My pit was deep, like yours is right now, let me assure you yet His light found me and got me out, be of very good courage.

Oh and let me give you one other warning about having such blasphemous thoughts about God all the time - don't go beyond Scripture, like you do all the time right now speculating as you do! Stay in God's revealed truths and don't wander away from them. God didn't leave us His Word for nothing, so use it exclusively along with Creation, this includes yourself as well, to find Him, nothing more is needed.

I'll give you a hint. He is your good life, the life you lost heeding the lies you have, so loose your bad life and you'll find Him underneath it all. Happy worming around down there - and mean that - worming around is one of the best ways to find humility for without humility you will ever find God.

Peace.

(Please eat a bit of true God you desperately need His Bread!)

Revelation 4
After this I looked, and there before me was a door standing open in heaven. And the voice I had first heard speaking to me like a trumpet said, “Come up here, and I will show you what must take place after this.” At once I was in the Spirit, and there before me was a throne in heaven with someone sitting on it. And the one who sat there had the appearance of jasper and ruby. A rainbow that shone like an emerald encircled the throne. Surrounding the throne were twenty-four other thrones, and seated on them were twenty-four elders. They were dressed in white and had crowns of gold on their heads. From the throne came flashes of lightning, rumblings and peals of thunder. In front of the throne, seven lamps were blazing. These are the seven spirits of God. Also in front of the throne there was what looked like a sea of glass, clear as crystal.

In the center, around the throne, were four living creatures, and they were covered with eyes, in front and in back. The first living creature was like a lion, the second was like an ox, the third had a face like a man, the fourth was like a flying eagle. Each of the four living creatures had six wings and was covered with eyes all around, even under its wings. Day and night they never stop saying:

“‘Holy, holy, holy

is the Lord God Almighty,

who was, and is, and is to come.”


Whenever the living creatures give glory, honor and thanks to him who sits on the throne and who lives for ever and ever, the twenty-four elders fall down before him who sits on the throne and worship him who lives for ever and ever. They lay their crowns before the throne and say:


“You are worthy, our Lord and God,
to receive glory and honor and power,
for you created all things,
and by your will they were created
and have their being.”




 
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Jeshu

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i"For it is impossible, in the case of those who have once been enlightened, who have tasted the heavenly gift, and have shared in the Holy Spirit, and have tasted the goodness of the word of God and the powers of the age to come, and then have fallen away, to restore them again to repentance, since they are crucifying once again the Son of God to their own harm and holding him up to contempt." Hebrews 6: 4-6. look it up.

You have never seen God so this doesn't apply to you. I challenge you to deny His love after you meet Him - impossible to do that in full that is why Hebrews 6 says what it does, for in part, yes this can happen. Hebrews 4:11-12 warns us that God will cut us up with His Sword, but it is impossible that any one could snatch anyone out of God's hand, our sins can't do that either nor our lack of faith, we best fully understand that, for od simply gets rid of our lack of faith and/or our sins or anything that stands in the way between Him and His kids. He loves us 100 percent true but hates all untrue us 100 percent for real, that is why you ought to lay down your bad life for Him for He lays down good life for you, that way you quickest make friends again. Honestly true.

Best of courage.
 
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X-Ray

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answer me one last question, jeshu. i understand that you are a god fearing man, and claim to have been in the pit that i find myself in. before the question, however, i need to address something you said. first, you said to cast away the bad life by picking up the good life in him that i once had, but then say that particular verse doesnt apply to me because i never knew him. u dont know me. u dont know how much i trusted him with. im not talking about going to church every sunday, or reading my bible all the time. i did do these things, but i felt like a actually knew him. i was even afraid that i wasnt good enough for him, which im not, and tried to make my father proud through a relationship of prayer and devotion. i laid many things down in my life because i thought they would interfere. i was HAPPY. so dont sit there and say that i never knew the father, because you wouldnt know, he would. my doubts started coming after a church that id been attending betrayed me. i realized that in the 2 YEARS that id attended that church, i had not grown at all. no, i didnt rely fully on the church for my relationship with him, but it still hurt that the things they were teaching wasnt drawing me closer to the him, but making me content, which was not the plan. that scared me, and i stopped going, and went to a different church for a while. the same thing happend. can u believe that they had a full three week sermon about how they needed donations for upgrading a part of their church! they were even telling the young kids in sunday school to talk to their parents about donations. after this, i eventually go to thinking that if the so- called children of god were so corrupted with money and worldy things, i could i trust the one who taught them? and if he didnt teach them, why did he let this happen. those churches pushed me away, and probably countless others, while others sat in the pews with a content smile on their face while rotting on the inside. these people BELIEVED in god, yet they will probably meet the fate of the people revelations, where god will say that he never knew them. now for another question. you say that god is loving, and everyone else says that he knows the past, present, and future. he is god of all. so tell me why, when he creates the shard of life that we call babies, and places it in its mothers womb, ready to be born in w world of hate and deceit, and he saw what that baby would become, a 22 year old man who has a heroine addiction and kills himself at 23, and goes to rot in an eternal hell, tell me why after seeing this, he places him in the womb? he KNOWS that that baby will amount to nothing. people say that he created us so that we could learn to love him, and live with him for eternity. well, is that normal, than? to sacrifice hundreds of millions of people that HE created to hell, while he has a select few who can be with him. is that normal? would you call that normal, or selfish. when he created me, he KNEW that i would suffer from suicidal tendencies and most probably go rot in a dark place full of torment, FOR WHAT. so he could frolick around with you and other "christians". i know that this is what you would call blasphemy, and your probably right. i guess im going to one of the deeper levels of hell for this. and ill admit, i dont know everything,i dont. but neither do you. so i hope that u get what u desire, i really do. i do. but just remeber me and the countless millions of other people screaming in torment beneath your feet. i hope u get what u want
 
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Jeshu

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answer me one last question, jeshu. i understand that you are a god fearing man, and claim to have been in the pit that i find myself in. before the question, however, i need to address something you said. first, you said to cast away the bad life by picking up the good life in him that i once had, but then say that particular verse doesnt apply to me because i never knew him. u dont know me. u dont know how much i trusted him with. im not talking about going to church every sunday, or reading my bible all the time. i did do these things, but i felt like a actually knew him. i was even afraid that i wasnt good enough for him, which im not, and tried to make my father proud through a relationship of prayer and devotion. i laid many things down in my life because i thought they would interfere. i was HAPPY. so dont sit there and say that i never knew the father, because you wouldnt know, he would. my doubts started coming after a church that id been attending betrayed me. i realized that in the 2 YEARS that id attended that church, i had not grown at all. no, i didnt rely fully on the church for my relationship with him, but it still hurt that the things they were teaching wasnt drawing me closer to the him, but making me content, which was not the plan. that scared me, and i stopped going, and went to a different church for a while. the same thing happend. can u believe that they had a full three week sermon about how they needed donations for upgrading a part of their church! they were even telling the young kids in sunday school to talk to their parents about donations. after this, i eventually go to thinking that if the so- called children of god were so corrupted with money and worldy things, i could i trust the one who taught them? and if he didnt teach them, why did he let this happen. those churches pushed me away, and probably countless others, while others sat in the pews with a content smile on their face while rotting on the inside. these people BELIEVED in god, yet they will probably meet the fate of the people revelations, where god will say that he never knew them. now for another question. you say that god is loving, and everyone else says that he knows the past, present, and future. he is god of all. so tell me why, when he creates the shard of life that we call babies, and places it in its mothers womb, ready to be born in w world of hate and deceit, and he saw what that baby would become, a 22 year old man who has a heroine addiction and kills himself at 23, and goes to rot in an eternal hell, tell me why after seeing this, he places him in the womb? he KNOWS that that baby will amount to nothing. people say that he created us so that we could learn to love him, and live with him for eternity. well, is that normal, than? to sacrifice hundreds of millions of people that HE created to hell, while he has a select few who can be with him. is that normal? would you call that normal, or selfish. when he created me, he KNEW that i would suffer from suicidal tendencies and most probably go rot in a dark place full of torment, FOR WHAT. so he could frolick around with you and other "christians". i know that this is what you would call blasphemy, and your probably right. i guess im going to one of the deeper levels of hell for this. and ill admit, i dont know everything,i dont. but neither do you. so i hope that u get what u desire, i really do. i do. but just remeber me and the countless millions of other people screaming in torment beneath your feet. i hope u get what u want

Oh brother by your own admission you don't know Him, you served a religious god, I used to do that as well. hen you see God then you meet consuming fire brother - all your questions and charges against God would fall to the ground and you would repent like Job in I myself also did in dust and ashes.

Before I go on trying to answer you, I want to assure you I have been where you are now. I have tormented myself with the same thoughts you do now. I even raised my voice up to the heavens and cursed Him to the face not caring about his threat of hell and told him in no uncertain terms to F-off out of my life.

So though I don't know you I know the situation you are in very well. I know very well how to be angry with God because of lies. That is why I know for certain that you don't know God whatsoever, but like me served an religious ideal dressed with pomp and glory but is ruthlessly cold hearted reptile as to who he really is, a bloody liar an impostor who has usurped God's place down here through lies and so keeps the truth at bay.

I will try firstly to explain what to me so you understand a little better why I say what I say. When we meet God then we meet inapproachable light, a light so powerful that His love literally lifts us of our feet and burns up all lies and all untruthfulness, no darkness whatsoever, only light.

Now the astonishing thing of this is that when this moments occurs - time and again - then we die to sin and lies completely and only know truth and light. That is what it means to be enlightened.

When God enlightened me to His love the first time I was lifted of my feet and hovered above the ground in utter blissful love. At the time I knew all truth and all truth knew me! Not only that I was all time and all time was me. Not only that all my anger and hatred against Him fueled the fire of His love for me and set me free forever from the lies who had tormented me.

Therefore I know I will never deny Him. I know I can't do that ever, not because I lost my free will but rather because I gained it! His love is far far far better than life! I know that each time doubt or unbelief came afterwards to rob me of God's treasures the Light of this first meeting would wipe out all possibility of God being not as He says He is. For when you meet God then you meet The Word in real life my friend - or rather you walk - in the Word - with The Word - through The Word - from The Word - and for the Word! (The four craftsman!) Now if you can demonstrate to me that you know God like that and are still angry with Him then I will acknowledge that you knew God for real but as it stands now and considering your accusations against od I know for sure you haven't met Him.

Now about answering your question

I have done the same sin as you charge God with. I'm a dad and my wife and I and God brought four kids in to this world. I love them like anything, like I know my wife does and I know God does. However my kids have the freedom not to love back and at times they don't and transgress against the love we have and say and do bad things, still God loves them, my wife loves them I love them and we hope and pray that they will learn not to deny love but to heed Him at all times and let Him grow in their hearts and let go of all that is not loving.

This is how the truth is of God is my dear fallen and angry brother.

The problem is the reality of the truth of the lies ruling peoples hearts because people want lies to rule them and not od's loving truth. As a matter of fact they trample His love and His truth on a daily basis and bring all kind of bad life into being and then turn around and blame God fro doing that, hurting Him even more because God is totally innocent as we can see on the Cross and yet both religious people and the world crucify Him continually to the lies ruling tis planet.

So to answer your question God suffers this misery down here more than any of us 100 percent of the time. He is all of our good life and He dies in each and everyone of us when we follow lies instead of Him. For God is The Truth brother, the truth of lies is not good as we both know full well to be true but His truth is good but trampled on.

So for God faith, hope and love are also the three remaining forces at work. Each child He brings into being He knows is His and though He knows the liar will rob his or her true life away and bring darkness, pain and suffering in its place, He also knows that true life will always be resurrected again so that evil wont win. So the tiny amount of suffering we sinful human being must go through, to attain the od-Head doesn't compare in any way to the glory He has in store for us and that is what matters most the Alpha and Omega remember? That is who God is, first and last, and everything in between He has brought unto a good ending. I and many other believers eat/dine from Him every day like this and know Him to be totally trustworthy, faithful and truthfully loving to be.

I have much more to say than this but like to define the grounds clearer than is. Here I'll share you an article I wrote against protest atheist - I know you don't quiet fit the bill but maybe it makes sense in your situation as well. See what you think.

Enjoy.

Paradise and the tree of good and evil.

The beauty of Eden, God's creation for Adam and Eve, our first parents, is beyond our imagination. Furthermore, it is incredibly hard for us to understand how wonderful life in this garden must have been. All human needs were fed abundantly and continuously. There were no illnesses and there was no death, no heavy or meaningless labour, no maintenance of human works or structures and no money. As for spiritual things, spiritually everything was great. There were no evil desires, thoughts or ideas, no mixing of good and evil. There was no guilt, shame or regrets. Best of all though, must have been the fact that Adam and Eve could commune with God. Yes, as it states in the Bible, God visited His image bearers in the cool of the day. There was only one thing that could mar this beautiful setting. For this we need to look in the middle of the garden where there were two special trees; one was the tree of life and the other the tree of right and wrong. (Genesis 2:9.)

Why would God have done things this way? Why on earth did He plant the tree of right and wrong in the middle of this perfect garden? Did God really need to create such a tree? These questions are extremely common arguments against our God. Such people are called protest atheists. Indeed this form of unbelief sees humanity as a victim of a revengeful and vindictive God, and in disgust they refuse to serve or submit to Him.

Indeed many unbelievers today blame God for the suffering in this world. They argue that God did not need to put this particular tree in paradise, and that even if He did, He didn't need to punish people with such heavy curses.

Insight into these questions are often very important to Christians today, as many believers struggle with similar questions. Why, for example, did God not forgive our first parents of the wrong committed? Why did thousands of years have to pass, with billions upon billions of people suffering, sinning and dying? Yet all God had to do in paradise was to forgive Adam and Eve, you would think.

However the above views have little understanding of the marvellous complexity of Creation and the utter devastation Adam and Eve caused by their wilful disobedience. Clearly the two trees in paradise represented spiritual realities. The tree of life, for example, produced fruit that when eaten continued life. As long as Adam and Eve ate from it their lives would persist. On the other hand, the tree of good and evil also represents spirituality but instead of life it causes death. God warned His creatures about the fact that good and evil in our hearts don't produce lasting good.

When we read the story of the fall in paradise we can see the truth for ourselves.

"Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the Lord God had made. He said to the woman, "Did God really say, "You must not eat from any tree in the garden'?" The woman said to the serpent "We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden, but God did say, "You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die."
"You will not surely die," the serpent said to the woman. "For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil." When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband., who was with her, and he ate it."(Genesis 3:1-6. NIV)

See? Here we are told that the devil, a fallen angel, had been scheming carefully. He knew that the tree of good and evil was his only chance to become the god of this world. We must not doubt that this was his goal. (Isaiah 14:3-17) For he presented Adam and Eve with the lie twisting the truth in such a way that the infamous fruit was taken and eaten by both God's image bearers. Can you see that evil was really around?

Here is what happened, untrue thoughts and feelings entered Eve's heart � the devil's lies fed her spiritually. These were prevarications which brought the suggestion to become as wise and powerful as God Himself and to simply eat the fruit of right and wrong because it looked delicious. And so by purposefully ignoring God's dire warning, she reached out and let this inner reality rule the moment and became disobedient. Consequently Eve ate, and Adam followed in her footsteps.

Retrospectively Satan had spoken a half-truth for Adam and Eve now knew good and evil. Yet as God had warned their life crumbled instantly. Their eyes were opened and they understood what was within this reality of good and evil. For look, they became aware that they were naked, can you see the infamous fruit spreading its poison, bringing instant shame, guilt, fear, hiding away and blaming. Spiritually God's created good, truthfulness, inner bliss and constant happiness died. In other words, paradise and eternal life was already lost to them.

The tree was there as a warning with real-life consequences, for now evil wrong has found a place within humanity. The devil took his new position as ruler starting his diabolical rule. He is the one that shapes spirituality after his own nature, shame, guilt, hiding, blaming, fear and scores of other inner thoughts and feelings which cut us off from good-bringing evil into our spiritual being and killing it. It is not for nothing that one of the names of Satan means Destroyer.

God didn't interfere because, as His creatures in charge, we have been created with a freewill. God would have had to destroy our psyche - we would have turned into robots who could only do "programmed good" for eternity-no Godlike image in that, no freedom in such a thing either.

How on earth could it be God's fault that evil is possible? Is it God's �mistake� that freedom of choice means the possibility for someone to make the wrong choice?

This is what the tree of good and evil was for - a warning not to eat from such a reality. For how can good in a truthful setting - the reality of Adam and Eve before the fall - mix with evil lies and expect to remain untouched? Our spirits could be compared to water or even air, and we know that once this is polluted, it takes an enormous effort to become clean again. (As it took God, in Christ, an enormous effort to clean us. (Romans 5:12-20 ))

Clearly protest atheists, and all who blame God for the world's misery, have it terribly wrong. The Bible tells us that the devil is guilty party number one. He has by deliberately misleading Adam and Eve caused untold misery in God, creation, and in the hearts of Adam and Eve's descendants.

The devil has directly and indirectly caused all the pain and suffering creation has gone through. A fiery lake is awaiting him as repayment - and that is a really good thing surely? (Revelation 20:10) Not so good is the fact that humanity at large is still under Satan's control. Tell-tale symptoms that we are controlled by his wrongs are ongoing thoughts and feelings of guilt, shame, sadness, confusion and its insecurities, doubt and fear, and/or becoming more selfish, arrogant, violent, dishonest, greedy and lustful. They show that we still listen to the devil, either accusing us with our wrongs or talking us better than we are. Trying to make us do right in our own strength or giving ourselves over to his wicked suggestions. In these scenarios the Dark one is still playing the god of our lives.


The devil continually uses our wrongful sin to kill indwelling good and has ruled humanity this way bringing untold suffering, yes, devilish horrors upon Creation as a result. God didn't bring such wicked evil � Satan, often in co-junction with us, did. (See the story of Job and Jesus, for example.) After the fall into sin, God wasn't our Father King any more-Satan was. Life wasn't free or eternal any more. Instead, the devil keeps using wrong within, killing our potential to produce lasting good. Through deception Satan became the god of this world and creation still groans today as result of this. (Romans 8:20-23) He has been on this throne for thousands of years already - the true power broker behind the darkness in world's current affairs.

On the other hand we have Jesus, the only begotten Son of God, who refused to listen to Satan (Matthew 4:1-11). He refused to be divided within. He stayed both truthful and loving - the two spiritual trademarks of our God. Even in the end, when humanity under the influence of the devil dragged Him to a cross, and an early agonising death, Jesus stayed true to God the Father, Himself and to us.

Please understand that Jesus was killed by wrong, Wickedness murdering God's good-even as Satan murders the truth in us, killing the opportunity of lasting good to grow within our soul. So the Chosen ones die at the Devil's hand, often people, both those who think themselves righteous as well as those who are unrighteous, helping him eagerly to achieve all that.

Yet God The Father raised Jesus from death, making Him victorious over Satan and his henchmen. This makes Jesus Christ the true liberator.

He has broken the curse, and if you seek Him with your entire heart, submitting to His rule of love, you will also taste the victory of the cross. In Him our lives of good and evil ceases. The curse replaced with true life - for all that we can find inside of our nature as humans. His love setting us free to rule our own selves again free to love everyone. True freedom once more, us, seeking, loving, adoring, praising, thanking, glorying, worshipping, submitting, and prostrating ourselves to God's truth. Indeed in Jesus we can not die any longer - instead we may reign with Him forever.

That is the deal I'm committed to - no more eating of the fruit of right and wrong. Instead I eat the bread of life, the bread that Jesus sends to those who put their trust in Him. (John 6:35-40)
 
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Greg J.

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its makes it harder as well because ive been to MANY churches and have heard stuff along the lines "you have to dedicate your every waking second to god" or "good people cant do good things if their not christians"
This is not Christian evangelism. What you really need is to ask God to forgive you your sins, thanks Jesus for dying for them, and ask God to be the Lord of your life and to help you believe in Him. You have to really mean it, though.

Some people who have lost everything and are suffering can pray this and really mean it, but it isn't necessary to be in a dark place. Examine your heart as to why you might not really mean it. Often the reason is that people don't want to submit to God (or anyone else). It is made easier best by recognizing that the God you submit to does or allows everything out of love for you, and that it all will be proved incredibly worth it eventually—usually partially in this life. All suffering is because of sin and none of it is God's fault. Why does God allow it? Why to people keep sinning?
 
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Guide To The Bible

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i never asked to be placed here. i never asked for life. i never asked for torment, or pain, or anguish, yet here i am. why?why did he create life at all? why would he put life itself through this?

Now we get to the point - Suffering. If you were happy you wouldn't be asking all this. Obviously. Thing is there is no happy without the sad to contrast it, instead aim for peace. This was Jesus' main command along with "Fear not". Be at Peace.

You might have questions still but then what's new, do you think the questions will ever stop for any of us. No. Sometimes we must just let go of a question or two and not put pressure on ourselves to answer everything. In fact it's not even expected of any of us, or you. ;)
 
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Jeshu

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i never asked to be placed here. i never asked for life. i never asked for torment, or pain, or anguish, yet here i am. why?why did he create life at all? why would he put life itself through this?


You did not ask but you did find so now it is about understanding the purpose. I know Jesus brought my past suffering and my present suffering and will my future suffering to a good ending so why torment myself with bad life when that is just a phase to pass by?

You stay in your misery though you know that way out now why are you doing that God may be asking you? You know lies bring darkness not light yet you heed lies rthat bring darkness and then you ask why? Grab hold of the truth let go of the lies like you say you don't want bad life why treasure it then? Get rid of it. Stop hurting your Heavenly Father and brother with your crap - just dump the whole caboodle called your misery into that pit and see how fast you transcend, no need to hurt life when He knows it is good!!!

However it seems to me that you want to be angry. You want to hate God. You want to be in darkness. You keep heeding hopelessness, despair, hate and anger but you don't want to heed the loving truth of God, no wonder why you are hurting, God is hurting you!! Please stop crucifying the innocent and like the murderer on the cross repent of heaping abuse on Him and enter paradise even today.

I hope there will come a day that you will be able to rejoice in your suffering instead of agonise it. I know from experience what a great difference there is between the two.

Peace


I wrote a prose about our worth in Jesus to try and show people that suffering is not as bad as it tries to make out to be in comparison to what God has in store for us after we learned our life lessons. For in Christ we inherit the God-head what more could anyone possibly want? God shares Himself that is why He has Created us for us to be His rightful Children. How I love Him for saving us from our misery and turn it all to our benefit. Hallowed be His holy Name!




Our Soul's Worth In Jesus.

Our soul is worth more than all the wealth of the universe, as His Truth shapes our life. Our existence is worth a lot of love, and goodwill too. That's why God The Father sent Christ to lead us on The Way to true and lasting being. Caring so deeply for us especially when we slip and slide down that agonising decline sinful life so often brings.

Our soul is stronger than pain can bring to bear, for nothing can rob us of our life's reality. Good or bad, the Hand of Truth will always carry our existence. Even pain is subdued in the end by our inability to cease, even in the face of dying and death, it will serve just a memory, as a 'child' is born anew within us, time and again.

Our soul will endure for all eternity, harvesting that which we sow around, feeding from the abundance that wells from Being. We are individuals with a personal identity in Being, small images of truth in action, radiating around The Kernel, we exist, a quantum within The Universe, sprouting existentially.

Our souls discovering immortality have many perspectives in sight, eyes rimmed all around the truth that is life's wheel, we cycle on. For why hasn't love got more to say than - 'I love you' - if that wasn't because nothing more or better could ever be said which hasn't already been spoken? And so the truth is our best Friend, even if our truth has not always been the most angelic, this fact remains, in His Loving Truth we genuinely exist. Let's trust in that! Hallelujah!
 
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