Question about husbands internet searches

[RestoreTheJoy]

If you unilaterally cut off the internet, your marriage is doomed.

If she doesn't, the marriage is doomed. Not to say she should not tell him she is doing it.

This is a supposedly adult person who is incapable of behaving responsibly on the internet. It's like keeping alcohol in the home if he struggles with alcohol addiction. That would be stupid to make it easy.

 

[Tinker Grey]

If she doesn't, the marriage is doomed. Not to say she should not tell him she is doing it.

This is a supposedly adult person who is incapable of behaving responsibly on the internet. It's like keeping alcohol in the home if he struggles with alcohol addiction. That would be stupid to make it easy.

I understand what you are saying, but if you treat your spouse like a child and make decisions for them rather than getting buy-in, you'll wreck everything.

The first step is counselling. In that setting, you get agreements on what steps to take and THEN implement them. If you can't get counselling (spouse not interested), then you attempt an adult conversation about how to move forward. If they are deaf to that (won't cooperate in any way), get out.

 

[RestoreTheJoy]

I understand what you are saying, but if you treat your spouse like a child and make decisions for them rather than getting buy-in, you'll wreck everything.

The first step is counselling. In that setting, you get agreements on what steps to take and THEN implement them. If you can't get counselling (spouse not interested), then you attempt an adult conversation about how to move forward. If they are deaf to that (won't cooperate in any way), get out.

Don't you think the time for discussing counseling has occurred long ago? If there was any buy-in, that would have occurred already. She has been posting about this stuff for awhile.

 

[Tinker Grey]

Don't you think the time for discussing counseling has occurred long ago? If there was any buy-in, that would have occurred already. She has been posting about this stuff for awhile.

Then it's over. As soon as you decide to control your spouse, it's over.

 

[mama2one]

Did you do it without discussing it with your spouse?

yes, cut it off to save us $
when your husband puts you in charge of finances like OP, you handle it

 

[YeshuaFan]

Did you do it without discussing it with your spouse?

That could be dangerous....

 

[JCFantasy23]

yes, cut it off to save us $
when your husband puts you in charge of finances like OP, you handle it

That would have created a war in my house.

It only works with certain couples/people - so people aren't on the internet much. Most husbands would find it disrespectful and freak out.

I understand what you are saying, but if you treat your spouse like a child and make decisions for them rather than getting buy-in, you'll wreck everything.

Agreed.

 

[RestoreTheJoy]

Then it's over. As soon as you decide to control your spouse, it's over.

Perhaps. But I wouldn't be sitting idly by while he was doing it in MY house where MY(our) children live. Heck no.

 

[RestoreTheJoy]

That would have created a war in my house.

It only works with certain couples/people - so people aren't on the internet much. Most husbands would find it disrespectful and freak out.



Agreed.

Really? You think a husband looking at THAT demeaning stuff has a leg to stand on when discussing what is disrespectful?

I think not. C

 

[rambot]

Really? You think a husband looking at THAT demeaning stuff has a leg to stand on when discussing what is disrespectful?

I think not. C

No. An impartial third party looking at that situation did though