Things are going well between me and my friend, Yan. He called me from the subway in Chicago while he was visiting his parents. He wanted to let me know it wasn't very windy in the Windy City. He emailed me last night to let me know he got back into town safely.
I told my mother about him, because keeping it a secret from my best friend (next to Jesus Christ) was tearing me up inside. I let her know that we met online as penpals and conversed via email for awhile before exchanging phone numbers. With my past history of meeting guys online and then sleeping with them on the first date, obviously my mother was skeptical. I assured her I am thoroughly understanding of her skepticism. I let her know that God has made me a changed woman and I have no desire to engage in the activities that I used to and that Yan and I are just friends. She said, "honey, why don't you think I want you to have friends?". I explained that I knew this guy had two aspects working against him - we met online and he's Chinese. She said that she was only hoping, being from a strict Asian upbringing, that he wouldn't be put off by mine and my family's straightforwardness. I told her we are just friends and nothing more would come of it unless it was God's will and it was a long time from now. I'm not even attempting to look ahead that far and make plans. It's just nice to have a Christian friend from a fascinating culture. She said, "don't you believe your father and I want you to find the right man for you?" I told her I knew that's what they wanted for me.
Right now I'm just trying not to rush into things or give him the impression that we're more than what we are - just friends. He wants us to have coffee this weekend, if his work schedule permits it. I would only want to go during the day, and I would pay for my own coffee, as I feel an evening excursion with him picking up the tab would seem like a date when it wouldn't be. I let my mother know I am holding firm to my convictions about conventional dating and do not feel comfortable with dinners and evening outings as those are typically "date" settings. When you're friends with someone you do lunch or go to a museum together. It's not often we have romantic candlelit dinners with our friends.
Anyway, the "confession" went much better than I had anticipated. Now my aim is to edify Christ and prove to my parents that I am a changed woman in Christ and that this isn't just another bad situation I've gotten myself into. It won't be easy, as my past has somewhat diminished the trust and confidence my parents once had in me, but it will be worth the extra effort if I can prove myself worthy in God's sight by glorifying Him in my every thought, word, and action and also prove to my parents that I am not the same woman I used to be.
I told my mother about him, because keeping it a secret from my best friend (next to Jesus Christ) was tearing me up inside. I let her know that we met online as penpals and conversed via email for awhile before exchanging phone numbers. With my past history of meeting guys online and then sleeping with them on the first date, obviously my mother was skeptical. I assured her I am thoroughly understanding of her skepticism. I let her know that God has made me a changed woman and I have no desire to engage in the activities that I used to and that Yan and I are just friends. She said, "honey, why don't you think I want you to have friends?". I explained that I knew this guy had two aspects working against him - we met online and he's Chinese. She said that she was only hoping, being from a strict Asian upbringing, that he wouldn't be put off by mine and my family's straightforwardness. I told her we are just friends and nothing more would come of it unless it was God's will and it was a long time from now. I'm not even attempting to look ahead that far and make plans. It's just nice to have a Christian friend from a fascinating culture. She said, "don't you believe your father and I want you to find the right man for you?" I told her I knew that's what they wanted for me.
Right now I'm just trying not to rush into things or give him the impression that we're more than what we are - just friends. He wants us to have coffee this weekend, if his work schedule permits it. I would only want to go during the day, and I would pay for my own coffee, as I feel an evening excursion with him picking up the tab would seem like a date when it wouldn't be. I let my mother know I am holding firm to my convictions about conventional dating and do not feel comfortable with dinners and evening outings as those are typically "date" settings. When you're friends with someone you do lunch or go to a museum together. It's not often we have romantic candlelit dinners with our friends.
Anyway, the "confession" went much better than I had anticipated. Now my aim is to edify Christ and prove to my parents that I am a changed woman in Christ and that this isn't just another bad situation I've gotten myself into. It won't be easy, as my past has somewhat diminished the trust and confidence my parents once had in me, but it will be worth the extra effort if I can prove myself worthy in God's sight by glorifying Him in my every thought, word, and action and also prove to my parents that I am not the same woman I used to be.
