Should I be worried?

[JKalby]

Hey all, I just wanted to ask something that has been bothering me for a while. I turned christian about 3 months ago now and my life has been much more relaxed & happy. but there's one thing that i have in the back of my head and its that i have a friend that i go to dance parties with, now he doesn't know this but i have been having thoughts about him, even when im not with him. at first i thought this was because when i turned christian that the bible helped me open my heart and be more loving, but this sort of feeling is a bit more than that. What should I do? If i say anything will it mean that i have acted upon sinful thoughts and go to hell? should I say nothing? what do i do to stop thinking about it? I'm still new to christianity and i dont know the basis of this, i know it's wrong for a man and a man to have a sexual relationship, so what do i do and why am i having these thoughts?

 

[BelovedWord]

God gives us free will. That means that He leaves us to make decisions and think things that are normal. Having thoughts and feelings toward someone even someone of the opposite sex is actually quite normal. However, letting the feelings get too far is an act of the devil. He plays with us and our minds. He leaves hints that we should not think this way because it is a sin and such. I will probably get attacked for this but while I am Christian, I feel that Homosexuality is a natural thing. God made us all the way we are for a reason. While the Bible says homosexuality is a sin, I feel that as long as your heart is in the right place, than nothing else matters. Now as far as saying something to your friend about your feelings, make sure that he feels the same way or is gay himself. I don't recommend bearing your soul to him just to have him turn around and berate you. When in doubt pray and let God speak to you about this. You will know when he answers you because you will have the answer you have been searching for. I hope this helps, if not I apologize and wish you the best.

 

[Jayangel81]

I will probably get attacked for this quote]

Id like to say something (in a non attacking way) but I wont

JKalby:

I take it these thoughts are sexual and lustful. The devil loves to put thoughts like these in our heads (as was said) it gets our hormones going and makes us want to act upon it..stay clear from it at all costs.

Pray to God and ask Him to guard you and protect you from these thoughts. I know these are only thoughts right now, but if it ever occurs to creat a stumbling block for you its best to cut it off. Im talking action.

STay in Gods word it will make you stronger esp since you are a new Christian.

God Bless!

 

[JKalby]

"stay clear from it at all costs." what happens if i, hypothetically of course, did act on some thoughts? is there a way to redeem what i may have done with a man who isn't the person i talk about in this thread? this is completely hypothetical of course nothing has happened.

 

[tapero]

Hey all, I just wanted to ask something that has been bothering me for a while. I turned christian about 3 months ago now and my life has been much more relaxed & happy. but there's one thing that i have in the back of my head and its that i have a friend that i go to dance parties with, now he doesn't know this but i have been having thoughts about him, even when im not with him. at first i thought this was because when i turned christian that the bible helped me open my heart and be more loving, but this sort of feeling is a bit more than that. What should I do? If i say anything will it mean that i have acted upon sinful thoughts and go to hell? should I say nothing? what do i do to stop thinking about it? I'm still new to christianity and i dont know the basis of this, i know it's wrong for a man and a man to have a sexual relationship, so what do i do and why am i having these thoughts?

Hi, I'm so glad to hear you are in the body of Christ. Is awesome to read of someone having come to Jesus.

We all have all manner of thoughts going round in our heads. Some we need to know the boundaries of what is and what is not good to give voice to.

Would it edify you or this other person to tell him that you have had these thoughts?

Bible says to edify each other, meaning help build up in the body of Christ.

Christians are tempted especially when new in Jesus. We sin ourselves, we have thoughts which if acted on would be to sin, which we do, as we all fail.

We also have satan working against us, trying to get us off the path we are on, and this is common to occur to new believers who are not aware they are under spiritual attack.

Renewing our minds is a life long process, so reading the bible we may see something hits us now, or may read same thing year after year and not even notice it for a long time if at all. Such is the way scripture is often times.

So, do know that as you are new in Christ, you are just beginning in having your mind renewed (changed) to conform with Jesus' will, and not our will.

This is a life long battle; as even if we get it right one day, next day, battle starts again, same thing, different day, and we keep bringing things to Jesus to help us with whatever it may be.

That's why we are to take up our cross daily. Die to ourselves daily. Not my desire Lord, but your desire.

In Christ, we are now in the Kingdom. In the Kingdom every time we do right and good, we are ushering in the Kingdom (doing Gods will on earth as it is in heaven), and this we strive for, though not where we are beating ourselves up in any way just a natural occurance of walking with God, all at different places, with some changing faster, some slower, some barely a crawl.

We have different environments we come from, different strengths and weaknesses, different things we struggle with where others it's a piece of cake to not struggle, but be sure, all struggle, but in different ways.

I pray that the Lord provide you with a friend, a man, who is non judgemental, and trustworthy, that you can share things with. Fellowship is very important, but it must be someone who is trustworthy. It may be a pastor as well, but be sure is trustworthy before you share things of a personal nature with anyone.

A person who knows it is God who works to change in us and not a person saying, dont taste, don't touch. Because when God does the work, the change is from the inside out.

When man tries to change another man with threats, fear, rules, etc, it is change on the outside, which normally is short lived, only as long as that fear, or person is around to remind you of the don't taste, dont touch.

Outside change doesn't change the inner man. Jesus said, clean the inside of the cup and the outside will be clean too. We are cleaned, by the renewing of our minds, and by faith in Christ.

In the gospels you will see Jesus rebuking the pharisees. They looked good on the outside, but God knew they were filthy on the inside. And to boot required of those who were under them to do things which God never asked and which they themselves did not do.

When I came to Christ, a man stalked me even to church. I, like you, (as you said, you were more loving after coming to Jesus), I thought that I had to be kind to this person, and could not make boundaries, and had to love this person, in a way not healthy for me. (talk to him, let him follow me everywhere, terrify me, etc.)

Finally I told the pastor that this guy was stalking me even into church and during fellowship time, and the pastor said, woah..cause he knew I was doing the same thing, thinking that loving meant to be walked all over, allow whatever the person wants etc.

So, it helped me learn, this is not acceptable from this guy, but it did take me to move out of state for him to stop stalking me, but I at least was free in Jesus to know, if something is not right, you don't let bad stuff in your life just cause another presumes upon you.

So, while yes, you are growing in love as a Christian, growing in love never ever means okay to do wrong or allow others to do wrong to you (abusive, or anything which is sinful.) I mean we don't put ourselves in the place to be constantly abused or led into sin etc.

If you've had this same type of feelings for men before; you need the help of a friend; a trusted one as said before to share with and to help you to be accountable so that you do not fall into wrongdoing. Not that you would but such helps us.

Just as a female and male if alone and if like each other can lead to sinful behavior the same as male to male or female to female if are tempted by such.

You may not know, but is commonly taught for men and women not to be alone in the company of another if being alone might lead to sin.

Or even given the appearance of sin, we are also told to avoid.

The reason is because we are set apart, or to be; as we grow in Christ we are set apart and reflect Jesus in our day to day walk, again; we all fail, but is plenty of ways to avoid wrongdoing. One main one is never being alone with someone may be tempted to do wrong with and is commonly taught to Christians as a way to avoid temptation.

Each of us has our struggles and I don't know if you have had this thought life before or if is new. Even if is first time ever, same thing; need a man you can trust to help you be accountable to, and it sounds easy, but is not easy, but is a good thing which Christians can do.

A man may be tempted by a co worker; may have feelings for her, sexual attraction and she as well for him, and he married, maybe her too. A brother to share that with, to make the man accountable to the brother; helps many people. It may be that man has to leave that job, that state, or whatever to avoid falling into sin with that woman.

You don't need to live in fear. Keep reading about Jesus, which keeps your mind being renewed (changed), and there is a verse which is very applicable to this situation or may be, but is very helpful in all struggles.

In 2 Corinthians 10:

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?book_id=54&chapter=10&version=31

4The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. 5We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

A stronghold is something which we struggle with greatly or just plain give into and do and no longer struggle; just do the sin.

We can in time harden our hearts to things, and not hear God on a matter after time. We may no longer think something which is wrong is wrong for we justify it to ourselves and then partake of the wrong doing. (sin is wrongdoing.)

But above is said we have weapons which have divine power to demolish strongholds.

We have God fighting with us if and when we turn things over to God and let Him help us. The latter part of the verse is very important; where it says we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

So when we think, yes, I'll do this sin, run it by Jesus.. Bring him your every thought as often as it comes up.

You'll see it won't stand. Only truth stands with Jesus, only doing right, etc stands.

Sorry for the long letter here. In closing, no I would not tell this man about your feelings as it would not serve him in love, nor yourself.

In Ephesians 6 we are given what is called the armor to put on every day, and that will also help a great deal, and it is clearly explained what the armor is in this passage:

Ephesians 6:10..

10Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes.

12For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

13Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.

14Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace.

16In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. 18And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.

truth above is God's word, the bible..

breastplate of righteousness, means doing right

feet with readiness, gospel of peace may mean, ready to love and serve and be at peace with others as Jesus would have us do, and by his example

shield of faith very important, but all of these are, but faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word, the bible, sermons, etc.

note that faith extinquishes flaming arrows from satan - so when attacked you can say, my Jesus never condemns me, or such.. many different ways to apply that.

Bless you and thank you for sharing,
tapero

 

[Larry D. McCarty]

First of all let me say this to you, Those thought's you are having is from the devil no one else but the devil! Get your self into a real good Christian Church make sure the church teach the Bible in truth! You need to break it off with your X lover and stay away from that person, but let that person know what you two have been doing is wrong. Get Christian Counseling right now don't wast anytime do it NOW and talk to your Pastor and do what he tells you to do. Their is a book out called Christian Counseling Third Edition A Comprehensive Guide By Gary R. Collins, Ph.D. buy it and read it "it" will help you, here are a few say's from the word of GOD read them from your BIBLE

1st. Corinthians 6:9,10 & 6:11>>>Leviticus 18:22 & 20:13>>>Romans 1:24-27,32

 

[Criada]

Firstly, temptation is not a sin!
If you have a tendency to same sex attraction, it is not worse than a married man looking wrongly at another woman.
However, acting on the temptation would be wrong.. and God can strengthen you in that, and help you.
There is a free online biblestudy course called Door of Hope, which gives a scriptural based way of dealing with this, and being free from the attraction.
As to past sins... God says that he 'remembers them no more'.... you have been made righteous by the blood of Jesus, and that covers all our sins!

1 John 1:9
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

God bless you.

 

[gr1bb]

Remember that even if you do sin (which we encourage you not to), you won't go to hell.

Here's a passage that gives better advice than I could ever give.

2 Timothy 2:22
Now flee from youthful lusts and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.

 

[suzybeezy]

Christians believe that mankind is born sinful. If we feed our sinful desires, our appetite for sin increases. The more we get, the more we want. If a person is born with a greater susceptibility to anger / rage, does that make it right for then to give into those desires? Of course not! The same is true for all sinful desires.

God promises the strength for victory over sin, including homosexuality, to all those who will believe in Jesus Christ for their salvation.

1 Corinthians 10:13 – “No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And god is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.” (NIV)

 

[Brendan1000]

Never forget that even though there is often temptation for lust, the underlying respect and (non-sexual) love for a fellow man or woman may be a greater force in our hearts. Even when people feel like they're doing something wrong, they can often dig deep down and find the right reasons which will help us do the right thing.

 

[nopekp]

if he touch your wife do not let him in home