Renewal of the Mind-Daily Readings

[If Not For Grace]

There is a void in our lives from the beginning that we must Fill-some choose to rely on Alcohol, Drugs, Sex, Work, Sports, Gambling, Food--when none of these work. . . we try harder moving to extremes and fall into addiction-our thinking becomes distorted and unreasonable...

Only God is sufficient to restore us to sanity and fill our Void.

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

EGO

E.G.O. = Edge God Out

Ego can be one tough customer. It generally fights this business of recovery and a Higher Power tooth and nail. It can cry like a baby and tell us how much care it needs. It can scream like a pouting teenager demanding that we leave it alone. It can romance us like a long-lost lover seducing us into sleep.

The ego can take on many disguises to get its own way. It wants no competition for affection. When we were caught up in our disease, the ego and the drugs and alcohol met up and made an unholy alliance against us. The disease told the ego what it wanted to hear, and the ego fed the disease its poison.

My ego must be cut down to size. This will help stop my disease from doing further damage to my life. My ego will never provide serenity, only endless demand. Only my Higher Power, the Program, and my friends can end this war within me.

 

[If Not For Grace]

~ KEEP IT SIMPLE ~ (Daily Meditations for Twelve-Step Beginnings and Renewal) ~

God is not a cosmic bellboy.

~ Harry Emerson Fosdick ~

We have to laugh when we look back at the times we treated God like our servant. Who did we think we were, ordering God to do something for us? But we got away with it. God even did some of the things we asked.

Now we know that our Higher Power is not a servant. As we work the Steps, we know we don’t give orders to our Higher Power. We don’t expect God to work miracles every time we’d like one. We’re asking our Higher Power to lead us. After all, who knows what is best for us—our Higher Power or us?

Our Higher Power has many wonderful gifts for us. Our Higher Power will show us goals, help us live in love and joy, and give us strength.

Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, show me ways to help others as You’ve helped me. I’m grateful that You love me and help me.

Action for the Day

Today, I’ll make a list of times my Higher Power has helped me out of trouble.

 

[If Not For Grace]

Support from for the Void Theory-from the ESH of another

From "Don't Die for Love"

You. You’re hurting. It’s like there’s this hole in your heart. You want to be happy, but nothing seems to fill that hole. You’ve tried everything but nothing has worked, and that hole remains so cold and empty.

You can keep searching, you can keep trying, but there’s only one way to fill that hole. That hole is God-sized. Only God can fill that empty space inside you. He can give you happiness, peace of mind, He can take care of your problems and worries, He can give you health, He can give you life.

Jesus doesn’t tie you down with a bunch of rules to keep, He takes the chains you already wear and crushes them under His feet. Jesus doesn’t enslave you, He sets you free. Jesus doesn’t diminish your life, He enhances it ♥

 

[If Not For Grace]

One of the things the 12-step Programs Teach is Self-Care.

Rest is very important-Al-Anon members especially know the feeling of sick and tired..

this is a members ESH-Shared with permission..Sleep Technique

"Okay, sounds crazy but I swear, works like a charm for me every single time.

Go lay in your bed on your back. Deep breath in through your nose and out through your mouth. Do this three times but on the third breath in, hold your breath as long as you can and as you do, tense up your entire body, from head to toes....arms, legs, stomach, butt, feet, everything. When you can't hold your breath anymore, let it and out and at the same time relax your body.

Do this twice more, on the third deep breath, holding your breath and tensing your entire body and relax when you let your breath out when you can't hold it anymore. Within seconds every time, I am relaxed and yawning. Wow....just telling you about this, I am now yawning....samt thing that happened last night when I shared this with another of our friends. LOL. try it and let me know how it works for you."

Regular Sleep helps pave the path to regular serenity.

 

[If Not For Grace]

You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning By Karen Casey

Those who do not know how to weep with their whole heart don't know how to laugh either.
—Golda Meir

... We all know people who live on the fringes of life. They seem uninvolved with the activity in their midst, as though a pane of glass separated them from us. And there are times when we join the persons standing alone away from the vibrancy of life. Fears keep people apart, particularly the fear of letting go of the vulnerable self and joining in the feelings of the moment.

To fully reap the benefits of life, we have to risk full exposure to one another and to the experience of the moment. Full involvement in the ebb and flow of life will bring the weeping that accompanies both the pain and the joy of life. It will also bring the fruits of laughter.

Both laughter and weeping cleanse us. They bring closure to an experience. They make possible our letting go. And we must let go of pain, as well as joy, to ready ourselves for the next blessing life offers us.

When we keep ourselves apart, when we hold off the tears or the laughter, we cheat ourselves of the richness of life. We have to go through an experience fully in order to learn all it can teach us and then be free of it.

Past experiences never let me go until I fully grieve those that need to be grieved or laugh over those that deserve the light touch. The present is distorted when the past shadows it.

 

[If Not For Grace]

You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning By Karen Casey

All we are asked to bear we can bear. That is a law of the spiritual life. The only hindrance to the working of this law, as of all benign laws, is fear.
—Elizabeth Goudge

There is no problem too difficult to handle with all the help available to us. Let's not be overwhelmed. The program tells us to "Let go and let God," to ...turn it over. And that's where the solution lies.

Our challenges, the stumbling blocks in our way, beckon us toward the spiritual working-out of the problem which moves us closer toward being the women we are meant to be. Our fear comes from not trusting in the power greater than ourselves to provide the direction we need, to make known the solution.

Every day we will have challenges. We have lessons to learn which means growing pains. If we could but remember that our challenges are gifts to grow on and that within every problem lies the solution.

I will not be given more than I and my higher power can handle today, or any day.

 

[If Not For Grace]

April 6 in the Little Blue Book ONE DAY at a TIME in AL-ANON:

For my own good, I will go to Al-Anon meetings with an open mind, ready to receive and accept new ideas. For my own good, I will apply these ideas to my own life.

If I go to meetings with a mind tightly closed, ready to criticize what I hear, it is as though I were to hold a teaspoon under Niagara Falls in an effort to get water for my thirst.
...
Every Al-Anon meeting has something important to give to the listener and the sharer. I must be willing to listen and share.

TODAY’S REMINDER

I will remember that I go to Al-Anon for the instruction and emotional support I cannot find elsewhere. I will get help from others who understand my distress; I will ask for their guidance as to my own shortcomings which I may find difficult to recognize. I know I need not accept everything everyone says, but the thinking process it engenders will set me on the right path.

“I pray that I may always bring a healing helpful message to my fellow members in Al-Anon, and I pray for the willingness to search out the good in what they say to me.”

 

[If Not For Grace]

You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie

Using Others to Stop Our Pain

Our happiness is not a present someone else holds in his or her hands. Our well-being is not held by another to be given or withheld at whim. If we reach out and try to force someone to give us what we believe he or she holds, we will be disappointed. We will discover that it is an illusion. The person didn't hold it. He or she never shall. That beautifully wrapped box with the ribbon on it that we believed contained our happiness that someone was holding - it's an illusion!
...
In those moments when we are trying to reach out and force someone to stop our pain and create our joy, if we can find the courage to stop flailing about and instead stand still and deal with our issues, we will find our happiness.

Yes, it is true that if someone steps on our foot, he or she is hurting us and therefore holds the power to stop our pain by removing his or her foot. But the pain is still ours. And so is the responsibility to tell someone to stop stepping on our feet.

Healing will come when we're aware of how we attempt to use others to stop our pain and create our happiness. We will heal from the past. We will receive insights that can change the course of our relationships.

We will see that, all along, our happiness and our well-being have been in our hands. We have held that box. The contents are ours for the opening.

God, help me remember that I hold the key to my own happiness. Give me the courage to stand still and deal with my own feelings. Give me the insights I need to improve my relationships. Help me stop doing the codependent dance and start doing the dance of recovery.

 

[If Not For Grace]

You are reading from the book Twenty Four Hours a Day Hardcover (24 Hours)

Thought for the Day

In that alcoholic world, one drink always leads to another and you can't stop till you're paralyzed. And the next morning it begins all over again. You eventually land in a hospital or jail. You lose your job. Your home is broken up. You're always in a mess. You're on the merry go round and you can't get off. You're in a squirrel cage and you can't get out. Am I convinced that the alcoholic world is not a pleasant place for me to live in?
...
Meditation for the Day

I must learn to accept self-discipline. I must try never to yield one point that I have already won. I must not let myself go in resentments, hates, fears, pride, lust, or gossip. Even if the discipline keeps me separated from some people who are without discipline, nevertheless I will carry on. I may have different ways and a different standard of living than some others. I may be actuated by different motives than some people. But I will try to live the way I believe God wants me to live, no matter what others say.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may be an example to others of a better way of living. I pray that I may carry on in spite of hindrances.

 

[If Not For Grace]

You are reading from the book Touchstones

Just be what you are and speak from your guts and heart - it's all a man has.
—Hubert Humphrey

... Some of us have doubted our inner voice so completely that we abandoned it totally. Many of us have discovered in recovery that by our denial we had violated our inner voice with lies, even to ourselves. Now we question whether we can trust our instincts, and we may not know what we feel.

Masculine spiritual recovery is a return to our guts and our heart. Standing up and speaking from our hearts may be difficult at times, but our self-respect rises as we do. That is where we go for our final decision-making. We develop better reception for the inner voice as we live this program. We accept that we are never absolutely right. We continue with humility, knowing we may be wrong and listening to others and our Higher Power. Yet we must live with our choices.

I will seek the courage to be faithful to my own instincts.

 

[If Not For Grace]

You are reading from the book Twenty Four Hours a Day Hardcover (24 Hours)

Thought for the Day

Terrible things could have happened to any one of us. We never will know what might have happened to us when we were drunk. We usually thought: "That couldn't happen to me." But any one of us could have killed somebody or have been killed ourselves, if we were drunk enough. But fear of these things never kept us from drinking. Do I believe that in A.A. we have something more effective than fear?
...
Meditation for the Day

I must keep calm and unmoved in the vicissitudes of life. I must go back into the silence of communion with God to recover this calm when it is lost even for one moment. I will accomplish more by this calmness than by all the activities of a long day. At all cost I will keep calm. I can solve nothing when I am agitated. I should keep away from things that are up setting emotionally. I should run on an even keel and not get tipped over by emotional upsets. I should seek for things that are calm and good and true and stick to those things.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may not argue nor contend, but merely state calmly what I believe to be true. I pray that I may keep myself in that state of calmness that comes from faith in God's purpose for the world.

 

[If Not For Grace]

You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go By Melody Beattie

Letting Things Happen

We do not have to work so hard at gaining our insights. Yes, we're learning that painful and disappointing things happen, often for a reason and a higher purpose. Yes, these things often work out for good. But we don't have to spend so much time and energy figuring out the purpose and plan for each detail of our life. That's hypervigilence!
...
Sometimes, the car doesn't start. Sometimes, the dishwasher breaks. Sometimes, we catch a cold. Sometimes, we run out of hot water. Sometimes, we have a bad day. While it helps to achieve acceptance and gratitude for these irritating annoyances, we don't have to process everything and figure out if it's in the scheme of things.

Solve the problem. Get the car repaired. Fix the dishwasher. Nurse yourself through the cold. Wait to take the shower until there's hot water. Nurture yourself through your bad day. Tend to your responsibilities, and don't take everything so personally!

If we need to recognize a particular insight or awareness, we will be guided in that direction. Certainly, we want to watch for patterns. But often, the big insights and the significant processing happen naturally.

We don't have to question every occurrence to see how it fits into the Plan. The Plan - the awareness, the insight, and the potential for personal growth - will reveal itself to us. Perhaps the lesson is to learn to solve our problems without always knowing their significance. Perhaps the lesson is to trust ourselves to live, and experience, life.

Today, I will let things happen without worrying about the significance of each event. I will trust that this will bring about my growth faster than running around with a microscope. I will trust my lessons to reveal themselves in their own time.

 

[If Not For Grace]

Second Lives

"We are here to add what we can to, not what we can get from, life." -Sir William Osler

"Many of us used to moan, "I wish I were dead." Our addictions and obsessions made us hate ourselves. Other people scorned and pitied us. We wanted to die. We hoped that a life after death would give us rest from our constant battle with compulsions. But today we can find a better answer.
...
There is life before death. Those of us who once cried out, "nobody cares," have found loving, caring friends who share our problems and help us find the answers. They guide us daily through wonderful adventures in living. We all receive great truths in recovery."

"I have been given the chance to live two lives. The cruel one has gone. The second one is rich with blessings. Nothing must tempt me to return to the old."

-Easy Does It Daily Meditation For Today

 

[If Not For Grace]

For me it's about choices and Some Battles are just not mine to fight..

You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning By Karen Casey

To oppose something is to maintain it.
—Ursula K. LeGuin

... Most of our struggles are with other persons or perhaps situations we want to change. We discover that our continual opposition adds fuel to the fires (at least our own internal ones). But can we turn our backs when we feel justified in our opposition? There's perhaps no more difficult action to take than to walk away from those situations we feel so strongly about, but the wisdom of this program says, "Let go and let God." And when we do let go, as if by magic, relief comes. The fires die out. That which we opposed is less troubling, maybe even gone. We no longer feel the need to struggle today. The need may rise again, but again we can turn to our higher power. Trusting that relief awaits us ensures its arrival.

As women we discover many opportunities for opposition, too many persons and situations that make difficult our changing roles - too many persons who don't easily accept our changing characters. The strength to let go and let God we must share with one another.

I maintain my struggles with righteous behavior. They lose their sting when they lose my opposition. I will step aside and let God.

 

[If Not For Grace]

~ WALK IN DRY PLACES ~


WHO PUSHES MY BUTTONS?

Personal Relations

AA old-timers would be mystified today to hear program members talk about people "pushing their buttons." (They can't get your goat if they don't know where it is tied) This expression wasn't around when the early AA members pulled themselves out of the swamp and began their long journey to sobriety.
But they had their buttons pushed aplenty. Dr. Bob, treating alcoholics at St. Thomas Hospital; heard snide comments from other physicians who resented giving bed space to drunks. Bill W. struggling to launch a worldwide movement, took most every alcoholic, then and now, gets some heavy kidding from the world of drinkers.
What is the real problem in these instances? Are others pushing our buttons, or do we set ourselves up for this by being sensitive and vulnerable? Nobody could push our buttons if we didn't have buttons to push.
We no longer have to worry about button-pushers if we accept them as they are, realizing that we don't need their approval
and can't really be hurt by anything they do or say. Our serenity in the face of such problems may actually serve to attract people to AA.
Nobody can push my buttons unless I let them. Today I'll be serene and clam no matter what others say and do. Thanks to the program, I'll not worry about certain individuals who try to get under my skin.

© 1996 by Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved.

 

[If Not For Grace]

~ SAY YES TO YOUR LIFE by Ft. Leo ~ (Daily Meditations for Alcoholics and Drug Addicts) ~


CHILDLIKE


“In every real person a child is hidden that wants to play.” ~ Friedrich Nietzsche ~


Having a spiritual program means I can play and have fun. I am a mature adult, and I can still enjoy the swings in the park. But, more important, I have a daily sense of adventure. My eyes light up as I ask How? When? Where? These words still dominate my life.


I am excited about life. I am excited about my life. God is forever present in this world of color, movement, and change. But for me, God is most clearly seen in people. Others are a constant fascination. Part of my play involves people-watching, and as I gaze, my mouth still opens in amazement. The child in me fully enjoys the world in which I play.

Thank You for the toys, people, and differences that add color to my world.

 

[If Not For Grace]

~ ONE DAY AT A TIME IN AL-ANON ~


Among the many gifts we are offered in Al-Anon is freedom.

When we are new in Al- Anon, we are prisoners of our own confusion and despair. Working with the program offers us release as we learn to understand the true nature of our situation.

The gifts of Al-Anon are not without a price tag; freedom, for example, can only be achieved by paying the price we call acceptance. If we can accept the First Step, we are set free from the need to control the alcoholic. If we can surrender to God’s guidance, it will cost us our self-will, so precious to us who have always thought we could dominate. It is up to us to decide whether freedom from our despair is worth all this. Most of us believe it is.



Today’s Reminder


Success with the Al-Anon program demands that we think, honestly and in depth, about our attitudes, evaluating our words and actions. When the attitudes change from hostility to forgiveness, from violence to quiet acceptance, our words and actions follow along.


“Freedom has many facets, but mostly
it releases us from much that has
been troubling and defeating us.
We pray for this release into
freedom.”

© Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 1968, 1972, 1973

 

[If Not For Grace]

You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go By Melody Beattie

Giving Ourselves What We Deserve

I worked at a good job, making a decent salary. I had been recovering for years. Each morning, I got into my car and I thanked God for the car. The heater didn't work. And the chance of the car not starting was almost as great as the chance that it would. I just kept suffering through and thanking God. One day, it occurred to me that there was absolutely no good reason I couldn't buy myself a new car - that moment - if I wanted one. I had been gratitudeing myself into unnecessary deprivation and martyrdom. I bought the new car - that day.
... —Anonymous

Often, our instinctive reaction to something we want or need is, No! I can't afford it!

The question we can learn to ask ourselves is, But can I?

Many of us have learned to habitually deprive ourselves of anything we might want, and often things we need.

Sometimes, we can misuse the concept of gratitude to keep ourselves unnecessarily deprived.

Gratitude for what we have is an important recovery concept. So is believing we deserve the best and making an effort to stop depriving ourselves and start treating ourselves well.

There is nothing wrong with buying ourselves what we want when we can afford to do that. Learn to trust and listen to yourself about what you want. There's nothing wrong with buying yourself a treat, buying yourself something new.

There are times when it is good to wait. There are times when we legitimately cannot afford a luxury. But there are many times when we can.

Today, I will combine the principles of gratitude for what I have with the belief that I deserve the best. If there is no good reason to deprive myself, I won't.

 

[If Not For Grace]

Remember we keep it simple...

You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go By Melody Beattie

Enjoying the Good Days

Good feelings can become a habitual part of our life.
...
There is absolutely no virtue in the unnecessary suffering, which many of us have felt for much of our life. We don't have to allow others to make us miserable, and we don't have to make ourselves miserable.

A good day does not have to be the calm before the storm. That's an old way of thinking we learned in dysfunctional systems.

In recovery, a good day or a good feeling doesn't mean we're in denial. We don't have to wreck our good times by obsessively searching for or creating a problem.

Enjoying our good days doesn't mean we're being disloyal to loved ones who are having problems. We don't have to make ourselves feel guilty because other people aren't having a good day. We don't have to make ourselves miserable to be like them. They can have their day and their feelings; we can have ours.

Today, I will let myself enjoy what is good. I don't have to wreck my good day or good feeling; I don't have to let others spoil it either.

 

[If Not For Grace]

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Spilling your guts is exactly as charming as it sounds.

~ Fran Lebowitz ~


There is a difference between sharing your information with others and spilling your guts. When you provide intimate and highly personal details of your life to those with whom you do not have a close relationship, you are not deepening the relationship but, instead, may be making others uncomfortable.


While the program encourages you to look at yourself, your actions, and your behaviors with total honesty, it does not mean that you need to share every little thing you uncover with others. Telling the story of how you came into the program is one that others would like to hear, but you need to do this in a way that eliminates some of the more graphic and intimate details that do not serve a purpose.


The program teaches that when you listen to others, you take what you need and leave the rest. The goal of communication in recovery is to provide others with experiences and knowledge that will be of benefit to their own recovery. By taking the time to think about what you should share before you speak, you have a better chance of providing something of value—and not some-thing others will discard in the trash can.


I will think before I speak. I will be open and honest in ways that benefit others.

"Keep it Simple" comes to mind