Question about a friend who committed suicide.....

[Thirsty4Him]

I had a friend named "Heather" when I was in 8th grade. She had a brother named "Joe." Joe was about 2 or 3 years younger. He was always real happy. I can remember when he used to belt out songs on the bus! We used to hate it when he sang, but he was so funny. He always wore a tan Adidas hat with matching white socks. He carried around his Bible and was the nicest guy. After 8th grade I moved, and I didnt talk to Heather again. One day I got an email saying that Joe had died. I was really sad even though we werent all that close. I didnt know how he died so I called another friend to see what happened. She said that Joe had hung himself in his house. Heather found him. (Sorry for the graphic-ness) I couldnt believe it. I was very angry for along time and I blamed myself because I thought If I still lived there he might have talked to me or I would have been able to see what was wrong. But when I found out the reason I was even more enraged. He did it because he made the Middle School soccer team and as initiation the varsitity team would shave their heads. He didnt want to. The team was supposedly making fun of him, but that didnt make sence to me because they all got along before. Joe was only 12. 12 years old. Gosh........that truly breaks my heart. After all this long story, I just wanted to know if he would have gone to Heaven. I need to know the truth. He was a Christian. Some people I have talked to said no becuase he took hisr own life, others said yes because he was a Christian. I just wanted to know. I wish he was still here. He was the kind of guy that brought light into a room. He could have changed the world you know. Thank You for your help.

 

[Rafael]

God is merciful and knows all things. It doesn't sound like Joe was even to the maturity level of being accountable for sin. Besides, we don't know and cannot judge, but we know that God will be perfect in His justice and love. You can trust God with the life He has created.

 

[rogsr]

I'm sorry that things like this happen, this makes me really sad. God judges hearts, we can only judge actions. I have done some really stupid things that could have resulted in my death and I know God has forgiven me. So, I don't see why God would not forgive this little one too.

It seems to me that there are a million reasons why people sin but only one reason why they go to hell. The reason is that they hate God. Jesus said that if you blasphemy the Father or the Son you will be forgiven, but if you blasphemy the Holy Spirit you will not be forgiven. To me, blasphemying the Holy Spirit is to know that there is a God and then spit at Him. It sounds like your friend made a very bad decision that cost him his life, but in the end nothing more.

I hope you are able to get through this struggle, I know the Lord is with you. Blessed are they who mourn, for they shall be comforted.

 

[Thirsty4Him]

This has pushed me farther away from God, but I am starting to realize that everything has a purpose and that God is a loving God. I have had a hard time dealing with this but I think that I'm just now starting to listen and acknowledge God's presence again. Thank You.

 

[desi]

In HS a friend of a friend killed himself with a gun. Her boyfriend wouldn't go so I went and ended up being a pall bearer as the dead fellow had few friends. I met him once when we ditched lunch and went to Taco Johns. The guy was quiet and pale with dark blue eyes and long black hair. He was a nice fellow to meet in passing. I remember thinking I wish I had blue eyes like his. Growing up is hard. Some of us don't live through it. I pray for the others who will forever be in that magical stage of life, not yet an adult but no longer a child.

 

[Caelum]

There is no definitive answer as to where people who take their own lives go. However, it is widely believed that someone who takes their own life is so engulfed by satan and evil that they were a prisoner of satan and his evil and unable to rationalize and regain faith/hope. If this were the case, im sure through God's Grace justice would be delivered. Another important factor is his age, it is entirely too unfortunate when such things happen to such young lives...put your trust in God's Grace and use it to strengthen your own Faith. While these things happen, and they often don't make sense to us, and they hurt many of us, they can be used to make us stronger in Christ. Praise God for being his child, a child of hope, thank God for being spiritually strong and from your friends despair you can find hope

 

[Mr.Cheese]

*hug*
Suicide is confusing to deal with (An understatement for sure).

What he did is between him and God.

Why he did it? We rarely ever get the whole answer to that question. My friend Alex shot himself over a speeding ticket. There has to be more it than that, but no one will ever know what.

Always believe in God's goodness no matter what the situation. You may not understand the situation. You may not ever come to understand it. I certainly haven't worked out Alex yet and that was fifteen years ago.
But God has the power to take bad things and turn them into good things. I understand how you feel. By Alex I can relate to you. That's not so bad.

 

[Thirsty4Him]

It's just hard for me to understand how a 12 year old boy could even have the idea in his mind of wanting to take his own life. When I was 12 I played with Barbie Dolls and makeup! I don't see how suicide would be an option for a person that young, espically in that way. I feel so bad for his family, and I just wish that there was a way to make it all better. But thank you all for your replies. It means a lot to me.

 

[allieisme]

Wow!
This breaks my heart.. It always does when this sort of thing happens, but to kids? to a 12 year old? Gosh! The pressure of kids at schools this days is remarkable.
I'll be praying for his family

 

[rainbowprism]

My heart goes out to you. I have dealt with two people who have attempted suicide throughout my life--an exboyfriend and a roomate. It doesn't make any sense...it's impossible to really know what can make someone that discouraged about life. The best thing to do is talk to people about this, talk out your feelings, and especially talk to God. I believe he went to heaven--God is just and mericiful!

 

[herev]

nowhere in the bible does it say that suicide leads to damnation! the belief is that suicide as a final act denies you the possiblitiy of asking for forgiveness. Yet, I beleive that most of us die with sin that we have not asked forgiveness for. In Catholicism, there is the possiblity of Purgatory (spelling?). But for me, Romans 8:1--there is therefore now now condemnation for those who are in Christ JEsus-that includes the saved and those who are not yet able to answer for themselves. Sorry for your pain!

 

[Caelum]

It's just hard for me to understand how a 12 year old boy could even have the idea in his mind of wanting to take his own life. When I was 12 I played with Barbie Dolls and makeup! I don't see how suicide would be an option for a person that young, espically in that way. I feel so bad for his family, and I just wish that there was a way to make it all better. But thank you all for your replies. It means a lot to me.

You'd be surprised, I had a lot of problems when I was 10/11 and even wrote a will(heh) when I was 11 because I planned on killing myself...it depends largely on the person, how they were raised. I was a very typical 11yo and appeared happy to all who saw/knew me, but once I was alone I was troubled and lost beyond imaginable depths. My point is, that satan can and will haunt the most vulnerable people, regardless of age, which brings us to see why we should love God even more, for protecting us from him...

Keep strong in Jesus

 

[rainbowprism]

nowhere in the bible does it say that suicide leads to damnation! the belief is that suicide as a final act denies you the possiblitiy of asking for forgiveness. Yet, I beleive that most of us die with sin that we have not asked forgiveness for.

Yeah I understand what you're saying here and it kinda made a light turn on in my head so I'm going to elaborate on that. Ok look at Judas....everyone totally villianizes Judas for betraying Jesus. Well when you think about it what Peter did was no worse. He denied Jesus three times and sat by the fire with the soldiers that had arrested Jesus. There really is no difference in thier acts, except Peter asked for forgiveness. Judas didn't seek reconciliation. But I agree, probably most of us will die with some unresolved sin because death is fickle....

But anyways...I believe since your friend was saved he is in heaven. There is only one unpardonable sin and I personally believe that is purposeful, deliberate ongoing act of no acknowledgement spanning a lifetime....

 

[Yitzchak]

the Lord reserves the right to decide people's eternal fate........One thing we can be certain of is this....none of us have earned or desrve heaven.....it is only on the basis of forgiveness and grace that any of us make it to heaven.
Will God deny His grace to this person??? I would hate to insult God by presuming to speak for Him on this matter......