Pursuing a Man vs. Waiting to be Pursued

[redblue22]

I find all the best girls. my car screens out the ones looking for chedda.

 

[MehGuy]

God is the only good. So a "good gal" is of God. Physical features perish.

I'm just telling you what he probably meant by "good gals", your definition is irrelevant.

 

[redblue22]

yes, I'd date the girls on FB. except the ones who like Princess Bride.

200$ is offensive. are you picking up girls in the ghetto? come on. that isn't near enough for the suburbs.

christian guys don't generally advertise their consulting a happy medium

 

[astein]

I'm just telling you what he probably meant by "good gals", your definition is irrelevant.

Lol. Ah, come on.

 

[astein]

I find all the best girls. my car screens out the ones looking for chedda.

A whole new spin on knight ridah.

 

[MacFall]

What the heck is "chedda"?

 

[Toro]

What the heck is "chedda"?

Awww foo be trippin yo.

Chedda is what it takes ta get da bling bling. werd?

 

[NoodlesNoodlesNoodles]

I've always been in the "waiting for a man to pursue me" camp. But lately, I'm wondering if I've been doing it wrong all these years.

While I'll avoid the deeper discussion of concepts like "just how much pursuit is appropriate," "What the difference between pursuit and showing interest," and "How do I know when the male is relying on me too much to make moves," I have a few thoughts on the overall "okayness" of female initiation.

My understanding of several passages of scripture itself and the words of Christ / God the Father include encouragement of their bride, (either in the form of Israel as a nation, the church as a corporate body, or individual believers) to show her interest in and begin a pursuit of the spiritual relationship.

Certainly God is shown as being the primary cause of our relationship with him; He sought us and bought us, as the old hymn goes. But there is a duality of though presented throughout scripture that it's also his "bride" that is to be seeking him. And yet God being the primary pursuer can't be exactly analogized to human men pursuing women because God, the perfect, must seek the imperfect; the lost. Men and women are both imperfect, so I'm not convinced that because God sought us before we sought him, that therefore men are always to be the initiator of a relationship.

Also, If a man doesn't initiate because he's scared, that's a problem with fear, not a problem with the sequence of who initiates. Maybe it's also women who aren't initiating because they're also scared -- so men shouldn't pursue them either because solid relationships aren't built well by cowards. The shoe fits well on both feet.)

If a woman was of the mind that it was the man who should initiate (in a moral sense), lest there be a continual tendency throughout a relationship and into marriage for the man to be passive, I would mark her as untrustworthy. I need honesty and forthrightness. If I got into a relationship with someone like that, I would always be on my guard, always uncertain that there were unspoken expectations and thoughts that I wasn't living up to. Always feeling like I was bearing the entire burden of maintaining a relationship with them, needing to either 1) Know almost everything that was going on in her mind and address it, and 2) Constantly check up with her to ask "Okay, is there anything I'm missing? Anything on your mind?" (Which is similar to what should be taking place anyway, that of relational checkups, but skewed in a wicked direction of lordship and unreasonable and ungracious expectations being placed on a finite creature).

 

[NoodlesNoodlesNoodles]

What the heck is "chedda"?

Skrill. Clams. Shekels. Fins. Cs. Gs. Paper. Cabbage. Sawbucks. Spondulix. Lucre. Large. Ducats. Coin. Dime. Moola. Dough. Yards. Wad. Stacks. Wampum. Scratch. Dead presidents. Chips. Roll. Benjamins. Beans. Means. Checks. Capital. Currency. Stash. Cash. Doubloons. Dibs. Bits. Dinero. Bundle. Fortune. Boffo. Tender. Scrip. Gelt. Pap. Spondulicks. Specie. Jack. Mint. Mazuma. Frogskins. Greenbacks. Banknotes. Loot.

 

[Toro]

Skrill. Clams. Shekels. Fins. Cs. Gs. Paper. Cabbage. Sawbucks. Spondulix. Lucre. Large. Ducats. Coin. Dime. Moola. Dough. Yards. Wad. Stacks. Wampum. Scratch. Dead presidents. Chips. Roll. Benjamins. Beans. Means. Checks. Capital. Currency. Stash. Cash. Doubloons. Dibs. Bits. Dinero. Bundle. Fortune. Boffo. Tender. Scrip. Gelt. Pap. Spondulicks. Specie. Jack. Mint. Mazuma. Frogskins. Greenbacks. Banknotes. Loot.

Moniez?

 

[Strider1002]

Honestly, I'm not accustomed to pursuing. My experience is usually with her pursuing me, or else it was completely mutual and there was no need for pursuit because we both acknowledged our feelings almost immediately.