Seeking- please help

[HopeHT]

Hello everyone

I’m completely new to this Plattform but I wanted to give it a try and reach out to you.
Because I honestly don’t know where to seek advice. To understand all, I have to get a little in the past.

I was raised in a Christian household but my parents weren’t really living by the word of god. They were not like the other people going every Sunday to church. I also got baptized at the age of 6 and not as a baby. Due to several very painful things I’ve been through, as I got older I denied God more and more. At the age of 15 I wanted to commit suicide. And then like a miracle happened and it didn’t work. So I accepted it , I did resist it but I had obviously no choice. It was like it’s not time yet and I can’t go now. However at that time I was still young, had no guidance and was completely overwhelmed by my emotions and couldn’t think clearly. As years has passed I still kinda denied what had happened and of course Gods presence. I was very angry with him for all the bad things that happen (not just in my life but in general) and I couldn’t grasp a lot of things back then.

Today I’m 29 years old and i somehow, by „accident“ searched for God. Now there’s absolutely NO SHADOW OF A DOUBT that God does exist. I never heard him (unlike what other people are telling) but I felt him. I still really can’t explain how it all started cause I’m not surely aware of it but it started kinda with a song for god. It was a language I didn’t understand but as I was listening to it I began to utterly cry, couldn’t control myself anymore and was overwhelmed. And every time I sing this song in this foreign language I can’t even speak, I always cry. But it’s a different crying than when I’m sad.

However long story short, through this I started to go after the urge an seek for god.
Every time I prayed I also cried, and I’m sure he did hear me and he was there. And he already helped me, without me even asking for his help.
The thing is, due to all that I’ve done and the fact that I denied him for so long, and was such a bad child, im ashamed. And I feel like I’m not worth even his attention. I’m struggling so hard and I don’t know what to do and how.

Even when I pray, I first of all apologize to God that I don’t even know how to pray properly and every time I also apologize to him and ask for his forgiveness for my denial.

I tried to read the Bible but to be honest there are too many times where i absolutely DONT understand what it should mean.

Since I’m new to this, I literally have NO idea what I should do and how I should do it: praying, living the life God wants me to, how to connect to Jesus, how to overcome all the bad things that has been planted into my brain from the devil, etc.

A few days ago I asked him to hear his voice at least once, but now I don’t even need that anymore. I do know that he’s here and that he’s watching me.

I today even started to yell at the devil because he’s been trying to deceive me again and I literally FELT him being proud of me.

Still I have this doubts that I’m no good for him and that I have to change a lot for him , to be able to walk the path he put me in.


Can please someone help me? I’m so overwhelmed and confused.

I thank all of you for your time, help and support.

Blessed be your day❤️

 

[Maria Billingsley]

Hello everyone

I’m completely new to this Plattform but I wanted to give it a try and reach out to you.
Because I honestly don’t know where to seek advice. To understand all, I have to get a little in the past.

I was raised in a Christian household but my parents weren’t really living by the word of god. They were not like the other people going every Sunday to church. I also got baptized at the age of 6 and not as a baby. Due to several very painful things I’ve been through, as I got older I denied God more and more. At the age of 15 I wanted to commit suicide. And then like a miracle happened and it didn’t work. So I accepted it , I did resist it but I had obviously no choice. It was like it’s not time yet and I can’t go now. However at that time I was still young, had no guidance and was completely overwhelmed by my emotions and couldn’t think clearly. As years has passed I still kinda denied what had happened and of course Gods presence. I was very angry with him for all the bad things that happen (not just in my life but in general) and I couldn’t grasp a lot of things back then.

Today I’m 29 years old and i somehow, by „accident“ searched for God. Now there’s absolutely NO SHADOW OF A DOUBT that God does exist. I never heard him (unlike what other people are telling) but I felt him. I still really can’t explain how it all started cause I’m not surely aware of it but it started kinda with a song for god. It was a language I didn’t understand but as I was listening to it I began to utterly cry, couldn’t control myself anymore and was overwhelmed. And every time I sing this song in this foreign language I can’t even speak, I always cry. But it’s a different crying than when I’m sad.

However long story short, through this I started to go after the urge an seek for god.
Every time I prayed I also cried, and I’m sure he did hear me and he was there. And he already helped me, without me even asking for his help.
The thing is, due to all that I’ve done and the fact that I denied him for so long, and was such a bad child, im ashamed. And I feel like I’m not worth even his attention. I’m struggling so hard and I don’t know what to do and how.

Even when I pray, I first of all apologize to God that I don’t even know how to pray properly and every time I also apologize to him and ask for his forgiveness for my denial.

I tried to read the Bible but to be honest there are too many times where i absolutely DONT understand what it should mean.

Since I’m new to this, I literally have NO idea what I should do and how I should do it: praying, living the life God wants me to, how to connect to Jesus, how to overcome all the bad things that has been planted into my brain from the devil, etc.

A few days ago I asked him to hear his voice at least once, but now I don’t even need that anymore. I do know that he’s here and that he’s watching me.

I today even started to yell at the devil because he’s been trying to deceive me again and I literally FELT him being proud of me.

Still I have this doubts that I’m no good for him and that I have to change a lot for him , to be able to walk the path he put me in.


Can please someone help me? I’m so overwhelmed and confused.

I thank all of you for your time, help and support.

Blessed be your day❤️

Have you received His Holy Spirit?

 

[HopeHT]

Have you received His Holy Spirit?

I don’t know. How should I know? How do i notice?

 

[HopeHT]

Have you received His Holy Spirit?

I don’t know. How should I know? How do i notice?

 

[Maria Billingsley]

I don’t know. How should I know? How do i notice?

You will know when you receive. Ask Him to fill you today with all love and humbleness. Repent from doubt. It is your love for Him that will lift what is now quenching His work in you, doubt. I pray you receive Him today.

 

[HopeHT]

You will know when you receive. Ask Him to fill you today with all love and humbleness. Repent from doubt. It is your love for Him that will lift what is now quenching His work in you, doubt. I pray you receive Him today.

Thanks for your kind words and that you pray for me.

As I read your question I’ve got something like a thought that said „yes you have“.

But my doubt is in my human flesh I cannot tell for sure if it’s only my thoughts speaking because I yearn for it and wish it to happen or if it’s really the Holy Spirit trying to get through.

And the shivers and sweats I get when I’m praying, I tell myself that it has to be the Holy Spirit but that’s what I mean by I’m not sure because maybe this happens because I WANT it to be the Holy Spirit.

Sincerely,

Thank you

 

[HopeHT]

You will know when you receive. Ask Him to fill you today with all love and humbleness. Repent from doubt. It is your love for Him that will lift what is now quenching His work in you, doubt. I pray you receive Him today.

How do I repent from doubt?

 

[Maria Billingsley]

How do I repent from doubt?

Repent means " change your mind".

 

[Richard T]

First off, you can be sure he accepts you. Not just only fully accepted but excitedly too. God talks about how important finding the one lost sheep is here.
Matthew 18:12-14 (NASB)
12 "What do you think? If any man has a hundred sheep, and one of them has gone astray, does he not leave the ninety-nine on the mountains and go and search for the one that is straying?
13 "If it turns out that he finds it, truly I say to you, he rejoices over it more than over the ninety-nine which have not gone astray.
14 "So it is not the will of your Father who is in heaven that one of these little ones perish.

Somehow God finally reached through to you and your resistance crumbled. From your younger days up until now, He had a plan. He kept you alive and now you are not only reconciled to God, but you, like every Christian are an important part of the body of Christ (body of Christ = all believers).

Salvation basically boils down to faith. I think you have it, but here it is from the bible. You confess Jesus as your Lord, meaning turning your life over to Him and His will, and you believe in your heart that God raised Jesus from the dead. The raising seems obvious because your experiences show that God is real and is living. You will learn more about what that means but it includes a belief that Jesus can take all your sins and the sin nature that came on mankind when Adam and Eve ate the apple in the garden of Eden.

Your instincts about the devil and God seem very good and the Holy Spirit now is your teacher. I pray you always rely on God's word and the Holy Spirit to move forward. God will bring people along to help you and you too will be able to help others. When Jesus is your Lord, know that everything is new.

Romans 10:8-11 (NASB) 8 But what does it say? "THE WORD IS NEAR YOU, IN YOUR MOUTH AND IN YOUR HEART"—that is, the word of faith which we are preaching,
9 that if you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved;
10 for with the heart a person believes, resulting in righteousness, and with the mouth he confesses, resulting in salvation.
11 For the Scripture says, "WHOEVER BELIEVES IN HIM WILL NOT BE DISAPPOINTED."

II Cor 5:17 KJV Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.

Enjoy that newness if you have given your heart to God. I believe you already have Jesus but others and yourself maybe too, might want to be more formal with perhaps a confession in front of another believer. Be careful though to not get bogged down in traditions and all kinds of hoops to go through like some churches make. God changing and calling your heart all those years is the key, not formalities.

God bless you always!

 

[Pop D.]

A good place to start learning is listening to sermons from a Spirit-filled pastor. I'd recommend Charles Stanley myself:

 

[Lukaris]

Do your best to live life by the Lord’s commandments. It is faithful, reasonable, & rational in to use these as they guide our conscience in our actions ( see John 14:15-18, Matthew 19:16-19, Romans 13:8-10, 1 Timothy 1:5 etc.). Whatever charity a person can do with a good heart ( Matthew 6:1-4). Next is prayer, say the Lord’s Prayer as sincere as possible ( it is for ourselves and for everyone around us as we pray it) see Matthew 6:5-13. Just let things happen. See also Ephesians 2:8-10.

As far as reading the Bible, I would concentrate on the New Testament before reading the Old Testament. The Old Testament is often quoted in the New & most Bibles have a cross reference (that is a good way to get a sense of familiarity). I would begin by reading the 1st chapter of Paul’s letter to Colossians ( Colossians 1:1-29 and then the Gospel of John). Also read the Lord’s great commandments ( Matthew 22:36-40, & Matthew 7:12 & then read Matthew 7:1-12 going full circle there). Note the highest commandments are an actual summary of the law & prophets of the Old Testament as the Lord Himself says. Also read the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew 5, 6, & 7.

The old church creeds are also good for a basic explanation of Who God is. The Apostles Creed is brief & to the point

Apostles' Creed

www.crcna.org

 

[HopeHT]

First off, you can be sure he accepts you. Not just only fully accepted but excitedly too. God talks about how important finding the one lost sheep is here.
Matthew 18:12-14 (NASB)
12 "What do you think? If any man has a hundred sheep, and one of them has gone astray, does he not leave the ninety-nine on the mountains and go and search for the one that is straying?
13 "If it turns out that he finds it, truly I say to you, he rejoices over it more than over the ninety-nine which have not gone astray.
14 "So it is not the will of your Father who is in heaven that one of these little ones perish.

Somehow God finally reached through to you and your resistance crumbled. From your younger days up until now, He had a plan. He kept you alive and now you are not only reconciled to God, but you, like every Christian are an important part of the body of Christ (body of Christ = all believers).

Salvation basically boils down to faith. I think you have it, but here it is from the bible. You confess Jesus as your Lord, meaning turning your life over to Him and His will, and you believe in your heart that God raised Jesus from the dead. The raising seems obvious because your experiences show that God is real and is living. You will learn more about what that means but it includes a belief that Jesus can take all your sins and the sin nature that came on mankind when Adam and Eve ate the apple in the garden of Eden.

Your instincts about the devil and God seem very good and the Holy Spirit now is your teacher. I pray you always rely on God's word and the Holy Spirit to move forward. God will bring people along to help you and you too will be able to help others. When Jesus is your Lord, know that everything is new.

Romans 10:8-11 (NASB) 8 But what does it say? "THE WORD IS NEAR YOU, IN YOUR MOUTH AND IN YOUR HEART"—that is, the word of faith which we are preaching,
9 that if you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved;
10 for with the heart a person believes, resulting in righteousness, and with the mouth he confesses, resulting in salvation.
11 For the Scripture says, "WHOEVER BELIEVES IN HIM WILL NOT BE DISAPPOINTED."

II Cor 5:17 KJV Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.

Enjoy that newness if you have given your heart to God. I believe you already have Jesus but others and yourself maybe too, might want to be more formal with perhaps a confession in front of another believer. Be careful though to not get bogged down in traditions and all kinds of hoops to go through like some churches make. God changing and calling your heart all those years is the key, not formalities.

God bless you always!

Thank you so much for this wonderful message it helped me a lot ❤️

God may bless you ❤️

 

[CoreyD]

Thanks for your kind words and that you pray for me.

As I read your question I’ve got something like a thought that said „yes you have“.

But my doubt is in my human flesh I cannot tell for sure if it’s only my thoughts speaking because I yearn for it and wish it to happen or if it’s really the Holy Spirit trying to get through.

And the shivers and sweats I get when I’m praying, I tell myself that it has to be the Holy Spirit but that’s what I mean by I’m not sure because maybe this happens because I WANT it to be the Holy Spirit.

Sincerely,

Thank you

I'm really glad to hear that you are searching.
I am glad too, that you realized God was there supporting you. He really is a true companion, looking to lift up the lowly one from the dirt.
He saw the good in you, as he did me.

I remember some persons - quite a number of people - telling me of their experience, in "holy spirit filled" churches.
They all said that everyone expected them to be like everyone else - "filled wih holy spirit", or "getting in the spirit", or "speaking in tongues" and so on.
Some of them so badly wanted to be like everyone - filled with holy spirit, so as to feel God's approval, that some of them believed it, and yes, some even "spoke in an unknown tongue".
It hurt me, and saddened me to hear how this left some of them feeling, after realizing they had only convinced themselves.

This is not a forum to debate or discuss this, but I did not receive holy spirit, and or speak in tongues, like the Christians in Acts, but like you, I knew God was supporting me, even though I did not know God.
I later came to know God, by doing what Jesus said at John 17:3.
Learning about God through his word the Bible, helped me to really understand God and his son, and to finally have a relationship with him, that is doubt free.

I came to appreciate why it was so important for Jesus to come to earth to minister, and to testify to the truth. Matthew 20:28; John 18:37
I also came to appreciate why in the three and a half years of his life, why he extended himself in preaching the good news and teaching, and why he chose disciples to carry on that work. Mark 1:14, 15; Luke 4:42-44; Luke 8:1; Luke 9:1-6; Luke 10:1-9
It made me realize how important the message of the kingdom of God is to people, and why it's so urgent to reach people of all nations with it. Matthew 28:19, 20; Matthew 24:14
This made me zealous in sharing the gospel with people, at every opportunity. Acts 17:16, 17
It has become somewhat of a lifeline for me, to God, as it reflects his love for people, and the desire for them to be saved. 1 Timothy 2:3, 4

If you really want that connection with Jesus, the scripture I referenced shows how he makes this available to you.
You can take your time reading them in the quiet of your home, and meditating on them.
I'd be happy to discuss them with you further, if you so desire.

How are your parents?

 

[Fish55]

In response to your question, Hi so glad for you that you are open to the gospel of Jesus Christ. you can read the 4 gospels of the New Testament and the New Testament of the Bible, and pray every morning for protection and peace. You can download a Bible reading plan from the internet. You can also read Genesis after reading the 4 gospels. have you said the sinner's prayer? How Do You Pray the Sinner's Prayer? Attend a Protestant church and join a cell group. There are worship music on youtube, eg.

The Christian's journey of faith is not a bed of roses. God has promised to be with you in the mountains and valleys of life. God bless you. Acts 2:38 English Standard Version 38 And Peter said to them, “Repent and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. This is an important verse in the Bible on how to be saved. Acts 2 :38 shows you how to be saved for heaven. First, turn from your sins (and mine too), next be baptised in the name of Jesus, and receive the Holy Spirit, who is the Spirit of God. God bless you.

 

[TGGIL]

It is difficult but not impossible to share your faith with another, but so close to God you will be. If you are single, wake up and smell God, taste him, hear him, see his love in everything. If you have a helpmate, someone to love, love that person as God would want you to love another. Love others with your heart for God. Let God be God and you listen more than speak. Love us all sounded to seek. The love of of the wind, the snow, the birds, your heart will follow that love with God. You are not confused nor lost. You are exactly where God wants all of us to be. You are an individual soul of love and your way, with God's way is your path. Take advice, read what you wish, as you receive it but only you know your heart with God. Just love inside you. Love yourself in your mirror as you look at God's crested lamb. Smile, your are doing just fine. Eat pleasantly, drink friendly, enjoy life as you discover love. TGGIL.

 

[JesusFollowerForever]

I don’t know. How should I know? How do i notice?

if you know God is watching you you have received the Holy spirit. that knowledge is from God. you are on the right path, follow the teachings of Jesus and do as he says. it is a difficult path but with faith in GOD you will overcome, it it a transformation process and takes time.

BLessings

 

[JesusFollowerForever]

How do I repent from doubt?

have faith in the Lord.

 

[JesusFollowerForever]

Thank you so much for this wonderful message it helped me a lot ❤️

God may bless you ❤️

Be careful of preachers , if they deviate from what Jesus teaches, they are assuredly wrong, first learn all the teachings of Jesus, from Mark Matt, John and Luke, not hard to do. What is hard is using discernment when listening to preachers.

 

[Daniel Marsh]

Hello everyone

I’m completely new to this Plattform but I wanted to give it a try and reach out to you.
Because I honestly don’t know where to seek advice. To understand all, I have to get a little in the past.

I was raised in a Christian household but my parents weren’t really living by the word of god. They were not like the other people going every Sunday to church. I also got baptized at the age of 6 and not as a baby. Due to several very painful things I’ve been through, as I got older I denied God more and more. At the age of 15 I wanted to commit suicide. And then like a miracle happened and it didn’t work. So I accepted it , I did resist it but I had obviously no choice. It was like it’s not time yet and I can’t go now. However at that time I was still young, had no guidance and was completely overwhelmed by my emotions and couldn’t think clearly. As years has passed I still kinda denied what had happened and of course Gods presence. I was very angry with him for all the bad things that happen (not just in my life but in general) and I couldn’t grasp a lot of things back then.

Today I’m 29 years old and i somehow, by „accident“ searched for God. Now there’s absolutely NO SHADOW OF A DOUBT that God does exist. I never heard him (unlike what other people are telling) but I felt him. I still really can’t explain how it all started cause I’m not surely aware of it but it started kinda with a song for god. It was a language I didn’t understand but as I was listening to it I began to utterly cry, couldn’t control myself anymore and was overwhelmed. And every time I sing this song in this foreign language I can’t even speak, I always cry. But it’s a different crying than when I’m sad.

However long story short, through this I started to go after the urge an seek for god.
Every time I prayed I also cried, and I’m sure he did hear me and he was there. And he already helped me, without me even asking for his help.
The thing is, due to all that I’ve done and the fact that I denied him for so long, and was such a bad child, im ashamed. And I feel like I’m not worth even his attention. I’m struggling so hard and I don’t know what to do and how.

Even when I pray, I first of all apologize to God that I don’t even know how to pray properly and every time I also apologize to him and ask for his forgiveness for my denial.

I tried to read the Bible but to be honest there are too many times where i absolutely DONT understand what it should mean.

Since I’m new to this, I literally have NO idea what I should do and how I should do it: praying, living the life God wants me to, how to connect to Jesus, how to overcome all the bad things that has been planted into my brain from the devil, etc.

A few days ago I asked him to hear his voice at least once, but now I don’t even need that anymore. I do know that he’s here and that he’s watching me.

I today even started to yell at the devil because he’s been trying to deceive me again and I literally FELT him being proud of me.

Still I have this doubts that I’m no good for him and that I have to change a lot for him , to be able to walk the path he put me in.


Can please someone help me? I’m so overwhelmed and confused.

I thank all of you for your time, help and support.

Blessed be your day❤️

Read ERV version or Good News translation. When you pray ask both Jesus and the Holy Spirit to pray with you Romans 8