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relapse-horrible night

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O

OCD Worrier

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May 6, 2012
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had a breakthrough, a real breakthrough that i truly believe was
from the Lord. instead of going with it and putting my trust in
the Lord, i went my own way so to speak. before long i was having
a really, really bad time with my ocd. its lasted all night. now i'm
worse than before. i felt earlier when things started that the Lord
was kinda letting me know to kinda settle down and hold on to
Him, trust Him. exercise my faith. but i kinda pushed it aside and
ignored it i guess. STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID. before long my
ocd was really bad and as always the thoughts came in worse than
before. now i have no excuse. i think this was my last chance. the
Lord wont help me again. if i had calmed down and trusted the Lord,
i'd probably would have been able to sleep and as such not up
having those awful thoughts. my fault, no excuse now. if i had just
listened................
 
babegirl111

babegirl111

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Jan 17, 2008
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I absolutely do not believe that that was your last chance. I think most of us here have not grasped the fact that we have an illness. Why in the world would God punish us for something that is out of our control. He will never leave you and never give up on you. He knows that you are struggling with this illness and He wants to be there for you and make you stronger. You will get through this and God will ALWAYS be there!!!
 
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C

Christian-Catholic

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OCD Worrier said:
had a breakthrough, a real breakthrough that i truly believe was
from the Lord. instead of going with it and putting my trust in
the Lord, i went my own way so to speak. before long i was having
a really, really bad time with my ocd. its lasted all night. now i'm
worse than before. i felt earlier when things started that the Lord
was kinda letting me know to kinda settle down and hold on to
Him, trust Him. exercise my faith. but i kinda pushed it aside and
ignored it i guess. STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID. before long my
ocd was really bad and as always the thoughts came in worse than
before. now i have no excuse. i think this was my last chance. the
Lord wont help me again. if i had calmed down and trusted the Lord,
i'd probably would have been able to sleep and as such not up
having those awful thoughts. my fault, no excuse now. if i had just
listened................
Click to expand...


OCD-Worrier, God isnt goingto hold your disorder against you. Its the complete opposite, he will be more lenient on you because he understands you inside and out better then you can ever understand yourself.

Faith doesnt depend on feelings my friend. Jesus made the promise that he will not let any of us slip through his fingers. Jesus didnt say "you have so and so many chances", He said he wont let you slip from his fingers. That means never ever ever :)

The fact that this bothers you so much and you want it gone means you have great faith. With ocd, it is known as the imp of the mind.

Imagine your faith being this great big rock, you have always seen that rock in front of you. Think of OCD as a big morning FOG or CLOUD.

The Fog makes it very hard to see the rock which has always been in front of you, but that doesnt mean the rock is gone. Its just covered by the fog, but that rock has always been there. Once the fog lifts you will see that the rock never left.
 
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