Ring Talk!

[somethingBEAUTIFUL]

So, my boyfriend and I have been talking about marriage a good bit as of recently, especially in the last month or so. Today he told me how his mom showed him a ring yesterday. He said it is a family ring, and she asked if he thought I'd like it as an engagement ring. He told her, "Well, she's both practical and sentimental, so it's possible. Sometimes though I think she might would like something a little extravagent, and other times I think she'd take a gumball-machine ring!" I laughed along with him about the last part, but then told him that I trust his ability to choose one. He said thanks, and then I told him that I'm looking forward to that special day, but I also am happy with the progression of our relationship. We've just crossed the one-year mark, so it's not as if a proposal is overdue or anything.

Does anyone think he could have been asking in an indirect way about my ring preference(s), though? Just something to ponder!

 

[PetLuv]

It might be; jewelery is a fairly personal thing. Is there a reason you two aren't looking together?

 

[somethingBEAUTIFUL]

It might be; jewelery is a fairly personal thing. Is there a reason you two aren't looking together?

Yeah, it is. I don't suppose there's a specific reason as to why we aren't looking together; it just hasn't come up. I thought he might like to initiate that himself, too.

 

[somethingBEAUTIFUL]

Tonight we talked some more about rings and getting engaged. Apparently he would really like to give me the heirloom ring. He told me it is VERY nice. However, I asked what the color of the band is, and he told me yellow gold. I do not prefer and very rarely wear yellow gold. When I reminded him of this, he seemed disappointed. I told him I didn't want to hurt his feelings at all, just that I have preferences. He said he understood, but that he thought the yellow gold would look nice on me. I don't know the total significance of this ring, and I feel a little bad about saying that I would like white gold or platinum instead. Did I do the right thing, speaking up about my preferences...should I email him links of what I like...should I take the heirloom ring? Thanks in advance for the help!

 

[Nerd Girl Supreme]

I dunno. Guys are usually pretty cruddy at subtle hints (we've all heard the "you have to hit 'em over the head with stuff for it to sink in" lines) so he MAY have been trying to be sneaky, or he may have been just relating a fun story about his mom. Guys CAN be romantic and plot surprises when they put their minds to it... but I don't think it's generally in their nature lol. As for the proposal and whether it's overdue... you're almost 30, and you've been together over a year? Ummm... it's definitely "grow up and get married" time

 

[Nerd Girl Supreme]

Tonight we talked some more about rings and getting engaged. Apparently he would really like to give me the heirloom ring. He told me it is VERY nice. However, I asked what the color of the band is, and he told me yellow gold. I do not prefer and very rarely wear yellow gold. When I reminded him of this, he seemed disappointed. I told him I didn't want to hurt his feelings at all, just that I have preferences. He said he understood, but that he thought the yellow gold would look nice on me. I don't know the total significance of this ring, and I feel a little bad about saying that I would like white gold or platinum instead. Did I do the right thing, speaking up about my preferences...should I email him links of what I like...should I take the heirloom ring? Thanks in advance for the help!

If this proposal is for YOU... his beloved wife-to-be... then the only preference that should matter to him is yours! Not his, not his mom's. It's your ring, it's going to be on your hand, and you aren't shallow or demanding or nitpicky to want to like your own engagement ring Now, if you go all Bridezilla and start demanding something that costs three months' salary... I might rescind all that

FTR I don't like yellow gold, either. I NEVER wear it.

 

[California Dreamin']

I sent links of ones I like.

 

[iambren]

Why don't you just go out and buy your own ring, give it to him and he can use it to propose to you. It's been funny watching your progression over time, as if you always have your thumb in this guy's back.

Are you sure you/he want to live this way the rest of your life?

 

[CounselorForChrist]

Engagement ring wise its good to have SOME sort of idea of what she likes. Its why I looked through many pictures of my fiance on her FB page and figured out what kind of jewelry she like and what she didn't. She doesn't seem to care for gold or anything over fancy. But she does like a hint of still being nice looking and yet simple at the same time.

I never got to get her an engagement ring since we have a LDR. So when it came time to buy a wedding ring a few weeks ago I searched at Amazon and narrowed it down to one ring. THen because we are getting married I showed her it to see what she thought and to see if she may want something else. Upon her seeing it her heart skipped a beat and she said she couldn't believe I knew exactly what type she would want. SHe was blown away.

Well men have the stereotype of being "duh" to a womans wants or how she thinks. I am not that bad lol. For those duh type of men though give them hints. Here is the wedding rings we are using:

I post these because when you get to the time of marriage make sure you realize there are MANY types or rings out there and sterling silver doesn't hold up well in the heat. Get something like tungsten or titanium.

 

[somethingBEAUTIFUL]

Why don't you just go out and buy your own ring, give it to him and he can use it to propose to you. It's been funny watching your progression over time, as if you always have your thumb in this guy's back.

Are you sure you/he want to live this way the rest of your life?

You may be getting my current boyfriend, whom I've been with for 14 months, confused with my ex who I was with 4 years.

Anyhow, just a few days after I made the original post, J went and bought a white gold set. I was impressed he got the wedding band as well. I haven't seen them (don't want to either yet), and I've no idea when he will propose.