• Starting today August 7th, 2024, in order to post in the Married Couples, Courting Couples, or Singles forums, you will not be allowed to post if you have your Marital status designated as private. Announcements will be made in the respective forums as well but please note that if yours is currently listed as Private, you will need to submit a ticket in the Support Area to have yours changed.

Should i report child abuse?

WilliamBo

Well-Known Member
Site Supporter
Nov 2, 2016
771
1,360
East coast USA
✟209,963.00
Country
United States
Gender
Male
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
I'm currently living in an extended stay hotel. A few days ago a woman and a child, I assume it's her daughter, moved into the room next to me. Basically, this woman is yelling very loudly all day long at this poor little girl. She is constantly screaming at this girl, I try not to listen but the tone is clearly verbally and psychologically abusive. I even heard her threaten foster parents to the little girl. It's been going on ever since they moved in about 5 days ago. I pray for the little girl, I feel like she's under psychological trauma all day everyday. This lady is a very, very angry woman. I have not heard any physical abuse but all day long I hear her screaming at this little girl, saying mean and hateful things to her. The girl is no older than 6 years old. I turn my fan on high and play music full blast on my phone so I can't hear it, but even then i can still hear her yelling. I don't know if I should call and report child abuse to the Social Services or not. Do you guys think I should call them and just report what I'm hearing? I don't want to get anybody in trouble or get involved in anybody's business but it is pretty bad...
 
Last edited:

ValleyGal

Well-Known Member
Dec 19, 2012
5,775
1,823
✟121,755.00
Country
Canada
Gender
Female
Faith
Anabaptist
Marital Status
Divorced
If you make the call and nothing happens, your conscience is clear. If you do not make the call and more is going on that you don't hear or see, then you are culpable in that you were passively allowing it to happen. Record (document) everything you have seen and heard so far, particularly phrases that you have heard. And shut off the music so you can record it for one full day, every single incident. Record the time, what was said, the tone, etc.

I don't know where you live, but in Canada, we have a law that makes every single resident and citizen responsible for child welfare. Iow, if we know it's happening and do not report, WE can be charged.
 
Upvote 0

salt-n-light

Well-Known Member
Site Supporter
Aug 8, 2017
2,607
2,525
33
Rosedale
✟188,359.00
Country
United States
Gender
Female
Faith
Non-Denom
Marital Status
Celibate

You don't want to jump to any conclusions unless there is clear evidence you are able to present if you were to call Social Services. Calling social services is not a decision to make lightly.

I would say just knock on the door and ask if everything's alright. If she said yes, and the girl is not running away then walk away. If it continues again, report to the hotel staff to check on them. If that doesn't change anything, or if you're able to get substantial evident to make it a very strong case, then contact the authorities. But I wouldn't jump to do that, if I couldn't make a strong case for it.

You can also make it an opportunity to witness to them. Be a neighbor, offer a time to have lunch and talk with her. Pray with them.Who knows what the mother is going through, as well as the child. But thats up to you.
 
Last edited:
Reactions: WilliamBo
Upvote 0

bekkilyn

Contemplative Christian
Site Supporter
Apr 27, 2017
7,612
8,476
USA
✟700,228.00
Country
United States
Gender
Female
Faith
Methodist
Marital Status
Celibate
Politics
US-Others
I'm not certain how screaming at a kid all day, every day, isn't clear evidence of abuse, but I agree with the person above who said it's not our job to decide. It's also not your job to put yourself into danger by directly confronting the woman. Contact the proper authorities who are trained to handle domestic situations and let them decide how to deal with it.
 
Upvote 0

Take Heart

Be encouraged ♥
Site Supporter
Jul 17, 2015
1,224
1,236
Toronto
✟357,550.00
Country
Canada
Gender
Female
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
even if it's suspected, you should report it. I would even go so far as to record the screaming/video tape that you are in your hotel room, that it's currently 'insert date, time, year' and that you can hear the yelling and verbal abuse for evidence if need be.
 
Upvote 0

WilliamBo

Well-Known Member
Site Supporter
Nov 2, 2016
771
1,360
East coast USA
✟209,963.00
Country
United States
Gender
Male
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single

Those are good ideas, thanks, i was thinking the same thing. The crazy thing is i hear her yelling "thank you God! Thank you Jesus!" a lot. Then i hear her yelling at her daughter "im a woman of God! So you HAVE to obey me!" its bizzare...
 
Reactions: saved24
Upvote 0

Kit Sigmon

Well-Known Member
May 18, 2016
2,032
1,284
USA
✟83,689.00
Gender
Female
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
In Relationship

Report loud hotel guest to the hotel staff...this should be done asap and give
them all the details.
 
Upvote 0

LinkH

Regular Member
Jun 19, 2006
8,602
671
✟51,353.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married

Can Social Services really do anything about verbal abuse? You could look that up first. If the answer is 'no', then is you calling social services likely to make the woman reconsider the way she is acting. If you hear her beating poor he kid, then there may be some evidence they could work with.

Why don't you strike up a conversation with the woman,, and in the nicest way possible, tell her you are really concerned for her daughter, that you hear her verbally abusing the poor kid all day, threatening to send her to a foster home. Ask her if she even loves her daughter at all. You could offer her some way to 'get help' after that, if she doesn't blow up at you firs.t You could be slick about it and ask if she has heard any yelling, and then tell all the awful things some woman is yelling at her kid. She may be able to see through that, though. If she'll listen, try to paint a picture of what that kind of parenting can do to a child. You could start off appealing to her faith, talk about parenting in the Bible along the way. Maybe start off with some passages about how the wise appreciate rebuke.

You could also start off the conversation finding out what church she goes to and inform her pastor(s/elders) about it if she won't listen. Someone else in her life may be able to follow up and hold her accountable. You are a stranger in a hotel.

If you are going to call social services, you could tell her to her face that you are going to do it. You could do this if she rejects what you say.

Anyway, she could hate you for it, and you could ask to change rooms if that is the case. The confrontation may help her rethink her parenting style. If she repents, that may be better for the child than her bouncing around in the foster care system.
 
Upvote 0

now faith

Veteran
Site Supporter
Jul 31, 2011
7,772
1,568
florida
✟279,972.00
Gender
Male
Faith
Word of Faith
Marital Status
Married
From what I can tell, the Mother is a malignant Narcissist.
Unless the Child is wild and is in a state of constant misbehavior.
The fact that The Mother does not hit the Child, may be a sign she has been reported before.
It sounds somewhat like The Mother has taken the Child out of spite for the Father.
I could be completely off base with this, but call anyway their may be a alert out.
If The Mother is this type of Sociopath, she will be a master at maniputlation , so document exactly what is said to the Child.
Get their Tag number, and report this even if she leaves.
Pray for Christ to help ,and I will too.
 
Upvote 0

LoricaLady

YHWH's
Site Supporter
Jul 27, 2009
19,078
12,664
Ohio
✟1,286,814.00
Country
United States
Gender
Female
Faith
Messianic
Marital Status
Private
I'd just advise you to be careful about calling CPS. I mean for sure you should report someone. However, if they don't find anything going on you can get in trouble. At least thats what I was told when I went to report child abuse to CPS.
I have worked a little with CPS and certainly never heard any such thing.
 
Upvote 0

LoricaLady

YHWH's
Site Supporter
Jul 27, 2009
19,078
12,664
Ohio
✟1,286,814.00
Country
United States
Gender
Female
Faith
Messianic
Marital Status
Private
The mother obviously sounds mental. I'm so glad you wrote your OP because that means people will not just be giving advice but praying for the child.

Absolutely call CPS and report the mother! I have worked in the school system and reported more than one case of child abuse. Now, some agencies are better than others. They may well tell you there is nothing they can do without some tangible evidence of some kind. But, still your call may help build up a trail. Also, are any of your temporary "neighbors" concerned and willing to add their 2 cents to CPS?

You say there is no physical abuse, but we can't know for sure, especially about the future.

I pray for your guidance, and help for the girl and her mother.
 
Upvote 0

LoricaLady

YHWH's
Site Supporter
Jul 27, 2009
19,078
12,664
Ohio
✟1,286,814.00
Country
United States
Gender
Female
Faith
Messianic
Marital Status
Private
I would no way try to reason with this woman, no matter how charming you can be, especially about the Lord. She already thinks she is hearing from him, but we know who it probably really is.

She could dangerous. She could take her resentment out on the child. Cover her and the child with prayer,which you probably are aleady doing, ditto cover yourself with prayer. But be careful
 
Reactions: saved24
Upvote 0

Swan7

Made in the image of His Grace
Site Supporter
Aug 3, 2014
9,171
7,365
Forever Summer
✟461,609.00
Country
United States
Gender
Female
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
As someone who has grown up with verbal abuse, it can escalate if nothing is done. I grew up in contstant fear of my dad as a child, and it really messed me up psychologically. Thanks be to God He sorted me out with a mind and heart full of hurt.

So yes, please make the call, it really does sound like abuse.
 
Upvote 0