Hi... I know its been a while, but I've been busy, I suppose.
About a year ago, I was working for a gentleman who, well, let's just say had some issues. Dealing with his issues (while my wife was expecting a baby, no less) caused me much grief. My blood pressure jumped 20 points, and I probably came as close as I have ever come to having a nervous breakdown. (I may not have been that close in objective terms, but I was certainly closer.) Eventually, he closed his business.
After my former boss closed his business, his best friend took over his book of business and hired me. Like a fixture, I went with the business. My family relocated about 120 miles up the road to a town where we had no real connections. In all of our moves, my wife said that she felt the least excited about this one. In her words, this was a survival move.
With that back story, please understand that I have a great deal of respect and brotherly love for my boss. (Actually, I have two bosses, both of whom I think a lot about.) But I have a strong dissatisfaction about my current situation. Am I being ungrateful? Am I walking in an unscriptural form of discontent? Please tell me if you can.
At present, my wife does not work. We have an infant daughter for whom we have no person we can trust to watch were my wife to begin working. (Again we have no connections in this town.) Even if we did, my wife is committed to homeschooling our son, who is nine and dyslexic. My wife is trained as a schoolteacher, and she is good with our boy. Besides, the schools around here are so strapped for cash that she couldn't get a teaching job if she wanted as there has been serious talk of closing certain public schools for budget reasons.
Of course, she could, get a part-time job working at Wal-Mart, I suppose, but even this is problematic. I would have to watch the kids, which under normal circumstances would be fine. However, my job--which is mostly an 8:30 to 5:00 operation--can sometimes require unpredictable travel. My boss--who works 250 miles from my office--has been known to give me just a few days notice to come to see him. And sometimes he comes to town, and when he does, the workday often lasts until 10 or so at night. (On one occasion, just to show how decent a man he is, he ordered pizza for my wife and son and had it delivered because he knew how long we would be there.) The point is, a part-time job for my wife would be very hard to schedule hours for, given the nature of my job.
So this leaves me to bring home the bacon. Well, unfortunately, the salary I make is not enough to pay our bills as it is, much less give to the church or put down debt. I have told my boss this, and I truly believe that he is sympathetic and would like to help, but I sincerely believe that if he were to help like he would otherwise like to, it would be a strain on him and would still not be enough to support us.
And so, I have a sense of dissatisfaction. I don't feel like I can support my family in this job, but I don't know of anywhere else I can go.* Plus, my wife is miserable in this town. The other homeschool moms do not talk to her when they have get togethers. On one occasion, one mom was supposed to pick her up to take her to a mom's night out. She stood her up, and never emailed or called to explain why. Because our daughter is not nursery trained, my wife has decided to stay at home and keep her while I take our son to church--and even then that is sporatic as we have only one or two weekends per month in which to visit the grandparents.
I'm actually starting to smile when I think about how minor these problems are compared to what some people are going through. I'm underpaid but working for a guy I respect and who respects me; some people haven't got that. But in truth and fact, if I don't see a change financially, I will sink in the next several months.
I'm mentioning this now because its that time of the year where we are getting our performance evaluations--where the boss wants to talk about our future with the organization. Meetings start this week. I just don't feel like sitting through a bunch of meetings about how our company is doing if I don't really want to stay much longer.
I do have one lead for a new job, but its in the works. Basically, someone I know is starting a company of sorts and he may want me to help him with the operation. But I don't know when this will be up and running, or if the man is serious about bringing me along. Of course, this gives me hope--I would really like to do that kind of work. But at the same time, I dont' feel like finding something else if, shortly thereafter, I will be changing jobs again to take the thing I really want.
If you have any advice or prayers, it would be appreciated. Again, my concerns are trivial compared to what others are going through, but at the same time, I am eager for a change. Thanks
About a year ago, I was working for a gentleman who, well, let's just say had some issues. Dealing with his issues (while my wife was expecting a baby, no less) caused me much grief. My blood pressure jumped 20 points, and I probably came as close as I have ever come to having a nervous breakdown. (I may not have been that close in objective terms, but I was certainly closer.) Eventually, he closed his business.
After my former boss closed his business, his best friend took over his book of business and hired me. Like a fixture, I went with the business. My family relocated about 120 miles up the road to a town where we had no real connections. In all of our moves, my wife said that she felt the least excited about this one. In her words, this was a survival move.
With that back story, please understand that I have a great deal of respect and brotherly love for my boss. (Actually, I have two bosses, both of whom I think a lot about.) But I have a strong dissatisfaction about my current situation. Am I being ungrateful? Am I walking in an unscriptural form of discontent? Please tell me if you can.
At present, my wife does not work. We have an infant daughter for whom we have no person we can trust to watch were my wife to begin working. (Again we have no connections in this town.) Even if we did, my wife is committed to homeschooling our son, who is nine and dyslexic. My wife is trained as a schoolteacher, and she is good with our boy. Besides, the schools around here are so strapped for cash that she couldn't get a teaching job if she wanted as there has been serious talk of closing certain public schools for budget reasons.
Of course, she could, get a part-time job working at Wal-Mart, I suppose, but even this is problematic. I would have to watch the kids, which under normal circumstances would be fine. However, my job--which is mostly an 8:30 to 5:00 operation--can sometimes require unpredictable travel. My boss--who works 250 miles from my office--has been known to give me just a few days notice to come to see him. And sometimes he comes to town, and when he does, the workday often lasts until 10 or so at night. (On one occasion, just to show how decent a man he is, he ordered pizza for my wife and son and had it delivered because he knew how long we would be there.) The point is, a part-time job for my wife would be very hard to schedule hours for, given the nature of my job.
So this leaves me to bring home the bacon. Well, unfortunately, the salary I make is not enough to pay our bills as it is, much less give to the church or put down debt. I have told my boss this, and I truly believe that he is sympathetic and would like to help, but I sincerely believe that if he were to help like he would otherwise like to, it would be a strain on him and would still not be enough to support us.
And so, I have a sense of dissatisfaction. I don't feel like I can support my family in this job, but I don't know of anywhere else I can go.* Plus, my wife is miserable in this town. The other homeschool moms do not talk to her when they have get togethers. On one occasion, one mom was supposed to pick her up to take her to a mom's night out. She stood her up, and never emailed or called to explain why. Because our daughter is not nursery trained, my wife has decided to stay at home and keep her while I take our son to church--and even then that is sporatic as we have only one or two weekends per month in which to visit the grandparents.
I'm actually starting to smile when I think about how minor these problems are compared to what some people are going through. I'm underpaid but working for a guy I respect and who respects me; some people haven't got that. But in truth and fact, if I don't see a change financially, I will sink in the next several months.
I'm mentioning this now because its that time of the year where we are getting our performance evaluations--where the boss wants to talk about our future with the organization. Meetings start this week. I just don't feel like sitting through a bunch of meetings about how our company is doing if I don't really want to stay much longer.
I do have one lead for a new job, but its in the works. Basically, someone I know is starting a company of sorts and he may want me to help him with the operation. But I don't know when this will be up and running, or if the man is serious about bringing me along. Of course, this gives me hope--I would really like to do that kind of work. But at the same time, I dont' feel like finding something else if, shortly thereafter, I will be changing jobs again to take the thing I really want.
If you have any advice or prayers, it would be appreciated. Again, my concerns are trivial compared to what others are going through, but at the same time, I am eager for a change. Thanks
