Seeking some advice

[peaceblossom]

This is really my only possible resource for any advice that may be benificial. For those who don't know (and there are many), I'm a 25 year old single mom of one son (he's 2) and although I've grown up in a Chistian family, I've only just started to diligently seek God on my own several years ago. And sadly, I cannot go to my family because inspite of their faith, they continue to judge me and they treat like I'm not good enough. Things are hard because I work 2 jobs and go to school. Sadly the job I currently have will not allow me Sundays off, which is really stunting my spiritual growth and walk with God. This is something that I'm working on, but I feel like I'm under attack. These are the things I've done recently to help me focus more and to improve my walk with God:

Praying daily and taking time out of the day to study God's word.

Transferred the Holy Bible from compact disks onto my mp3 player so that I can listen to the bible while reading alond for better understanding.

Still removing secular media and music and exchanging it for media that helps me to focus more God and his desires for me.

Reading christian life books by authors that explain how to apply God's teachings to everyday life.

Because I do not get to go to service on Sundays, I've been listening to sermons on the local christian radio station and watching services on television.

But I feel that there are two things that are bothering me. I don't have anyone I can talk to on a regular basis about my walk. In truth I have no friends that understand what it is that I'm trying to do with my life. I've been to parties and I've gone out to places that the Lord couldn't keep me and I don't want that life anymore. I'm working to align my life in accordence with God's laws. And the more I work at this the more I feel outcasted by the people I used to be able to talk to about things. They laugh because I want to get myself together so that God might bless me with a God-fearing husband. They ridicule me for being careful about what I'll allow my son to watch. I share with them that awesome things that God has helped me to see about myself but they're not interested. Yet when things are going wrong for them, they come to me for advice (which is nuts in my opinion because I am a walking mess just trying to hang on to the Lord). The things is that I can somehow overcome these things, but it's very hard to do alone.
I'm not judging the people I know, but I know that I'm drifting away from the lifestyle that they are living.

I need a real friends in my life that are seeking God while I'm working to strengthen my life. I don't want to go back to the person I used to be. I don't want to do the things I used to do. I feel that God is deprograming me from the things that I once believed about life and re-educating me on what he expects of me and how he wants me to love him and myself. I'm surrounded by people who don't understand me and what I'm working towards. With everything I do I feel like my wheels are spinning sometimes. I get so frustrated because I don't have anyone to fellowship with; someone that I can learn from and become friends with who I can talk to, even if they wouldn't understand me all the time. But I feel like I'm walking alone. I don't have anyone I can call and pray with. Moreso, it would be nice to have someone that I can listen to; hear how their walk was for the day; what they may have learned about something.


Can anyone relate? What can I do?

 

[Fineous_Reese]

hey g'day peace,

some quick advice that i hope to expand on later when i'm not at werk: look through your schedule and see when (if ever w/2 jobs and a munchkin) you can get some time for a bible study. there are tons of churches in and around b'more so it should be possible to find a night other than Sunday that has a good group studying the Word. i ran into similar difficulties getting to church on Sunday while in college and right after when i got this job (although in college it was more a matter of not getting up early enough to travel across the city to my home church) but i finally got a schedule with sunday's off nowdays i'm helping teach HS sunday school and have even been nominated to be a deacon eek: responsibility is skeery) so keep up your perseverance, Paul wrote that we're in a race with a lot of folks watching us from the sidelines. no pressure just keeping running, just keep running, just keep running, running, running. What do we do? we run, run

-Fin

 

[slim]

hey I can relate to what your experiencing I too once worked two jobs along with family responsibilities.Now three years later my job skills have improved so I make enough on one income.I still work Sunday and the rest is at night but the Lord led me to a big church that has a lot going on where fellowship and friendship and service I fit into my schedule. Hebrews 12:1 keep running with endurance in the contest set before us.

 

[Takesha]

Peachblossom,

First I want to tell you that I admire and respect you for trying to get closer to God. The world my laugh because they don't understand, but while they are laughing you will be getting blessed. Pray for those who laugh at you so that they may come to the Lord and be blessed also.

Secondly, here is link you might like to check out http://www.calvarychapel.com/baltimore/ I don't know how close this church is to you but I noticed it has online studies and meetings on Wed. night.

I want to encourage you with this scripture

(Phi 1:6) being confident of this very thing, that he who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Jesus Christ:

I know as you follow the Holy Spirit that new doors will begin to open up for you and you will continue to be blessed and grow.

Pm me anytime you would like too.

Takesha

 

[kbean]

peachblossom
I could relate to many things you've said. I just want to say that God is always there, even when He seems distant and you 'feel' disconnected from Him, in different circumsances. Don't go with feelings! Go with what you know and learn from the word, that He will never ever ever forsake you.

Also, don't get too hung up on the 'sunday' thing. There are many professions which have to operate on sundays, ie, doctors, surgeons, nurses... and they are equally entitled to a relationship with God right? We can't just shut the world down on sundays. I agree with the previous advice I read above, and you may find another day out of the week that you can do a bible study. And worship in your own ways everyday, in all that you do. Do your dishes, laundry, studies, work and rest, with and for the Lord! He was meant to be intimately involved in every aspect of your life, so don't sweat it if sundays just don't work for you right now.
If it is fellowship with others that is really lacking for you, then a bible study group may very well help. Don't be disappointed when you turn to unbelievers or whatever and they can't provide you with support, you have Christ on your side no matter who you are surrounded with.
Keep the Faith!

 

[Kehaar]

Hello Peachblossom

All the other replies have given good advice, so I haven't really got a huge amount to add. I do sympathise with you, your life sounds very full at the moment and you don't seem to have much encouragment or support.

I work shifts, and sometimes it means I can't make a Sunday service either.....which I don't like very much! It will depend on how active the church is, I suppose, but do you know if they have a midweek service or house groups/cell groups? Other replies have suggested this too, but I would also recommend seeing if any of your local churches run bible studies. I go to both bible study and house group once a week (as work allows!) and I find them VERY helpful, its a very positive atmosphere and I gain alot of guidance, support and fellowship from my house group. (I'm a new christian and feel this fellowship has really helped me!)

One other thing I did was to ask to speak to a local pastor. I felt a bit silly phoning up at first, I wasn't sure what I should say. In the end I mentioned that I was a new christian and I wondered if I could talk to him about getting more involved in church. The pastor was very happy to help and he gave me alot of valuable guidance and advice. If you feel comfortable speaking to a local pastor/elder etc. then I would advise it. The pastor I spoke to was very accomodating too - I told him I worked shifts and he worked our meetings round them. It might be a good step to take, just to get started

I would also continue to pray. When I became christian, I had no-one I felt I could really talk to. I had no christian friends, my local church was pretty inactive and I felt very alone. I prayed about it, asking God to give me direction, to lead me to a church that he wanted me to be in, to help me grow, for fellowship with other christians etc. About 3 weeks later I got invited along to a church which I now feel very settled and at home in. God has answered my prayers, and more.

All the other steps you've taken to focus more on God are sound and I hope you will see the benefit of them in your walk.

And I know it isn't quite the same as having someone 'right there' that you can talk to, but if you do need anything, please feel free to drop me a PM. I'd be happy to help any way I can

Astral

 

[e-bwm]

I certainly am not in your shoes, but I really commend you in your perserverence of the direction you are choosing to take. I would like to encourage and, actually, affirm you of what you are already doing, with Heb. 6:1; "But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him."(KJV) This has become a life verse for me and I will go to it to start my devotion, just to remind me that it starts with my seeking HIM first and He will lead me to other sources and means, including this. btw, I agree with all of the previous posts here. Keep it up He will provide the resources. God bless.

 

[Rafael]

We are constantly bombarded by sex, violence, materialism, competition from the moment we rise till we go back to bed. This world is more than difficult to the Christian pilgrim on his journey home, for sure. Renewing our mind and staying in the Word is the only way to not back-slide. I know this from experience. We are either moving forward or backwards it seems. Fighting the good fight of faith takes a lot of action and effort on our part.
If you can't attend regular Sunday services, perhaps a Bible study group through the week would help you find fellowship. Ofcourse pray and ask for God to send you help and circumstances that would open doors for you to have regular fellowship with the Church. As a body of Christ, we need each other and have specific gifts given us by the Holy Spirit to minister to one another.
Continue to renew your mind daily in His Word. The Word of God abiding in us is strong to keep us from the daily darts and arrows of the enemy. Our shield of faith quenches them.
I understand how tough it can be, as I'm disabled and cannot go to Church very often. I miss the strength of others in fellowship very much.
God bless....

Ro 12:2 And be not conformed to this world: but be you transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

Eph 6:16 Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.

 

[christianmom]

You have been given some very good advice! Keep up the good fight!

The only thing I would add is that if you call a local pastor, ask if they have an older woman who would mentor you. Perhaps that would give you someone to call on when you need consel and to help hold you accountable. Also keep your prayer requests known to the church and just attend whatever services/bible studies that you are able to.

It sounds like you have made many many positive changes to your life and that you are making some great choices. It is hard to not have anyone walking with you, but the Bible tells us we are not to be of this world, we are to remain seperate, so don't let that make you feel bad. If you are seperated from this world, then you are heading in the right direction.

Feel free to pm me if you would like. I am raising four children myself. It IS hard.

 

[Blindfaith316]

(((HUGZ SIS)))

I am a 21 year old SAHM, and it really isnt easy cutting out the evil from your life... I am praying for you... Calvary chapel is a great church! (I attend one in NY) they also have online sermons! If you want to talk, you can PM me, God Bless you for trying so hard!!!!!!

 

[allieisme]

Hmm... Is there anyway you can switch the one job that wont let you have Sunday's off? IMO, Everyone needs to have Sunday's off. I'm a mom who has the best blessing of all, because fortunately I can stay home with mine, while my husband works hard, and he has to work on Saturday's sometimes, and if is willing to work on Sundays, he would make double time and a half, and for those of you who know, that kinda talk, that is alot of money! and sure we could use that extra money, but being he is the head of the house, he doesnt feel its good if he doesnt go to church with the rest of his family on Sunday.
I know your situtaion is different, and I will be praying for you. Have you asked God if the job your currently in is the right one for you? Maybe God will direct your paths, if you trust Him.
**Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge HIM and HE will direct your paths.

 

[Violet]

I so know what you're going through! I began to seek the truth when I was a single parent and working all of the time...I never went to church and I was around people who weren't very nuturing to my spiritual growth. In fact, my boyfriend (who I was living w/in sin) used to get very angry when I read the bible. I see now that it was Satan trying to pull me back...and it worked. Please do not give up! It is so much easier when you have someone to talk to who understands....do you belong to a church? If you do ~ do they have Wednesday night bible studies? Most churches have a morning and evening service....maybe you can arrange to attend the evening service? I'm a "baby" chrisitan myself so I may not be able to answer a lot of questions but if you ever need someone to vent or just talk to I'm just a PM away

 

[Blindfaith316]

I'm a mom who has the best blessing of all, because fortunately I can stay home with mine, while my husband works hard, and he has to work on Saturday's sometimes, and if is willing to work on Sundays, he would make double time and a half, and for those of you who know, that kinda talk, that is alot of money! and sure we could use that extra money, but being he is the head of the house, he doesnt feel its good if he doesnt go to church with the rest of his family on Sunday.

thats exactly my family too!!! My husband works atleast 65 hours a week(often times more!)... just so that I can be a stay at home mommy!!!

 

[peaceblossom]

Hmm... Is there anyway you can switch the one job that wont let you have Sunday's off? IMO, Everyone needs to have Sunday's off. I'm a mom who has the best blessing of all, because fortunately I can stay home with mine, while my husband works hard, and he has to work on Saturday's sometimes, and if is willing to work on Sundays, he would make double time and a half, and for those of you who know, that kinda talk, that is alot of money! and sure we could use that extra money, but being he is the head of the house, he doesnt feel its good if he doesnt go to church with the rest of his family on Sunday.
I know your situtaion is different, and I will be praying for you. Have you asked God if the job your currently in is the right one for you? Maybe God will direct your paths, if you trust Him.
**Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge HIM and HE will direct your paths.

I was thinking about leaving the job that I work on Saturdays and seeing if my full time job will allow me to come in on Saturdays instaed of Sundays, but they will not allow it. This is an annoying situation (with the jobs mind you). I really do have my heart set on visiting Calvery Chapel very soon though. The gentlemen that introduced me to this site goes to a chapter in California. He says that I may benefit from visting there so it's definately a place I want to go to.