Recent Diagnosis

[misfit76]

I have recently been diagnosed with Bipolar 1 Disorder w/o psychotic features. I've kinda known or felt like I had bipolar or something like it for a long time. Getting the actual diagnosis was hard on me, I guess it's hard on everyone cause it's not something anyone wants to have. The doctor put me on lithium and lexapro first and I couldn't handle the lithium. Now I'm on Buspar, Topamax and Latuda. I just started taking all of those yesterday. This morning I had a major melt down. I don't even know why. That happens a lot though. I get upset and cry, or get mad or whatever for no reason. My depression is always worse during the winter months but I do have depression during the summer as well. I have depressed episodes more than manic episodes but not by much. I have had several suicide attempts. I've done and said things I never thought I would have and wish I could go back and take it all back. I am to the point I can't work anymore, I'm not dependable and I'm too moody and emotional. I really feel sorry for my poor husband for having to deal with me through all of this but I thank God for him too because I do not know what I would do without him. I am such a mess. I just hope and pray I can find something fast that will help with all of the mood swings. I have been an emotional roller-coaster for so many years now. I know finding the right meds can be a challenge with bipolar disorder, it's just wishful thinking.

 

[Loven God]

The most scary thing for me was when I found out I had bipolar was the fact I would have it for the rest of my life . It took 3 years for them to find the right meds for me , they worked for 6 years then stoped working . Back into the hospital I went and they changed all my meds . It was just about 4 weeks ago I had to go back into the hospital but they only changed one med and took one away . I just hate to think the rest of my life will be like this .

But there is hope and that is what we have to hange on to . It can get better . I find that prayer is what helps me the most in tough times and the help of my very understanding husband . You are blessed to have the husband you do and so am I not many husbands are that understanding and caring .

 

[Talihood]

Lamictal is what really helped me. it's a mood stabilizer.

 

[RuthD]

I felt strange about being diagnosed, too. Like I was the only one but in reality I am not. My psychologist of the past told me that all symptoms of having a mental illness are regular characteristics of a human being but they have gone haywire or to an extreme. That made me feel less weird. My last psychiatrist said I have Bipolar II. There is more irratibility and depression with it. The hypomania isn't as extreme as Bipolar I. I still don't know if I really believe I have it. I have my reasons but it would be a long story. I have a social worker now and I may ask her to test me for it. I know for sure I have PTSD and a little OCD. The OCD used to be way worse. Oh yes, I take Geodon, Klonopin, Effexor XR and Trazadone. Anyways, I've been going on and on, sorry. I am praying for you. God bless you.

 

[sahjimira]

I was kind of relieved when diagnosed with bp2. That answered a lot! started lamictal and clonazepam a month ago. Seems better but anxiety is still a problem along with some agitation. How r u all doing? I know these r old posts

 

[Korah]

misfit 76 you don't seem to prove you are Bipolar. That psychiatrist give you so many meds means that they think you have a very serious condition, whatever it it. You sound schizoaffective to me, you combine depression with a psychosis that being out-of-control makes you seem manic. I don't think it's real mania.
They seem to be giving you all the newest presumably best meds. That they took you off lithium indicates (1) they first thought you have bipolar, but are switching to a new diagnoses they may not have told you yet, (2) lithium just makes you more depressed, just like it did me, it never worked for me to stabilize my mood, just make my mood lower and eventually not able to function, and (3) lithium may have already started damaging your parathyroid. As a result of lithium I have hyperparathyroidism and have to take daily nasal injections of Calcitonin-Salmon.

 

[Korah]

RuthD you have more depression than mania, but that's standard with Bipolar II. But you have so many antidepressants that I wonder if you are bipolar at all. Maybe you are schizoaffective.
There is no test for Bipolar or for any mental illness.
The Adams Test for Bipolar is this:
"If you have been incarcerated or institutionalized, you have Bipolar I. If you have not, you're Bipolar ii. (Unless of course you are neither.)"

 

[sahjimira]

misfit 76 you don't seem to prove you are Bipolar. That psychiatrist give you so many meds means that they think you have a very serious condition, whatever it it. You sound schizoaffective to me, you combine depression with a psychosis that being out-of-control makes you seem manic. I don't think it's real mania.
They seem to be giving you all the newest presumably best meds. That they took you off lithium indicates (1) they first thought you have bipolar, but are switching to a new diagnoses they may not have told you yet, (2) lithium just makes you more depressed, just like it did me, it never worked for me to stabilize my mood, just make my mood lower and eventually not able to function, and (3) lithium may have already started damaging your parathyroid. As a result of lithium I have hyperparathyroidism and have to take daily nasal injections of Calcitonin-Salmon.

What is schizoaffective?

 

[Korah]

Affective disorders are basically up (bipolar) and down (depressed) moods. In contrast are psychoses, most notably Schizophrenia. Schizoaffective is simply the co-mingling of depression and Schizophrenia. Hallucinations or delusions accompany the depression.

 

[sahjimira]

Affective disorders are basically up (bipolar) and down (depressed) moods. In contrast are psychoses, most notably Schizophrenia. Schizoaffective is simply the co-mingling of depression and Schizophrenia. Hallucinations or delusions accompany the depression.

Thanks for the clarification

 

[Odetta]

Korah, are you a doctor? You should not be diagnosing over the internet if you are, you should not be diagnosing at all if you aren't. Sharing research or definitions is fine; telling someone what you think they have or don't have as if it's definitive is not.

 

[Korah]

Sounds reasonable, of course,
but this IS the "Bipolar" section (NOT the "mental health" section) that is for those of us who have (or who think we might have or have been told we have) Bipolar. I am telling my personal experience from 55 years of overt manic-depression and 30 years of psychoaffective medications against bipolar prescribed for me by psychiatrists.
My only maternal uncle was an M. D. as was his father and both my grandfather's two brothers and his wife's (my grandmother's) uncle. I may have received like genes qualifying me for medical certification except for my aversion to blood.
I did not even diagnose anyone here. I questioned one diagnosis--is that all right with you? If misfit76 is correct that her manias have only followed antidepressants, then there is no evidence that she has either Bipolar I or II. It remains LIKELY that she does, as the warnings against antidepressants only warn people that they may provoke mania in people who are known to be subject to mania. Her meds are all over the map for psychoses, depression, and schizoaffective.
But no, I do not have an M. D. license, I am just self-taught on meds (including nutritional, alternative), mental illness, and psychology in general (like Myers-Briggs classifications and such).

 

[The Rt Hon. Jimmy]

I can very much relate because I have almost the same diagnosis as you but with psychosis on the side. I've had times where I would genuinely believe I'm immortal and I was the chosen one to save the world from an upcoming judgement day, all because god told me so. But it wasn't god, it was just my mind. I was hospitalized in the past because of this. At least I'm not delusional when depressed.
Just keep fightin' it and follow your heart, listen to your doctors if they seem trustworthy, keep following your treatment and keep going.

 

[Bluelion]

I would not listen to Korah, I have a lower degree in Human Services and there is a very large book with diagnoses but it is only a guide its something Dsm manual, i forget now something like that.

What you have is a working diagnoses, it means it can change and most likely will. It takes many many years to reach a true diagnoses. Like 5 at least.

That said, you have to get a handle on this your self, the meds are only going to work about half way. They will dull the emotions and let you deal with them but you have to control it. Your going to have to do a lot of work. I speak from experience. With me docs and psychologist tell me there is very real spiritual stuff going on with me, and i don't mean one professional told me that but many. I trained in those things so its like yeah no kidding.

If you do not meditate start. I find nature sounds or traditional Chinese music to be the best. Let your mind be empty, sit Indian style, back straight, close your eyes. Work on empty your mind if a thought comes up don't fix on it just let it pass. One way to train to have no thoughts is by a wedge. that is we put one thought we think of to get rid of others, this thought is the breath. Breath in for 15 seconds and out for 15 seconds, try to take two breath a min in out one breath, this slows down your heart rate and gets rid of anxiety. If two breath a min is to much start higher like 3 but i would say no more than 4 or you defeat the purpose, the goal is to get to one breath a min.

Another thing you need to get really goo at expressing how you feel with words. Also find a hobby where you can express your self and exercises to get out excess energy. this is a good start, pm if you want with any questions or advice and that goes for anyone with mental illness trying to get a handle on it and reading this. this is not just for the OP but for everyone with mental illness.