Scared...

[amazed_by_grace]

Last year I started using anorexia as a form of self harm cause I hated my body so much.. I would eat jus half a bagel a day and drink loads of water to fill me up and I dropped over a stone in about a month... it was really crazy... now I'm scared that I'm gonna start again cause I'm so stressed out and I feel depressed and alone and hate my body... I've started using my retainer as an excuse not to eat (sounds pathetic I know). I have to keep it in when I eat so I always need to brush my teeth afterwards so now thats its the holidays I go out alot and I never eat. I say that I can't cause I don't have a toothbrush with me. Then I get depressed and eat a load of potato chips or ice cream but I don't throw it up I just don't eat for ages afterwards to 'make up for it'.. I'm really scared that I'm going to get badly anorexic again cause I'm trying to heal from all the bad stuff in my life but it feels like no one wants to listen... :-( I'm really scared..

 

[beetlequeendiva]

Honey - to be blunt about it, take your own advice!!! You just replied to my post - take your advice to me and use it!!! Also if you want to talk PM me, sometimes it's good to talk with people who understand, I am trying to heal from all the bad stuff in my life too!!!

 

[WhereareyouGod?]

I will happily listen if you want to talk, i will give you any advice i possibly can, try to eat little and often, that way your body will get used to having food and that should make it easier

Love n Hugs

Lizzie

 

[chaelsworld0o]

I know how that is to be scared in area like this. You don't want to be that badly off but then again you almost or just can't help it! I want to encourage you to take the mindset of "I want to get better". So many times it happens where we say we want to get better because we're scared but we really don't. But if you really do, let that be your modivation. If you're determined, you will get better but if you're not, you're just setting yourself up for failure. I totally understand though... and it sucks to be stuck with an eating disorder especially when it goes too far... but i'm praying for you and just remember that if you ever need someone else to talk to, i'm here. --rachael

 

[amazed_by_grace]

thanks guys... I'm doing okay.. had two meals yesterday... which is great...

 

[beetlequeendiva]

Oh that's really great!!!!!!! I'm glad you're doing okay

 

[WhereareyouGod?]

yay well done!

 

[Leta]

I'm glad you are starting to do better!
Keep it up amazed !!!!
God Bless,
Saleta

 

[amazed_by_grace]

I've taken another step forward... I was overeating for a day or two and then I went back to starving myself but now I have two meals each day of brown bread, cheese and a vitamin pop... hopefully thats keeping me healthy enough...hopefully.. thank you all for your encouragement...

 

[amazed_by_grace]

The Lord gave me the strength to step forward and ask someone in my church for councelling for my ED, self harm and depression. Praise God! I pray that it will go well...

 

[Leta]

GOD FOR YOU AMAZED!!!!!
Love ya,
Saleta