Singles Cafe (3)

[wonderingmommy]

I'm going nuts tonight. The baby's crying, I'm approaching a deadline on an article, and I'm chatting with everyone (and their brother, sister, and pet parrot)! Someone give me something to laugh at.

 

[caitlincares]

I'm going nuts tonight. The baby's crying, I'm approaching a deadline on an article, and I'm chatting with everyone (and their brother, sister, and pet parrot)! Someone give me something to laugh at.

I read something hilarious on another thread.
Let me see if I can find it again...

*going to find it

 

[caitlincares]

PILLSBURY DOUGHBOY'S DEATH OBIT

Obit for the Pillsbury Doughboy...

Veteran Pillsbury spokesman, Pop N. Fresh died Monday of a yeast infection.
He was 31. Fresh was buried Thursday in one of the biggest funerals in years.

Dozens of celebrities attended, including Betty Crocker, Mrs Butterworth, the Keebler elves,
Mary Callendar, Hungry Jack and the Quaker Man.
The graveside was piled high with flours; longtime friend Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy,
describing Fresh as a man who "never knew he was kneaded" .
Fresh rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers.
He wasn't considered a smart cookie and wasted much of his dough on half-baked schemes.

Still, even as a crusty old man, he was considered a roll model to millions. Fresh is survived by his second wife.
Together they raised two children - and have one in the oven.

 

[kelco]

PILLSBURY DOUGHBOY'S DEATH OBIT

Obit for the Pillsbury Doughboy...

Veteran Pillsbury spokesman, Pop N. Fresh died Monday of a yeast infection.
He was 31. Fresh was buried Thursday in one of the biggest funerals in years.

Dozens of celebrities attended, including Betty Crocker, Mrs Butterworth, the Keebler elves, Mary Callendar,
Hungry Jack and the Quaker Man.
The graveside was piled high with flours; longtime friend Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy,
describing Fresh as a man who "never knew he was kneaded."
Fresh rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers.
He wasn't considered a smart cookie and wasted much of his dough on half-baked schemes.

Still, even as a crusty old man, he was considered a roll model to millions. Fresh is survived by his second wife.
Together they raised two children - and have one in the oven.

ROFL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[wonderingmommy]

lol. that's cute! thanks for the smile!

 

[caitlincares]

CLOCKS

Hillary Clinton died and went to heaven.

As she stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, she saw a huge
wall of clocks behind him.

She asked, "What are all those clocks?"

St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a
Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move."

"Oh," said Hillary, "whose clock is that?"

"That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she
never told a lie."

"Incredible," said Hillary.

"And whose clock is that one?"

St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have
moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life."

"Where's Bill's clock?" asked Hillary.

"Oh Bill's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan."

 

[kelco]

Lol!!!!!!!!

 

[caitlincares]

Three Elderly Ladies

One afternoon three elderly ladies were sitting around a table enjoying tea.

One woman said to the others "you know, sometimes I find myself in frontof the fridge with a jar of mayonaise in my hand, and can't remember if Iam supposed to put it away or make a sandwich"

Another woman chimed in saying "you know, I have the same problem.... sometimesI find myself at the stairway landing and can't remember if I'm going upor coming down".

The third woman proclaimed "well, I'm glad I don't have your problems - knockon wood" as she rapped her knuckles on the table three times and said "oh!,that must be the door, I'll get it!"

 

[wildthing]

CC funny girl. funnnnnnnny

 

[wildthing]

*wt fubs his eyes and yawn Look at the screen and see doubles* Good night all, sweet dreams.

 

[kelco]

Three Elderly Ladies

One afternoon three elderly ladies were sitting around a table enjoying tea.

One woman said to the others "you know, sometimes I find myself in frontof the fridge with a jar of mayonaise in my hand, and can't remember if Iam supposed to put it away or make a sandwich"

Another woman chimed in saying "you know, I have the same problem.... sometimesI find myself at the stairway landing and can't remember if I'm going upor coming down".

The third woman proclaimed "well, I'm glad I don't have your problems - knockon wood" as she rapped her knuckles on the table three times and said "oh!,that must be the door, I'll get it!"

Hummmmmmmm. I resemble this!!!

 

[Macrina]

lol

funny stuff people.
What's goin' on in the cafe?

 

[kelco]

Hey Mac!! Nothing much... Just getting ready to hit the sack. Long lousy day.. Night all and sweet dreams....... Catch ya on the flip side.

 

[jenn82]

Welcome to all those just joining us here in the Singles Cafe'!!

Also Catlin those were great...I did really like the joke about the clocks!!!

Good evening all also!

 

[caitlincares]

Morning All.

In honor of all the new cafe visitors lately I brought donuts, muffins, and fruits.

 

[kelco]

Good morning all! I made coffee and tea.

 

[caitlincares]

Morning, sis.

Guess I have to get dressed and head out to work.
I'll be back on later. You have been warned.

 

[kelco]

Morning, sis.

Guess I have to get dressed and head out to work.
I'll be back on later. You have been warned.

Mornin to you too sis! I have class tonight so I don't know how much time I will have online today. If I dont see ya later then .

 

[caitlincares]

Mornin to you too sis! I have class tonight so I don't know how much time I will have online today. If I dont see ya later then .

Someone guessed you were my "online" sis.
I think I gave it away greeting you this morning.
Which means they checked my previous posts.

Someone else had guessed "victoriamarie" which was a good guess too.
I think that person looked at my guest book.
I set up that id which a friend used and then my mom took over it with my neice.

Yep - I am way too analytical sometime for my own good.

 

[wildthing]

Hi you all. Hmmmmmmmmmm fruit.....