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Exactly.
And it would be hypocritical to hold it against her because we all slip up.
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Relationship question
- Thread starter blueredonyx
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And it would be hypocritical to hold it against her because we all slip up.
Do I understand you correctly: (Some) Christians consider actions of others against their beliefs - and even if they have occured before the person even knew them - as personal offenses that the others owe them an apology for so that they can generously forgive them?
Talk about taking offense easily. That would explain why so many of them consider themselves persecuted.
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SonicBOOM
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oh definitely not
keep in mind that most Christians weren't Christians all their life. Alot of people come to the faith after realizing their rough lives just aren't meeting the needs of their soul. Often times during these rough lives come choices that they will never be able to get over or undo. Losing your virginity is one of them.... personally i feel for people who lost their virginity and now have to deal with biggotted bible bashers that are always telling people how "holy a virgin is". A virgin is a worthy cause... but it's not one everyone is able to do anymore. Once your virginity is gone... there's no way to get it back. It's one of the sufferings that alot of people go through.
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Ach, don't listen to all these ridiculous liberals. It's pretty clear you must dump her. She's been broken into and is ruined forever.
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SonicBOOM
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so... cynical. I have yet to even read a response remotely close to what you say. what exactly are you trying to mock?
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Ainustorm
Active Member
Dude, you can date her, it is like Jesus... forgiving us our sin. My g-friend was sexually assaulted and lost hers, unwillingly. It is hard for her, because she regrets and feels unworthy of my love. It is hard for me... bc i love her sooo much, and it is like i have to prove it constantly. She is a gift from God... and she deserves to be loved like crazy. I am also planning on marring this girl... and i cant wait to love her for life in marriage. This gal you are dating has sinned, but has repented. Love her man, as Christ loves. There is no such thing as a perfect girl... only the best that God can have. God knows what you need, trust Him.
Do you love her? Do you see yourself marring her? Have you forgiven her for her mistake? Does she know you have forgiven her?
Blue, you will make mistakes aswell. Learn to forgive... you and her will be doin that quite often. Dont throw away somethin as wonderous as LOVE.
By the way i am still a virgin... and have a wonderful relationship with my g-friend... goin on 7months
The KEY... God needs to be center of it
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Ainustorm
Active Member
Now how would that make things better. Love is full of mistakes... if you are looking for a perfect relationship... that is a dream. Love is hard work, if God is directing it... dont back down. The woman is a mystery, a wonder of wonders. Love is a fools game to win an untamable heart. Blue, dont give-up on her... love is worth it!
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It was pretty clear to me that Charmtrap was, in fact, being facetious.
As for the OP, if you love her, let it go, and move forward in your relationship. You can get through this if you two are in love and want to make it work.
As for the OP, if you love her, let it go, and move forward in your relationship. You can get through this if you two are in love and want to make it work.
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Honestly, even I'm not sure...
I was mocking that question even needed to be asked, I guess...I mean, it's not the OP's fault, really. Just that a climate exists in which someone having sex and then repenting of that decision and foreswearing doing it again would still raise a question as to their suitability as a girlfriend baffles me.
Ah, forget it...it was just a toss-off jab anyway...
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SonicBOOM
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we all have different backgrounds though man. what seems normal to you won't seem normal to someone else. I'm actually glad that this person asked for some advice. It would be very unfortunate if he broke the heart of a girl he likes because of a misleading belief that he never felt like questioning. He likes this girl and this girl likes him [I'm gathering]. If he didn't ask for some advice than the break-up would be especially tragic because of it's complete unnecessity.
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Well, how does she feel about everything you've ever done? Don't act so innocent, virginity =/= perfection.
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PassionFruit
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I don't think her sexual history should matter. I mean, if she is truly sorry, then I would move past that and continue to date her.
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I think this should be moved to Christian Advice, as this is not the place you'd probably want for just issues regarding this.
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I think he has gotten great answers. Including the pat christan answers. If he wanted "christan only" he'd have posted there.
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TheOutsider
Pope Iason Ouabache the Obscure
This is very tame compared to what you would find on any other internet forum. Go ask your question somewhere else and see what happens. It'd be a feeding frenzy.
The internet, serious business.
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- Sep 6, 2006
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You're actually right. Though I disagree that any other board would go mad on him. Some far Right sites would call him a bad Christian for dating a non-virgin....some secular sites would make a disgusting joke about it because of their freshman mentality.
This is very tame compared to what you would find on any other internet forum. Go ask your question somewhere else and see what happens. It'd be a feeding frenzy.
The internet, serious business.
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The really sad thing here is that it appears the girlfriend feels 'unworthy'.
If she'd been a thief, or used profanity, or drank too much before repenting, would she be questioning her own worth like this?
My opinion: probably not. Whatever brand of Christianity she has bought into has seemingly left her with the impression (intentional or not) that her lost hymen was of far greater value than her good qualities.
If the OP wants to stay with this woman, and if her pastor has a lick of common sense and compassion, they should both go get a little judicious counselling.
I'm not so many years away from being a Christian that I don't think there are no sensible pastors/ministers out there, and she sounds like she could be comforted by such a person.
If she'd been a thief, or used profanity, or drank too much before repenting, would she be questioning her own worth like this?
My opinion: probably not. Whatever brand of Christianity she has bought into has seemingly left her with the impression (intentional or not) that her lost hymen was of far greater value than her good qualities.
If the OP wants to stay with this woman, and if her pastor has a lick of common sense and compassion, they should both go get a little judicious counselling.
I'm not so many years away from being a Christian that I don't think there are no sensible pastors/ministers out there, and she sounds like she could be comforted by such a person.
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