Ptsd

[Daveptsd]

I think dreams are an outlet for our subconscious. It seems, in your dream, that you're trapped in something you have no control of - but you already believe that. Dreams don't make our reality. You will learn to survive and manage ptsd as your future unfolds. Too bad we can't see it ahead of time - but faith wouldn't grow then.

I led my infantry company into a terrible ambush. Half our company were casualties and my entire squad was killed. Several more incidents left me nearly paralized with fear and guilt. God was, is and will always be there for us through it all. I was so focused on my pain that I couldn't see Him for a long time (I was also very stubburn). It's normal, don't worry about it.

 

[Emily99]

That's pretty scary! You know it won't happen, though, don't you? I used to worry about things like that. I hope you can get your thinking to go in a different direction. Are there any crafts you like? Can you force yourself to do something that you usually enjoy? I have a real problem with getting the dishes done, when it's something I used to enjoy doing (I know, gag). Now I have to force myself to do them, sometimes after having them sit for more than a week or so, but I feel so much better after doing them, that I feel like doing other things. It also seems to break my PTSD train of thought, if even for a while. I can feel angry at first, one time I even threw in all the silverware (I have a dishwasher, so there's no excuse). Luckily I didn't break anything, lol. Do you feel almost paralyzed from your symptoms? That happens to me a lot. If I had to work, I'd be a basket case. I went to a Bible class for the first time a few weeks ago (after many, many years of not going), and while we were all standing, I turned around and almost fell over. That's how bad the panic was that I was feeling. Well, you don't need to listen to my problems. Please keep writing. I care very much about how you're doing. ((((HUGE HUG))))

 

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

My panic can be very debilitating. It makes it very hard to move...very hard to breath.

 

[Emily99]

Set one little goal for yourself each day. I have been where you are, believe me. The goal can be very simple, like putting your tissues in the trash - or maybe only one. Just a little something extra, and it can be the tiniest little thing. You'll feel better, I promise. At this point you are taking smaller than baby steps, but it is progress. Then if you're up to it, plan what little thing you will do the next day. Give Praise to the Lord for each little accomplishment. This really works, and you can do it. Let me know what your first goal will be. ((((Loving you in the Lord))))

 

[Emily99]

I'm sorry it took me so long to get back to you. On Thursday I am leaving to visit my cousins in Colorado, and won't be back until Monday or Tuesday, so I've been doing laundry, etc. I will keep in touch with you until I have to go.

 

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

Feeling absolutely horrible. Been having bad dreams the last few nights. I have a lot of anxiety when it comes to sleeping and night time. Usually I don't sleep until I get so exhausted that I just can't stay awake anymore. Well lately I've been sleeping more because I have this bad cold. I've completely lost my voice. My throat hurts so terribly, and now I have a bad cough and it hurts everytime I cough. This cold is sucking all the energy out of me. Still doesn't keep the PTSD symptoms away.

 

[Phogg]

Do you have a psychiatrist who can prescribe meds?
Early on when i had flooding of flashbacks I needed an antipsychotic to give me dreamless sleep.
I think I was on Seroquel for seven months.

 

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

I was taking 50mg of serequel and was doing well on it, and my psychiatrist thought I was doing so well that he could start to get me off of it...so he lowered my dose to 25mg since then I haven't been doing well at all. And serequel doesn't give me a dreamless sleep.I wish!

 

[Emily99]

My doctor prescribed for nightmares Prazosin HCL 5MG capsules. It seems to work for me. It also helps lower blood pressure if you're having problems with that. I also take 100 MG of Trazodone at night, which I highly recommend. It's for sleep and depression. I rarely remember my dreams.

Strong4Him, I am so sorry you are sick now, too. Dear Lord Jesus, I lift my sister up to you, and pray that you would touch her body, mind and spirit with the healing power of the Holy Spirit. We come against the enemy by the blood of the Lamb: we rebuke you in Jesus name, and send you where Jesus would send you. Keep your hands off this child of the King! Send your angels to continually comfort her, Lord and let her see and feel the power of your Holy Spirit right now! We praise you Lord Jesus for what you have done! AMEN

 

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

I actually have pretty good blood pressure. I don't know whats going to happen with meds. I meet with my psychiatrist Friday though. So hopefully this will get sorted out soon.

 

[Emily99]

I've prayed that the Lord will give your psychiatrist wisdom as far as you're concerned. I also take a mild tranquilizer -- clonazepam .5 mg -- during the day (morning and late afternoon) that really helps with panic and PTSD symptoms. You're going to be okay. Hang in there.

 

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

I don't feel like I'm going to be okay. Having a cold and then having a panic attack on top of that makes it extremely hard to breathe. It was awful. Kind of wish I could just stay in bed and sleep for a very long time.

 

[Emily99]

Have faith in the Lord to see you through this, because he WILL. You still need to be on meds, but if I can get through all the things I have, then you can too.

All my therapists have told me that they have never known another patient who has been through as many traumas as I have and survived. I have seen the hand of the Lord work in miraculous ways to save me many times. I've even had angels come to help me. When I look at those ink stained cards that a psychiatrist shows you, all I see is blood. My current therapist compares me to a holocaust survivor. I am telling you these things to let you know that you will make it. Start praising the Lord that you are alive, that your assailant didn't kill you. God has plans for you and hope for a future. Trust Him. He knows what you're going through. This will strengthen you and develop you into a strong woman of God. (((HUGS)))

 

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

I am hopeful today. I can feel God with me today and I know that He will see me though if I just trust Him.

 

[Emily99]

You don't know how happy I am to hear you say this!! Thank you, Lord!!! I was praying for you in the dentist office this afternoon. I felt so much peace. I practically fell asleep through my whole filling! Keep trusting Him and having faith, because it will build and you will get stronger and stronger. Your symptoms may still be there, but God will walk through it with you. He will always be right beside you!

 

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

Just to hear that someone is praying for me, lightens my heart of the many burdens it carries. Thank you so much for your prayers!

 

[Emily99]

You are so very welcome! I am leaving tomorrow morning and will be gone until next Monday night. I will be keeping you in my prayers! Take care of yourself and remember to hang onto that hope you have. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not unto your own understanding, and He shall direct thy paths.

 

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

So I meet with my psychiatrist tomorrow, been thinking this afternoon what I need to tell him. I really wish this cold would go away because its making me feel even more miserable than I already am.

 

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

I met with my psychiatrist today and he increased my dose on the med I take for depression. Kind of disappointing that I need it yet, but I do agree that I still need it...I wasn't doing good without it. He also said that I needed to get blood work done again which I'm not thrilled about considering I pass out nearly every time I get blood drawn. (I was told I get that from my grandpa, he tends to pass out too when getting blood drawn)

 

[Emily99]

I am back from my trip. How are you?? I prayed for you a lot, and my cousin and I prayed for you, too. I'm glad your pdoc upped your antidepressant. I hope you will be feeling the effects of it soon. (((Loving you in the Lord))