Same house ... new spouse. Would you do it?

[AirForceTeacher]

I am having some difficulty with some weird feelings. I still own one of the houses I lived in with my ex-wife - it's in another state, rented out. I intend to retire from the Air Force in the very near future, and my gf and I will probably be married and moving back to the city my house is in at that time. I'm a little weirded out at the thought of living in that house again with someone else - it seems almost disrespectful to a new wife.

Would you live again in the same house, or sleep in the same bedroom?

 

[Autumnleaf]

No way. Not ever. Never.

 

[mkgal1]

How does your g/f feel about it? Maybe if she paints it and decorates it, it won't even seem like the same room (?)

 

[AirForceTeacher]

Not comfortable with it. She's already said she wants to repaint the whole house, but even then she's very uncomfortable about sleeping in the same room unless we gut it and change the floor plan. The more and more I think about it, thr more I think it's going on the market as soon as the current tenant is out, but tax consequences may prevent that for a while.

 

[McScribe]

I'd pray about it and declare in the name of Jesus that any emotional/spiritual strongholds would be broken, and declare it to belong to a new relationship, a new marriage, a new time.

 

[mkgal1]

Not comfortable with it. She's already said she wants to repaint the whole house, but even then she's very uncomfortable about sleeping in the same room unless we gut it and change the floor plan. The more and more I think about it, thr more I think it's going on the market as soon as the current tenant is out, but tax consequences may prevent that for a while.

If she is so uncomfortable, then I feel that it would be a way to show her you cherish her by finding another home to live in together.

With home prices down everywhere now, maybe it would be a good opportunity to sell and find another place since the tax consequences would probably be less in this market (?). I don't know much about that though.

 

[dbhost]

I bought my house little more than a year before my ex walked out and left me upside down with it. The wife God has blessed me with now is not only very understanding, but appreciative of the home, and it is HER house. Now mind you, almost nothing is the way it was when my ex was around. New paint, flooring going on, decorated top to bottom etc...

I would talk the issue over extensively with your bride to be, and make sure she is good with it. Houses are awfully expensive, and you don't want her in a house she hates because of its history...

 

[porterross]

Doing something that could hurt you financially for emotional reasons wouldn't be good, would it? Keeping it as rental property until it's more feasible to sell shouldn't count against you should you consider buying something else in the same town. Look at it as an investment and focus on the good that can come from the pain it holds for you when it's sold. The profits from doing that at the right time could help the two of you acquire your dream home in the future.

 

[AirForceTeacher]

Oh, it's current;y rented, and will stay that way for a while. I not likely to be moving back until end of next year, but the topic's come up now because we're planning. I can probably keep it rented after I move and just find another place.

 

[dorig59]

I am having some difficulty with some weird feelings. I still own one of the houses I lived in with my ex-wife - it's in another state, rented out. I intend to retire from the Air Force in the very near future, and my gf and I will probably be married and moving back to the city my house is in at that time. I'm a little weirded out at the thought of living in that house again with someone else - it seems almost disrespectful to a new wife.

Would you live again in the same house, or sleep in the same bedroom?

Well, what does your girlfriend think about it? I'd say it should be up to her, really. It's a bit weird to my way of thinking, but sometimes you have to be practical....just for a little while. I don't know, let her decide.

 

[Romanseight2005]

Yeah, if you and your gf are both uncomfortable with it, then simply find a way to get a new place. It sounds like renting it out is easy enough, so maybe the renter will want to buy. If not, then keep renting it out. If it were an absolute impossibility, and you had to move in, then let your gf remodel her heart out, you know make it hers.

 

[janman345]

If you do enough remodeling its not a big deal, money is tight in this economy and flipping a house over for thoes kinds of reasons is very expensive and may not even be possible in this economy.

I have the same house that I had with an ex wife and have a new wife, it was convient that the old appliaces were like almost 30 years old so I just gutted the kitchen and one of the bathrooms planted new grass rearranged furnature, threw out numerous contractor bags of random crap.