- Aug 1, 2021
- 1
- 2
- 38
- Country
- United States
- Faith
- Christian
- Marital Status
- Married
New to this group but I don’t know where else to go…..
My husband and I have been married for almost 8 years. When we met he was so on fire for God he couldn’t have a conversation without talking about all he has done for him. He is an Air Force veteran and stuffers from PTSD from being in combat. I knew this when we got married. I knew he struggled with anxiety, but to be honest he was so full of life and on fire for God I didn’t see the severity of how it once was for him. About 2 years ago we got married, he started to struggle again with his mental health. He was on multiple meds, taking supplements and teas. Anything to calm the anxiety. He somehow finished his masters degree and then that was it. He stopped leaving the house. He got into therapy and was starting to feel a little better and then over the course of 2 years needed several emergency surgeries which brought him into a depression so bad he tried to end his life. He went into inpatient treatment for 12 weeks and once he was home I struggled trying to raise our two small children and be strength for him. He was doing therapy, AA(history of alcoholism once he got back from Iraq), and coming off some of the toxic medications he had been on for some time that were doing more harm than good. Fast forward to now, it’s been a year of doing pretty okay. He has his hard days but he got a part time job and has been more present at home with me and the kids. About two weeks ago I noticed something was off, I asked him about it and he kept saying he was just tired. I knew something was off so I kept pushing. He told me today that he had been getting Xanax from somebody at work cause his anxiety has been hard to deal with. I’m struggling. Struggling cause I’ve been lied to in the past about him taking medication or how much he was taking when it got out of control. I am trying to understand that he was dealing with his own demons and was trying to push them down but I feel so betrayed. I have been there with him through so much and it hurts when you feel like you can’t trust your spouse. We haven’t been to church in a while and while I know he listens to sermons on his phone something is missing in our marriage. This man who I was certain would be the Godly spiritual leader that I so desired to have in a husband is gone. We don’t pray together any more. He sleep on the couch because the firm surface is better for his back after two back surgeries. I feel like we don’t communicate. I miss the man I met 8 years ago. I want an honest marriage. I want to be confident when I leave our kids home with him that he isn’t secretly taking medication that may make him drowsy. I don’t know what to do so I’m doing nothing and just coming to God in prayer. Please pray with me.
My husband and I have been married for almost 8 years. When we met he was so on fire for God he couldn’t have a conversation without talking about all he has done for him. He is an Air Force veteran and stuffers from PTSD from being in combat. I knew this when we got married. I knew he struggled with anxiety, but to be honest he was so full of life and on fire for God I didn’t see the severity of how it once was for him. About 2 years ago we got married, he started to struggle again with his mental health. He was on multiple meds, taking supplements and teas. Anything to calm the anxiety. He somehow finished his masters degree and then that was it. He stopped leaving the house. He got into therapy and was starting to feel a little better and then over the course of 2 years needed several emergency surgeries which brought him into a depression so bad he tried to end his life. He went into inpatient treatment for 12 weeks and once he was home I struggled trying to raise our two small children and be strength for him. He was doing therapy, AA(history of alcoholism once he got back from Iraq), and coming off some of the toxic medications he had been on for some time that were doing more harm than good. Fast forward to now, it’s been a year of doing pretty okay. He has his hard days but he got a part time job and has been more present at home with me and the kids. About two weeks ago I noticed something was off, I asked him about it and he kept saying he was just tired. I knew something was off so I kept pushing. He told me today that he had been getting Xanax from somebody at work cause his anxiety has been hard to deal with. I’m struggling. Struggling cause I’ve been lied to in the past about him taking medication or how much he was taking when it got out of control. I am trying to understand that he was dealing with his own demons and was trying to push them down but I feel so betrayed. I have been there with him through so much and it hurts when you feel like you can’t trust your spouse. We haven’t been to church in a while and while I know he listens to sermons on his phone something is missing in our marriage. This man who I was certain would be the Godly spiritual leader that I so desired to have in a husband is gone. We don’t pray together any more. He sleep on the couch because the firm surface is better for his back after two back surgeries. I feel like we don’t communicate. I miss the man I met 8 years ago. I want an honest marriage. I want to be confident when I leave our kids home with him that he isn’t secretly taking medication that may make him drowsy. I don’t know what to do so I’m doing nothing and just coming to God in prayer. Please pray with me.
