Remarried in Ministry?

[j3r3m3y]

I am not in full time ministry but I wish to be. Unfortunately I find myself in a difficult situation.

I became a Christian when I was in Jr. High. I fully understood what it meant but I was basically a Sunday Christian. I accepted Christ as my Savior but I continued to live my life for myself. I never got into any real trouble or anything but I did what I wanted to do convincing myself that so long as I was generally "good" things would be ok.

In High School I met an amazing man. He was the youth pastor (Shout out to Lee Purkey if by some chance you are reading this) and he changed my life without me fully realizing it. He allowed me to help with the Jr. High youth group and got me going to a Presbyterian Camp. He also supported me and saved me in ways not even my parents were willing to do. During and after High School I did a lot of work with youth both at the church and at this camp (at first as a volunteer, then on paid staff). Sadly I did not appreciate what I had when I had it.

I moved away to be closer to a girlfriend and we were married. My walk with God was non-existant. I still tried to be a "good" person but I stopped going to church and I was truely living for myself in all aspects of my life. After 5 years of marriage I divorced.

Fast forward to this year...

I am engaged to a wonderful woman and she has a similar background as I do. Earlier this year she recommitted her life to Christ and her strength and conviction inspired me to do the same. As I look back on my life I realize the most fruitful part of my life was when I was working with youth. I feel God has gifted me in this area and I would like to utilize this gift.

In my recent reading I have come across passages in Timothy and Tituswhich spell out the qualifications for Deacons and Elders. I was crushed.

I guess what I am asking is this:

Is there any way for a divorced and remarried person to take a position of youth leadership in your church? Or have I "blown" my shot?

I know there are ways to help with the youth in the church that dont involve becoming a Pastor and if that is what I am called to do I will, I am just wondering if the mistakes I made in the past will now limit me.

 

[Living4Him03]

It depends on the church. At my church they are now allowing (southern baptist) divorced deacons. I don't see anything wrong with you volunteering to help out with the youth or to minister in that area in some capacity. However, actually becoming a youth pastor, it really depends. What does your denomination think of a youth pastor being divorced and remarried? We have many people in our church who volunteer and engage in full time ministry who have remarried. Our children's ministry leader, an awesome woman of God, is remarried.

 

[PurdueChristian]

God uses EVERYONE for his glory and if you have the gift to lead youths, then by all means USE the gift God has given you! Don't you know that once you repented that Jesus' blood covers ALL of your past sins? My pastor at a Bible Holiness church used to be into drugs and lots of bad immoral things. GOD saved him!!! He has been a Godly man ever since he was 21 years old and I respect him as a pastor more then any man on this earth (that I have met)! I have learned so much from him! He knows what it is like to not have God and that is something that a lot of people can relate to! He is able to share what he has learned through life so that we don't make the same mistakes!

God uses your past to help others if its possible! I think you should go for it and trust in God always! Gifts are from God and He and I would hate to see such a great gift wasted because of lies satan is putting in your head. Satan will do anything to stop you from witnessing or teaching God to people. DOn't listen to him! Go for it!


In Jesus' love,
Purdue Christian

 

[goodgirl]

in the episcopal church, the local bishop has to approve all remarriages. The questionnaire the rector and couple have to fill out asks some great questions:

Are both parties members of a church, and if so which one(s)? Are they active members or just occasional ones? If they are getting married at a church where they're not members, why? And what do their rectors say about their marriage proposal?
Has the couple approached any other clergy seeking permission to remarry? If yes, explain.
Has the couple received all the premarital counseling you think they need? What arrangements have been made for post-marital counseling? How often will it occur?
Which factors make you think the marriage will be successful?
In your opinion, is the previous marriage psychologically and practically ended?
Have adequate provisions been made for any children from the previous marriage?
What problems do you see ahead? Are both parties dealing soundly with realities and potential problems?
What do you think the divorced party learned from the first marriage that will help the proposed marriage to succeed?
Ages of the previously married partners, at time of wedding, separation and divorce?
How long was the couple separated before the divorce? What efforts were made to save the previous marriage? Why did those efforts fail?
Which party brought the divorce proceedings? On what grounds was the divorce obtained? Who has custody of any children, and why?
Has the divorced party fulfilled all obligations to the former partner? Is there continuing financial obligation? If yes, is there adequate money to cover those costs, plus that of a wedding and new family? Do all parties know about, and agree with, the financial arrangements?
A brief history of the marriage and a copy of the divorce decree must accompany the application.

I think if you can answer these questions satisfactorily, I think you could be a very good witness and example to those kids!