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Repenting for Watching Porn

Discussion in 'One Bread, One Body - Catholic' started by Remy.M., May 17, 2021.

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  1. Remy.M.

    Remy.M. New Member

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    I'm a teenager. I have never done anything sexual by myself or with others since I'm repulsed by it, but I read a pornographic comic which lead to watching a lot of porn today. Ive wanted to become closer to God for a while but haven't really changed any of my habits, but this really made me feel like I have to repent.
    I looked up sins involved (sloth, greed, lust, and others), and I feel bad for them. I never intend on watching porn ever again in my entire life.
    I'm having trouble trying to repent, however, because I don't fully regret doing it. It's affirmed my repulsion to sex and makes me more comfortable with abstaining (I saw what sex actually was, not the romantization society presents). I know I should have just trusted God and myself, but I feel better knowing for certain.
    It's hard for me to regret what I did because I felt like I've grown as a person from my mistake.
    What should I do?
     
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  2. Michie

    Michie Human rights begin in the womb. Supporter

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    All you have to do is repent and try to stay on the narrow path. Live and learn.
     
  3. Fenwick

    Fenwick ☩ Broman Catholic ☩

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    Welp, confession is the where you start. Have you considered asking a priest about deliverance healing? I'm about to start it myself and from what I understand it's helpful and important work to be done if we struggle with a particular sin.
     
  4. Remy.M.

    Remy.M. New Member

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    I mean: how can I repent if I don't regret what I've done? (Im glad since I learned from my mistake) Or am I wrong about how to repent?
    I'm considering it, but I'm unsure of what exactly to say, to do and when. I've always felt a little weird about the idea of confession, but I suppose that may arise from the lack of understanding of it.
     
  5. Humble_Disciple

    Humble_Disciple Member

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    If you're a practicing Catholic, shouldn't you be discussing these things with a priest?
     
  6. chevyontheriver

    chevyontheriver Well-Known Member Supporter

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    The hardest part about confession is finding the courage to actually get to confession. That part is not easy. It's easy from that point on though. You can say you are not practiced at how to make a confession and the priest will walk you through the whole thing. And once it's over you will feel really good.

    What you need is a firm purpose to not engage in that sin again. We all fail but give it a very solid try to resist. The grace provided by the sacrament will assist you.

    I noticed a very negative attitude about sex in your earlier posts. Sex is good. It has a place though, and that is between one man and one woman who have committed their lives to each other. Sex outside of that is only a caricature of what it should be. Work on forming a positive understanding of sex. The world is FULL of examples of sex done wrong for you to follow. Look to Catholic teaching for sex the right way. Not lame priests who won't follow the teaching and are sometimes terrible examples, but the teaching itself. That teaching is a clear 'yes' to sex if done in it's proper context in marriage.
     
  7. Michie

    Michie Human rights begin in the womb. Supporter

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    It sounds like you are in the process of repenting to me. You have resolved to avoid it but you recognize that realization by experiencing your mistake. You learned from it and it gave you clarity. Discuss it with your priest.
     
  8. Unqualified

    Unqualified Well-Known Member

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    Pornography is an addiction. Chemicals in your brain are produced. It happens by continued use of it. Quit while your ahead. Use the filters on you computer or parental controls.
    Abstinence is a good thing and good for character building. Learn, get the strength to resist. Many human problems ar caused by not waiting for mairrage to both men and women. Take your time and grow and mature. Marriage is good if you are with the right person.

    Sex is the norm, but some have the gift of going without. Don’t be a priest or a brother it unnatural and they have many problems later in life. This world is sex crazy and so many people some have turned to abstinence and the Lord. The Bible says you can serve Him better single. I wanted that gift when younger. Asked him to take my sex drive too. He said the single life is better- for some. Try serving the poor in st Vincent de Paul or Salvation Army. Lay ministry to obey Gods word is good.
     
  9. disciple Clint

    disciple Clint Well-Known Member

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    You said "(I saw what sex actually was, not the romantization society presents)" I want you to understand that you saw what lust is all about. There is no love in lust and porn is pure lust. Married people love each other, when they have sex it is tender, considerate, loving, giving, caring, elevating. It is healthy as God designed sex to be, please do not think that what you saw is what sex is about.
     
  10. chevyontheriver

    chevyontheriver Well-Known Member Supporter

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    So far so good. Pornography does mess with a person's brain chemistry. Even a little bit. The cumulative effect is terrible on a human brain. Even the 'soft' stuff. So avoid it.

    Your next paragraph is problematical. I almost reported your post because it is so flawed. But I wanted to offer a correction rather than just have your post removed.
    This is true. Some do have the gift of celibacy
    But here is where you run into trouble.
    The above is wrong because some people really do have the gift of celibacy and for them they can live a celibate life without problems. Same for religious sisters. Some can do it. Some can't. What is necessary is a long discernment to see if such a life works for you or does not work for you. If you don't have the gift but you try anyway it can be a problem. It shows up as sexual abuse or a failed ministry or a priest wallowing in porn. THAT is unnatural. But some people, with care and control, are happy and fulfilled and celibate. Being a priest or brother or sister is not unnatural for them. It is one of the ways they fulfill their vocations in life. Celibacy is OK for those called to it. For those not called it is dangerous.
    Turning to abstinence and turning to the Lord are two different things. Turning to the Lord one should turn away from sin, and thus from every sexual sin such as looking at porn or any other kind of sexual sin. But becoming asexual is not the goal of the Christian life. Ordering your Christian life to have a healthy sexuality is one of the goals of the Christian life. So a temporary abstinence can be a good thing for most people who are called to marry and have children. Not a permanent abstinence. You were not clear about that. The overarching word is a very 'old-fashioned' word, and that is chastity. Chastity before marriage means abstaining from sex. But also forming a healthy sexuality in preparation for marriage. Chastity in marriage means plenty of sex, but healthy, self giving, exclusive, committed, respecting fertility and potency.
    And yet does not condemn marriage.
    It is better for some. Not for even the majority though. What is necessary is to develop a sexuality appropriate to your calling, with temperance and modesty and purity appropriate to one's age and one;s calling. Sex is not bad. It is not the Christian message to say that sex is bad. It is good. A good that needs to be properly indulged by waiting before marriage and always with chastity if one is young, if one is called to celibacy, or if one is called to marriage. We are not promoting the Junior Anti-Sex League from the book 1984. Julia in that book was a walking hypocrisy. If anything Christianity, and Catholicism in particular, teaches a pro-sexual message that the world cannot handle. Some of our priests and bishops and cardinals can't even handle it. But the teaching is true.
    This is actually good advice. Helping others is a good curative for too much concern about one's self. And it can help in building a healthy sexuality because a healthy sexuality is about service. An unhealthy sexuality is all about self-indulgence, about using others. Pornography is about using others, not caring for their persons, but using their images to obtain a psycho-chemical high all by one's self. Service to others is kind of the opposite.

    To summarize then: A life of chastity is the goal. And that is a life that forms a healthy sexuality. We either develop that or we are on the way to living a train wreck. Some of us are called to celibacy and that is good for us. Most of us are called to marriage and family, and that is good for us. Pornography does not help, and only hurts in our development of a healthy sexuality. Every sexual sin hurts us.
     
  11. Fenwick

    Fenwick ☩ Broman Catholic ☩

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    Check out the book Unbound. I haven't read it myself yet, but my fiancée swears by it. It's not perfect, the author (Neal Lozano) is Catholic but he wrote the book to appeal to a wider Christian audience. As a result he overlooks the value that the sacraments play in deliverance. At any rate, I suggest checking out that book and then maybe seeking out a priest who is willing to help you go through what the book details. I think it's an important process to undertake if we want to get past habitual sins, even if maybe we don't feel regret for them.

    My fiancée has read it already, and she and I are both going through deliverance with separate priests. They both advised that it be done with a priest, not alone or with a layman, a priest is equipped to know and understand this process and as ordained men of God they actually possess the faculties to properly engage in this.
     
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