Single Parents

[Wednesday]

Ok. While discussing gay adoption/parenting I keep finding the following argument. *A child needs a father and a mother to have a fulfilling upbringing*. Now you do realise that such argument touches not only gay parents but single parents as well.

So my question to conservatives, do you use that argument because it is the only argument against gay parenting you've got? Knowing full well that there are people who were brought up by a single parent, do you think that they had a *fulfilling upbringing*?

I find that argument downright offencive for both, gay parents and single parents.

 

[Sitswithamouse]

I am a single parent and I can bring my kids up a lot better now than when their father was living with us.

I have never known so much calm and peace.
My kids are getting better in their day to day life also.

Dang I just noticed you said conservatives.

Yep, I find it offensive when I am told that my kids will be damaged. They were damaged whilst their father was living with us.

 

[keith99]

Ok. While discussing gay adoption/parenting I keep finding the following argument. *A child needs a father and a mother to have a fulfilling upbringing*. Now you do realise that such argument touches not only gay parents but single parents as well.

So my question to conservatives, do you use that argument because it is the only argument against gay parenting you've got? Knowing full well that there are people who were brought up by a single parent, do you think that they had a *fulfilling upbringing*?

I find that argument downright offencive for both, gay parents and single parents.

One might call me conservative. I am offended that people that have the same label say things so foolish and hurtful. I would have to really work at it to fully describe my disgust in words that are allowed on htis board.

I would agree that a loving mother and father is the start of the ideal. But the full ideal is never reached and saying anything short of the ideal is not fullfilling is garbage. As said on other threads , lack of either is a smaller deviation from the ideal that a truely bad parent.

 

[Wednesday]

Oh no it's great. I want gay/single parents to post their responces here. I also want conservatives to answer those questions.

 

[MatthewKnight]

Ok. While discussing gay adoption/parenting I keep finding the following argument. *A child needs a father and a mother to have a fulfilling upbringing*. Now you do realise that such argument touches not only gay parents but single parents as well.

So my question to conservatives, do you use that argument because it is the only argument against gay parenting you've got? Knowing full well that there are people who were brought up by a single parent, do you think that they had a *fulfilling upbringing*?

I find that argument downright offencive for both, gay parents and single parents.

A single parent should look for someone else to help bring up the child. Going at it alone results in serious psychological problems. A boy needs a mother to nurture him in his first years; and a father to show him how to behave like a man. A girl needs a salient father figure in her life aswell as a mother. While an older brother can fulfill the role of a father to a certain extent, it is not good enough.

As for homosexuality, the Bible overwhelmingly supports a swift death penalty.

 

[BigBadWlf]

A single parent should look for someone else to help bring up the child. Going at it alone results in serious psychological problems. A boy needs a mother to nurture him in his first years; and a father to show him how to behave like a man. A girl needs a salient father figure in her life aswell as a mother. While an older brother can fulfill the role of a father to a certain extent, it is not good enough.

As for homosexuality, the Bible overwhelmingly supports a swift death penalty.

Poe

 

[GrayCat]

A single parent should look for someone else to help bring up the child. Going at it alone results in serious psychological problems. A boy needs a mother to nurture him in his first years; and a father to show him how to behave like a man. A girl needs a salient father figure in her life aswell as a mother. While an older brother can fulfill the role of a father to a certain extent, it is not good enough.

As for homosexuality, the Bible overwhelmingly supports a swift death penalty.

What if my parents are divorced (from 2 years ago), I am living with my mother, occasionally seeing my father for weekends, and I am 16, going to college in 2 years? Do you think my mother needs to get another man in her life to continue raising me for the next 2 years?

Like, where is the line between When a kid has been fully "raised"? And in the case of divorce, if they're living with one and seing the other sometimes, technically they've both still got a mother and father in their life.

Also can you define the phrase "acting like a man" with specific details of what this means to you?

And about the Death Penalty for Homosexuality, wouldn't that be breaking both one of the Commandments and the current US laws?

 

[Verv]

Ok. While discussing gay adoption/parenting I keep finding the following argument. *A child needs a father and a mother to have a fulfilling upbringing*. Now you do realise that such argument touches not only gay parents but single parents as well.

So my question to conservatives, do you use that argument because it is the only argument against gay parenting you've got? Knowing full well that there are people who were brought up by a single parent, do you think that they had a *fulfilling upbringing*?

I find that argument downright offencive for both, gay parents and single parents.

In my experience, most of the single parent homes were not so single parent. Most of the kids knew their mother/father and had a relationship albeit a stifled one.

I totally think that growing up in homes without both parents present is disadvantageous and that is why I strongly oppose the notion of divorces of convenience.

A fulfilling upbringing is up to whoever was brought up that way. If one can honestly say they were satisfied with not seeing either their mother or father a lot and it worked out well then that is for them to say and not for me.

I know if I had a violent father or mother that abused me I think my life would be more fulfilling without them around, that is for certain.

 

[PassionFruit]

America was founded on Christian ideals. I see no problem with applying the death penalty to homosexuals, just as it is in the Bible. It is a grave sin and we have no need for their kind in our societies.

This is deeply disturbing.

 

[GrayCat]

This is deeply disturbing.

Short and to the point.. I was playing around with a whole paragraph trying to articulate that one sentiment, haha.

 

[GrayCat]

But seriously. How do you reconcile that belief with the Commandment "Thou shalt not kill"?

Or is that commandment meant to be taken more subjectively, like "Don't kill those who you follow your beliefs or lifestyle, but anyone else is fair game"?


And yes, as you asked previously, the Definition of Manhood is foreign to me. As is the definition of Femalehood. I assume you are speaking of psychological and emotional masculinity, not physical. Can you elaborate a bit more on how you see it, and why you believe it is important? Not trying to be troublesome, just curious.

I am of the belief that underneath all societal divisions and stereotypes between men and women, they both more similar than different...

 

[MatthewKnight]

Short and to the point.. I was playing around with a whole paragraph trying to articulate that one sentiment

Say what you will. I answer only to the Lord, not abortion, homosexuality, and other socially liberal viewpoints that are contrary to scripture. Unlike Paganism, the word of the Lord does not change to accomodate with the times. It is eternal.

But seriously. How do you reconcile that belief with the Commandment "Thou shalt not kill"?

It is accurately translated "You shall not murder." In Hebrew, as in English, the words for "murder" and "kill" can be used interchangeably, but their different meanings are easily understood from the context.

"And if a man lie with mankind, as with womankind, both of them have committed abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them."

And yes, as you asked previously, the Definition of Manhood is foreign to me. As is the definition of Femalehood. I assume you are speaking of psychological and emotional masculinity, not physical. Can you elaborate a bit more on how you see it, and why you believe it is important? Not trying to be troublesome, just curious.

There are huge differences between men and women. The fact you're even asking this question is a display of the degeneracy of the times. Women play a very important and prominent role in scripture, but the Bible is clear that they cannot hold a position of authority over men. The Bible is very clear that men and women are equal in God’s eyes (Galatians 3:28). But we have different purposes in God’s plan.

Women are the child rearers, homemakers and the feminine aspect that completes the masculinity of her counterpart.

I am of the belief that underneath all societal divisions and stereotypes between men and women, they both more similar than different...

True and false.

 

[flicka]

I'm not going to do it but you are going to be reported and get banned for suggesting ing the killing of homosexuals. You maybe be a POE but thers are just flat out mentally disturbed. And if you are for real you need to get off the boards.

No, I changed my mind. I am gong to do it.

 

[beechy]

Studies show that nearly all homosexuals, if not all, were either distant or had no fathers in their early childhood.

Cite?

 

[Wednesday]

Matthew, are you crying out for some, any attention and fame, even if it is FSTDT front page My darling Poeface.

 

[stan1980]

I'm not going to do it but you are going to be reported and get banned for suggesting ing the killing of homosexuals. You maybe be a POE but thers are just flat out mentally disturbed. And if you are for real you need to get off the boards.

No, I changed my mind. I am gong to do it.

I think he is mentally disturbed. In 2 days i have heard:

"Genetic disease is 100% the fault of the parents diet" followed by pages of ludicrous arguments

"Blacks shoudn't marry whites. The bible is (apparently) quite clear on this" followed by yet more ludicrous arguments

and now "Homosexuals should be put to death"

 

[Bombila]

Getting back to the 'Must have A Father and A Mother' standard of raising the perfect child: I think anyone who believes this guff is harking on a fantasy they have about the American Dream Fifties.

Fact is, nowhere and at no time in history was there a guarantee that children would grow up in a home with both biological parents. Go to any graveyard older than 1950 and you'll find a multiplicity of gravestones indicating two things: young fathers died in wars, and young mothers died in childbirth. And a lot of mothers and fathers died of diseases.

Children manage to grow up fine regardless of who does the raising, as long as they are loved, fed, clothed, sheltered and hopefully educated. It does not matter if the loving guardians who raise them are men, women, step parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins or adopters.

 

[flicka]

Getting back to the 'Must have A Father and A Mother' standard of raising the perfect child: I think anyone who believes this guff is harking on a fantasy they have about the American Dream Fifties.

Fact is, nowhere and at no time in history was there a guarantee that children would grow up in a home with both biological parents. Go to any graveyard older than 1950 and you'll find a multiplicity of gravestones indicating two things: young fathers died in wars, and young mothers died in childbirth. And a lot of mothers and fathers died of diseases.

Children manage to grow up fine regardless of who does the raising, as long as they are loved, fed, clothed, sheltered and hopefully educated. It does not matter if the loving guardians who raise them are men, women, step parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins or adopters.

I was thinking about that myself. Just looking back at my own family tree there were lots of single moms, and probably some dads, for reasons other than divorce and I suspect that's true for almost everyone standing here today. Another thing I noticed was families sharing responsibility for kids with other families who were close friends during particularly hard times. I grew up with the grandkids of a family who shared a house with my grandparents because it was the only way they could all get buy. Sometimes families are created under harsh situations.

 

[FreeSpirit74]

. Go to any graveyard older than 1950 and you'll find a multiplicity of gravestones indicating two things: young fathers died in wars, and young mothers died in childbirth. And a lot of mothers and fathers died of diseases.

That's what happened to my mom, Bombila. She lost her father in Feb. 1942, when he died of a heart attack... he was 49 years old. She was almost 5, and she had an older sister who was 12 at the time. My grandmother raised my aunt and Mom by herself. We were talking about Gram last night, and I asked Mom if Gram had ever met any other men after my Grandfather died. Mom said that, yeah, there were a couple men who were interested in Gram, but I guess she wasn't quite so enamoured by them. *I* think they were fascinated with her Norwegian accent.

My Mom was raised by a single mother and, back in her day and where she grew up, she was very much in the minority. Ditto with the fact that they were on what would be called "welfare" today. Gram had to sign over her property rights to the county, and Mom had to work hard to keep her grades up in school once she reached a certain age. If her grades dropped, the county would've had the right to take her out of school and put her to work to support my grandmother.

 

[FreeSpirit74]

I think he is mentally disturbed. In 2 days i have heard:

"Genetic disease is 100% the fault of the parents diet" followed by pages of ludicrous arguments

"Blacks shoudn't marry whites. The bible is (apparently) quite clear on this" followed by yet more ludicrous arguments

and now "Homosexuals should be put to death"

Aw geez, Stan, you mean I missed my chance to rip Mr. Knight another new one like I did on the Interracial Relationships thread? Darn...that's the nice thing about posters like him, they're great for sharpening your debating teeth on.