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Sexual relationship?? Help!

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ConfusedaboutSex

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Hi, I am new to these forums and have been struggling with some stuff for awhile now and need to see what other people think about it. I have been dating my Girlfriend for about 9 months now and I whole-heartly love her. We have talked about marriage and both want to marry each other. I cant seem to image myself without her. But there is one glaring problem that everyday is becoming more of a problem. That problem is sex. We are both christain people and were raised to believe the same things. I think that sex should be reserved for marriage and should be something that is special between two marriage people. She has somewhat of a differnet outlook on the subject. She has no problem having sex outside of marriage and has in her past relationships. I have also had sex in some of my past relationships but have since repented becuase i realize that it is not what God wants me to do and it is wrong. The problem is is that she wants to have sex. She is a very sexual person and the fact that i deny her of that is putting a very large strain on our relationship. She gets irriatable when she doesnt have some sort of sexual contact with me and it seems to be seeping into other aspects of our relationship becuase there is sexual tension there. We are somewhat sexual with each other in the sense that we dont have sex but we do other sexual things to each other. Though a lot of the times that ends up in a fight between us because i wont have sex with her. Which I also dont feel right about but I dont think she can be with me without them. That kills me to say because i love her and cant imagine myself with somone else. But i also think that God will not bless our relationship if we continue to be sexually impure. How do I talk to her about this without making her feel like I think that she is a bad person and that I think im better then she is. It seems to be a very sensative subject that we have had many arguements about in the past. I dont want to lose her but I want her to understand. How do I convince her that our relationship would be so much more satisfying if we were sexually pure. And also how do I extinguish her ravenous sex drive, or at least get her to control it? Any comments would be very helpful. Thank you all.
 

Johnnz

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Neither of you seem to have had a deep seated conviction about sex and marriage. That makes it easy to fudge the edges. Your girlfriend seems quite unsure about biblical standards for sex.

A high sex drive does present problems for a single person, no doubt about that. But that just makes it so much harder to control, but not impossible.

Does she have some background issues such as abuse or insecurity?

John
NZ
 
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