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sleep with a girl?
- Thread starter HowsItGoin
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BAITandHOOk
Member
NormalDan said:
Do you worship Satan? If so, why? I saw your icon under your name and couldn't help myself.
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Linx
Senior Member
It's something that seems ok in theory, but there are just too many things that raise red flags. It's fantastic that your relationship goes beyond sex, but that doesn't mean that all sexual desires are cancelled by that love. Your intentions could be pure, but man...one night is all it takes to throw things askew. We're all human, and temptation can be strongest when we think we can handle it.
I guess my view is that if your goal is to remain sexually pure, to wait until you are married, then you've got to take measures to ensure that that goal is achieved...and most importantly that you don't let any opportunities arise that could sabotage that goal. Your purity is important to you, I can tell, and it would just suck to make a mistake because you placed yourself in a situation that gave you that opportunity. It's best to stay as far away from sin as possible, and while you don't have to answer to others, it's still important to represent your values clearly. It's like living a blameless life...don't give anyone any reason to doubt what you stand for.
Is it wrong? No, I don't believe it is...but the risk is too high and outweighs that argument. Temptation can come so swiftly and so subtly and it would be such a shame to lose that purity you value so much.
Anyways, that's what me thinks...and I don't think it's ever too late to ask for people's opinions. Just be sure to take it to God and let Him help guide your decisions.
I guess my view is that if your goal is to remain sexually pure, to wait until you are married, then you've got to take measures to ensure that that goal is achieved...and most importantly that you don't let any opportunities arise that could sabotage that goal. Your purity is important to you, I can tell, and it would just suck to make a mistake because you placed yourself in a situation that gave you that opportunity. It's best to stay as far away from sin as possible, and while you don't have to answer to others, it's still important to represent your values clearly. It's like living a blameless life...don't give anyone any reason to doubt what you stand for.
Is it wrong? No, I don't believe it is...but the risk is too high and outweighs that argument. Temptation can come so swiftly and so subtly and it would be such a shame to lose that purity you value so much.
Anyways, that's what me thinks...and I don't think it's ever too late to ask for people's opinions. Just be sure to take it to God and let Him help guide your decisions.
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HowsItGoin said:
Hey HowsItGoin, I see no problem with it. I do it all the time with girls I meet/know. Girls like it, and it helps me get into their pants easier. Makes the girl happy and then she will do something for you in return. :itb :bj :smileysex :69
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Shannonkish
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Give the mods and the post a break...
The poster only has 6 posts.
There is currently only ONE moderator for this forum.
The poster only has 6 posts.
There is currently only ONE moderator for this forum.
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headedhome
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You personally see nothing wrong with it but God does. He tells us to avoid even the appearance of evil. This certaunly has the appearance of evil. This is also opening both of you up to temptaion. The enemy will whisper to you as will your fleah. Please both of you need to wake up and see you can't go by your feelings or convictions, feelings lie, convictions can be silenced by your flesh, will, and the world working together to take your focus off Christ.
HowsItGoin said:
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AndyB
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I know this is controversial but if your both adults then i think that sex outside of marriage is not a sin. I think the churches position on the issue is linked to conservative social attitudes from after the death of Jesus rather than instruction from god.
I personally believe that having a sexual relationship with someone you love is a beautiful and natural.
That's my two cents anyway.
I personally believe that having a sexual relationship with someone you love is a beautiful and natural.
That's my two cents anyway.
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Chajara
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My boyfriend and I snuggle up and sleep together all the time. Sometimes we're even *gasp* under the covers! And sometimes I'm even in my jammies (which consist of an oversized tshirt and boxers in most cases.)
Frankly, as tired as we usually are after dealing with school and whatnot... all we want to do is sleep. And sleep, and sleep. And sleep we do. We always have to set my alarm clock, otherwise we'd just sleep through the night together and he wouldn't get home when he's supposed to. It's really a wonderful experience, it's great to cuddle before you sleep. My favorite thing is to curl up against his back.
Anyway, you're fine so long as you don't let things tempt you. Sleeping is just that- sleeping. If you're anything like me, if you're tired enough to sleep you're too tired for sex anyhow.
Frankly, as tired as we usually are after dealing with school and whatnot... all we want to do is sleep. And sleep, and sleep. And sleep we do. We always have to set my alarm clock, otherwise we'd just sleep through the night together and he wouldn't get home when he's supposed to. It's really a wonderful experience, it's great to cuddle before you sleep. My favorite thing is to curl up against his back.
Anyway, you're fine so long as you don't let things tempt you. Sleeping is just that- sleeping. If you're anything like me, if you're tired enough to sleep you're too tired for sex anyhow.
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ascribe2thelord
Punk Rock Christian
HowsItGoin said:
So long as it's not on a bed ... it ought to be okay. Just don't cross any lines.
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S
simpletrust
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I used to do this with my boyfriend (when we were together) when my friendship group had sleepovers and stuff. All the couples would share. It saved mattresses And it was very nice and snuggly, and not sexually tempting because of the surrounding people.
And it was very nice and snuggly, and not sexually tempting because of the surrounding people.
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Sleeping in the same bed
I used to do it. One of my favorite parts of the day was cuddling with my boyfriend before bed, sharing secrets, sharing that part of my day with him, that part of myself that gets a little silly and discombobulated before I drift off. I loved resting my head on his chest and waking up to see his goofy grin and messed up hair. Sometimes with work and school and everything else- it was the only time we could spend together. Especially after scary movies- I just couldnt imagine sleeping there by myself. He was protector and comforter and it was just so nice.
I started learning about the Lord three years ago and at the same time began a relationship with my boyfriend. I didnt think my life was going to change that much- I was just going to read the bible and go to church and get my support and my grounding from God. I wanted God to make me a better person.
When I began to realize that sex was wrong I stopped. But I didnt see how sleeping in the same bed is wrong. Thats not explicit in the bible- so I was off the hook. And yet there were times when I would roll into bed and one thing would lead to another very quickly. Most of the time it DIDNT- but sometimes it did. And I hated myself for it, I began to subconsciously despise my boyfriend for it, and reading my bible with him next to me in the morning was the LAST thing I wanted to do.
And finally when it was just sleeping, I was conquering temptation but I would get back to my house early in the morning so that my twelve year old sister didnt know that I had slept at his house- even though nothing was going on. And He put it on my heart and over and over I could hear Him say ever so faintly; CHRISTINA, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? DID YOU BECOME A CHRISTIAN SO YOU COULD SNEAK AROUND, SO NO ONE WOULD KNOW WHAT YOU WERE NOT DOING?
I came to love Christ because I knew He would set me free. Free was the last thing in the world I would feel on those mornings.
So it was hard, but I knew just like every Christian knows if you really search deep down into the mucky depths of yourself in the context of your relationship with God that this wasnt right, this wasnt free. It was costing me a lot more than just indigestion- it cost me intimacy that I was spending on a relationship with a man that at that stage of my life I SHOULD have been spending this intimacy on my relationship with God so that He could teach me the wisdom, relationship skills, trust, and faith that would prepare me for a love one day delivered via special order by the Big Guy, Himself.
The Lord tells us we cant serve two gods and at that time I was trying to serve both Him and my own desire for comfort and affection. When I comes to sin I dont want to live a life of how close to the line can I get- I want to be free. Free for the Lord to use me as He sees fit. When I decided to give up my bedroom closeness- I wasnt sure how things would go. But wouldnt you know it He opened up a myriad of opportunities for other desires of my heart to be fulfilled that were in accordance with His desires. Within 6 months the Lord had blessed me financially, in my friendships, in my living situation, traveling around the world, and with my MCAT score. But more than anything I had been bogged down in not exactly knowing Gods will in my decisions before and it was like taking this step had cleared the fog and I have begun to see His will for my life.
Stepping out in faith is often characterized by things that we do, but it also occurs when we choose not to do something. I took a step out in faith, not sure that sleeping in the same bed was wrong, but trying to seek out and be filled by the promises that God had made to me when I signed on to this Christian gig. And the results move me to tears to impart to you how I have been freed by this decision that the Holy Spirit led me to. I cant describe to you how it feels except to say that every part of my life is better and clearer because I allowed the Lord to lift me out of my own selfish fog so that I could see Him with greater clarity and greater joy in my heart.
hope that this has been somewhat helpful
In His Wonderful Name,
-christina
I used to do it. One of my favorite parts of the day was cuddling with my boyfriend before bed, sharing secrets, sharing that part of my day with him, that part of myself that gets a little silly and discombobulated before I drift off. I loved resting my head on his chest and waking up to see his goofy grin and messed up hair. Sometimes with work and school and everything else- it was the only time we could spend together. Especially after scary movies- I just couldnt imagine sleeping there by myself. He was protector and comforter and it was just so nice.
I started learning about the Lord three years ago and at the same time began a relationship with my boyfriend. I didnt think my life was going to change that much- I was just going to read the bible and go to church and get my support and my grounding from God. I wanted God to make me a better person.
When I began to realize that sex was wrong I stopped. But I didnt see how sleeping in the same bed is wrong. Thats not explicit in the bible- so I was off the hook. And yet there were times when I would roll into bed and one thing would lead to another very quickly. Most of the time it DIDNT- but sometimes it did. And I hated myself for it, I began to subconsciously despise my boyfriend for it, and reading my bible with him next to me in the morning was the LAST thing I wanted to do.
And finally when it was just sleeping, I was conquering temptation but I would get back to my house early in the morning so that my twelve year old sister didnt know that I had slept at his house- even though nothing was going on. And He put it on my heart and over and over I could hear Him say ever so faintly; CHRISTINA, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? DID YOU BECOME A CHRISTIAN SO YOU COULD SNEAK AROUND, SO NO ONE WOULD KNOW WHAT YOU WERE NOT DOING?
I came to love Christ because I knew He would set me free. Free was the last thing in the world I would feel on those mornings.
So it was hard, but I knew just like every Christian knows if you really search deep down into the mucky depths of yourself in the context of your relationship with God that this wasnt right, this wasnt free. It was costing me a lot more than just indigestion- it cost me intimacy that I was spending on a relationship with a man that at that stage of my life I SHOULD have been spending this intimacy on my relationship with God so that He could teach me the wisdom, relationship skills, trust, and faith that would prepare me for a love one day delivered via special order by the Big Guy, Himself.
The Lord tells us we cant serve two gods and at that time I was trying to serve both Him and my own desire for comfort and affection. When I comes to sin I dont want to live a life of how close to the line can I get- I want to be free. Free for the Lord to use me as He sees fit. When I decided to give up my bedroom closeness- I wasnt sure how things would go. But wouldnt you know it He opened up a myriad of opportunities for other desires of my heart to be fulfilled that were in accordance with His desires. Within 6 months the Lord had blessed me financially, in my friendships, in my living situation, traveling around the world, and with my MCAT score. But more than anything I had been bogged down in not exactly knowing Gods will in my decisions before and it was like taking this step had cleared the fog and I have begun to see His will for my life.
Stepping out in faith is often characterized by things that we do, but it also occurs when we choose not to do something. I took a step out in faith, not sure that sleeping in the same bed was wrong, but trying to seek out and be filled by the promises that God had made to me when I signed on to this Christian gig. And the results move me to tears to impart to you how I have been freed by this decision that the Holy Spirit led me to. I cant describe to you how it feels except to say that every part of my life is better and clearer because I allowed the Lord to lift me out of my own selfish fog so that I could see Him with greater clarity and greater joy in my heart.
hope that this has been somewhat helpful
In His Wonderful Name,
-christina
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discipleship8
Active Member
12volt_man said:
I agree with you on this one, I slept in the bed with my ex before and it almost led to sex, in God's eyes the looking and the touching and the toughts were already sex.So in short why in the world would you put yourself in this compromising situation. Your flesh will act up one day, i wouldn't put it past myself brother, be safe.
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M
mebby02
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l don't think its a big deal but l would be careful it might lead to something else you never know. I hope you make the right choice good luck
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