Should He Have Left?

[lovinghimalways]

Hi this is a long post sorry, please dont judge...I am what someone would call a baby christain....I was a wild girl a single mom with no father in the picture..Well 6 months ago I told God I wanted him in my life and a manI am 24 and there are alot of boys I should say I have dated and it has never worked I was even married for 2weeks then moved out devorced.So right there I have major trust issues..Well back to 6 months ago after I had told God that I need him in my life,a day later I met a 30 yr old man he was here travaling for work with the Windmills I live in Idaho.Well he tells me he is a man of God and is going to be a minister.Well at the time my son was living with my parents and I was basically homeless so he got a appt and let me move in plus he would give me 100 dollors a week he said the holy spirit wanted me to have it,He told me about the Lord and I opened up to him more then anyone even my own friends...I thought he was so great I probbly even put the Lord on the back burner..Then as months went on he got pushey,about the Lord he would tell me how wrong I was doing something or that I was going back to my vomit..Or he would tell me the Lord wanted me to be with him then a week later tell me he wasnt ready for me...Well we sinned alot there was sex which we both always felt bad after,and anger going on we would chock hit namecall each other..Well a few weeks ago we found out I was Pregnent,Well he was low on money so he went back to FLORIDA to be with his family while I am here growing are child inside my belly.He acts like he never got me preg and tells me the lord told him that he would not be a father.He prayed when we found out that the baby would go back to the lord. He says that prayer he could feel the Holy Spirit.I know to trust in the Lord but he tells me that when I bring something up about being pregnant with out telling me his own thoughts on it he says he uses only his spiritual mind.I feel he uses the Lord to get out of stuff.I hope God bless him and Myself.I feel completly lost I know if I had a abortion I would dig myself in a deeper hole.I dont want to go through this alone again its took a toll on me all I do is lie in bed and cry...I do want this child but I would love to do it together work on our problems,but he dosent know if he is going to come back and only if the Lord tells him to be with me he says he is closer to the Lord in Florida..Plus if I bring this baby up he hangs up on me or wont return my emails,but if I talk about other stuff he acts happy for me!! I have prayed about this over and over but I have never had the Holy Spirit talk to me to guide me that I know of.I feel so Lost and my trust for anyone is gone except the Lord.I am living with my parents again and I pray eveything works

 

[JennlikesSam]

Well first of all, I am not here to judge you. We all mess up! You seem confused as to what truth is. Your unborn baby's father seems to think he can change God's Word and act however he wants to by saying that he was "led by the Holy Spirit".



You know getting an abortion is sin. It is killing an baby. God's Word is very clear on that! God wants to bless you and give you an amazing life. A baby is a gift from the Lord. You must choose to put God first in your life. It sounds like you stopped trusting in God to provide and starting looking to a man, which got you deep into sin and far away from God.

Remember God is always there with His arms open wide waiting for you to run to Him. He tells us to come to Him and lay all our burdens down and take up His, which are easy and light. (Matthew 11:28)

He loves you desperately and desires nothing more than for you to completely surrender all of your life to HIS control... He can take care of you!! He's a BIG, loving, good God!

Just remember that there is always forgiveness in Christ. His Word is what you need to base your life on, not some man's opinion of what the Holy Spirit is telling him. Ask yourself " does this line up with God's Word" and if it doesn't, it's wrong!

Spend some time every day reading the Bible and praying for God's direction and wisdom.

I would love to help you and pray for you anyway that I can! email me if you would like to talk more. JennlikesSam@aol.com .

 

[jollyjosh]

i don't know what to say but i prayed for you

 

[silentpoet]

Do not worry that I will judge you. I judge only one man harshly and that is myself. Just know that God is with you in your struggles and will see you through them. The advice above from JennlikesSam is pretty good.

 

[Anti Existance]

Life is a minefield, be sure not to step on one.

You stepped on many minefields in your life, and let 'unacceptable' things happen, and unacceptable people into your life.

Where is your foundation? Where is your study? Where are the things you can rely on? You have nothing, my advice therefore is for you to generate a massive backbone, i would give up the child for adoption.

You are unable to support this child, and people just drop you like a brick. This is because you make derranged decisions in your life.

A lot of people think , marriage + kids = automatic happyness.

That's a down right lie. You have to have a foundation + a future to stand on, otherwhise your life will crumble time and time again. its horrible that a would be man of God left you alone like that, conclusion is that he's not a man of God, you might need to be a boy to make a girl pregnant, but it takes a REAL man to support a family.

Ask yourself the question, what in heavens name am i doing against myself?

You are constantly bringing yourself into disasterous situations. THINK before you act. You cry because first you make wild irrational and illogical decisions, then you are left with the chaos, and then you have to repair. But instead of repairing you start crying, my advice. Preventing is better then healing, another advice is stay out of trouble, a lot of your decisions have brought you tremendous grieve, your choices have created this reality, to get out of it you need to make wise choices.

Its cliche but use your brain. Think , will it benefit me and my child? Guys would often only like you for sex, you are a person who easily gets children, you are also overly uneducated, your low level thinking has got you into this mess. You never thought about the long term consequenses of your actions haven't you?

You are dragging a lot of people down with you in your misery. Your child will get a horrible future as the result of your radical , many more people are affected by your decisions then you initially have thought. You are very immature on several levels, and i am severely questioning how you where parented yourself. I would not be suprised if you came from a divorced household and had terrible examples in your life as role models.

I can only pray that you find stability in our lord, who wants you to put order into the chaos of your life.

 

[nowhereville]

When I was a new christian, I too dated a man who was a christian. He'd grown up in the church and could quote scripture all day long. I respected him. I was so new and so naive I never stopped to think, "wait a minute, sex without marriage is a sin so how great a christian can he be?" I don't mean that I should have judged him, just should have looked at his fruit a little harder I suppose.

I too got pregnent and lo and behold even though we were dating exclusively, it might not be his...???

I went on pregnent and single and gave birth to a fabulous baby girl who I kept and raised.

It happens plain and simple and if you're coming out of a difficult and less then godly background, it's much more likely to happen, trust me I know.

I wouldn't worry about what he does or does not do. He's made his intentions clear by his actions. He can quote scripture and judge you but apparently he does not measure his own life with the same yardstick.

God is your Father - he knows and cares for you deeply. He will not forsake you no matter what you've done period. That's how it works - its not based on your worth - it's based on who he is.

Children are always a gift period from God. Contact crisis pregnancy centers in your area. That's what they are there for and they can assist you with material needs, support and more. Find a church and attend as often as you can.

You are loved by God, don't let the devil rob you of your joy.

 

[UnitynLove]

Trust in God. He will deliver you from this situation.