Seeking Answers

[Knarf188]

Hey Hi everyone.... My name is Frank ( Knarf backwards =P).... anyways I come before you because I have a couple of questions.... Well first a little background information might help..... Recently my GF and I broke up... well actually she did the breakin and i did the krying =p... but anyways it was a relationship of bout 10 months, during which we were picking out kids names, kind of wedding, etc. I have never really had a relationship like this.... It was the greatest thing in the world... I gave her everything that i kould afford(and she always tried to decline).... I lived for her... she was my best friend.... anyways we moved down to tx with my family for the summer to get jobs. During the summer our fighting increased.... I always felt like she never truely loved me as much as I luved her which was the cause of most of our fights... and the fact that I am a very jealous/nontrusting guy (because i have been hurt before by women =P)..... anyways I was the first one to break it off with her and then I realized what an idiot I was and said that what i said was a mistake and BEGGED her back twice... both of which she declined... stating that she "needed her space and independence" (aka... I don't like you anymore) ... I was so heart broken how can someone who you spent so much time with and luved so much all of a sudden in a couple of weeks break off that luve... just lose it at the drop of a dime....
I mean we were both raised different... Her valuing friends and having a not so klose family relationship... me valuing my family with little or no friends except my family... so we were bound to fight... but in the end she just shut me out (how can u women do this, its amazing)... i tried talking to her twice (aim)... but she doesnt reply... I sent her parents a thankyou kard for all the help ( I live in Pa by myself going to college and her family made me feel like a part of hers)... and she has not even sent my parents one after promising to do so.... I kall that kold... there is alot more stuff that was done but i dont want to bore u... im sure u get the idea... I mean after the breakup and her not wanting me back... i said alot of mean things... and i apologized for not being the chrisitan man that i am... but still come on now.... have a heart and forgive and if u luve me lets work it out not just dump it out the window....
anyways after the breakup i realized that you know what, i was putting her before God... and thats not right... what a hard lesson =/... i wish he kould of like emailed me or somethin but not this.... anyways I now have devoted my life to Christ... I now understand what it means to be a Christian... i was never living my life for him... but now i kant stop thinking bout him... its nice... but thats just it... im not on fire.... im not filled with joy... i sing praises , i weep , i keep a journal, i read his word, i try to surround myself with his presence...
see the problem is My ex-gf says shes a Christian too... but she doesnt want to live her life for him... or at least not yet... you know like Saint Augustine (Go out and enjoy the world then later devote your life to him)... she says she is trying to walk with him but she is drinking and partying... things i dont think God would approve of... what happens ... Kan people actually do that... knowningly sin and then God will forgive them later in life? doesn't seem fair really... i probably would do the same thing but i dont want God to suffer ... for he weeps when we sin... I want to live my life for him... because of what he did for me... whether i am happy in life or not....
I know this is weird... but think of it this way... my dad and I are really klose... he loves to Golf... but i think its ok.... I just enjoy the time we spend together.... or fishing, He loves it ... but to me its ok... Now i think about God... He loves others/forgives others... i think its ok... you know what I mean... its hard to explain... I appreciate everything he has done for me... but i kant find that joy in Christ where I am shouting on the mountaintops... whats holding me back? I think its this jealousy of my ex getting away with sinning-coming back later to him... and also i dont think i have forgiven her... i pray for God to help me forgive her... but i see her sometimes and it just tears me apart... and the funny thing is if she would want me back i would take her in a heartbeat (sad isnt it?) ... But God would forgive anyone also too... i kind of relate what she did to me as what i have done to christ... to put him in the backburner and with this knowledge i have gained a friend... what i just dont know what i am missing ....it wouldnt be so bad if i found joy in christ... I mean dont get me wrong I do love him... and I do thank him... i would do anything for him... i just get down and depressed... well i hope this isnt too rambly/jumbled =P.... but any advice would greatly be appreciated ... thankyou ... take kare and God Bless =)....

Frank

 

[Stanfi]

Sin sepearates us from God. Your ex is not getting away with sinning. If she thinks she is, God will show her. If one is actually living for God, they will not habitually sin. My friend sin will not enter into heaven. God cannot look upon sin. When Jesus took the sin upon himself when he was on the cross, that's why the earth went dark. God cannot look upon sin.

You are suffering from heartbreak. Pray to God, ask him to help you. Forgive your girlfriend for the pain you feel. Put God first in your life, and ask him to help you. Live for God and he will supply your needs. It might not be an easy road but you can make it with the Lords help. He has a plan for you, you just have to trust in him.

 

[ZiSunka]

Men cry over broken relationships? That's a great revelation to me. Seriously. I honestly didn't think that men care that much about their relationships that they would feel like crying when one broke up.


The problem with living life anyway you want then getting saved later is that you don't have any idea how much time you have. You might die tomorrow, or even later today.

 

[Stanfi]

Men cry over broken relationships? That's a great revelation to me. Seriously. I honestly didn't think that men care that much about their relationships that they would feel like crying when one broke up.

lambslove,

Not all men are pigs. If a man has a great lady in his life, and truly respects her, and values her companionship, and truly feels in his heart that that lady is a blessing from God. When that relationship ends, it is very devastating. Trust me!!! Men need great women in their lives, just as much as women need great men in their lives. It really aggravates me when I see these guys with these great women in their lives and they treat them like dirt. I keep thinking..God has blessed you beyond measure and you don't even realize it.

Sorry, this is a subject I can get bent out of shape on. Maybe I'm just different.

 

[ZiSunka]

lambslove,

Not all men are pigs. If a man has a great lady in his life, and truly respects her, and values her companionship, and truly feels in his heart that that lady is a blessing from God. When that relationship ends, it is very devastating. Trust me!!! Men need great women in their lives, just as much as women need great men in their lives. It really aggravates me when I see these guys with these great women in their lives and they treat them like dirt. I keep thinking..God has blessed you beyond measure and you don't even realize it.

Sorry, this is a subject I can get bent out of shape on. Maybe I'm just different.

I wasn't meaning to criticize, I was just surprised. I've never seen a man right after he broke up with someone, and men tend to be so unemotional, I just never expected that there would be tears, or feelings of any sort except relief. Thanks for educating me.

 

[Knarf188]

Hey thanx for everything guys... Yea im a man *cough cough*... but i did kry... and I KNOW EXactly what you mean how the bums get the kind gurls... its depressing... now ive been reading matthew and in Matthew 24:45-51 it talks about the Faithful Servant and the Evil Servant... and i think maybe it translates to the good servant being a Christian serving Christ always and the Evil servant knowing christ but knowningly will ask for forgiveness later... if so then that means that if you believe in Christ though dont serve him wholeheartedly then maybe you wont inherit Heaven... any thoughts??? I'm really hung up on this question will a person who believes in Christ but will seek forgiveness later will they inherit heaven??? Because I don't want my gf goin to Hell.... so maybe I kan help but if this translation is wack =P... then I wont bother.... Any help would be grateful =).... Peace and God Bless

Frank

 

[Stanfi]

I wasn't meaning to criticize, I was just surprised. I've never seen a man right after he broke up with someone, and men tend to be so unemotional, I just never expected that there would be tears, or feelings of any sort except relief. Thanks for educating me.

Well lambslove this is interesting. It is usually you educating me.

 

[SamoanOnion]

watsup knarf,

here are my thoughts on your questions, its a tuffie, good question...

the thing about salvation is, if one has truly, and the key word is truly, accepted Jesus as there Lord and Saviour, then nothing can take that away from Him. once you are saved, you are saved, and once you are forgiven, you are forgiven for ALL of your sins (past, present, future), otherwise, everytime we sin, we'd have to, in a sense, be born again every time as well. there are tons of scripture that states about your slavation, and if you were able to lose it, even though one continues to sin, then that make God's promise to us a lie.

But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. ROMANS 5:8

For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—not by works, so that no one can boast. EPHESIANS 2:8–9

Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God—children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband’s will, but born of God. JOHN 1:12–13

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. JOHN 3:16

And I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; neither shall anyone snatch them out of My hand. My Father, who has given them to Me, is greater than all; and no one is able to snatch them out of My Father's hand. JOHN 10:28-29

I feel that if a person who is saved continues to sin, God will deal with them in there life in His own way, I do believe that if it is an extreme case, and that person is of no use to Him (we still have our own will), than His only option is to take that person away (death), for one, so that person doesn't continue to damage themselves and the ones around them, and two, He still keeps his promise to us. as believers, God has a path set for everyone, whether you choose to get there the easy way by submitting to His will or the hard way and long way, by doing as you please (like your friend), either way, you will get there.

some folks, when they became saved, it took them to hit the bottom to open there eyes, and for some folks, it'll take hitting bottom again to get them back on the right path. anyways, enought blah blah blah from me, hope this helps.