Practice what you hear

[ydouxist]

A farmer was walking home from Sunday services
When his neighbor asked him if he was coming from church.
He replied, yes. It was a good sermon too. Really? Tell me about it.
Well pastor said if you had extra food Jesus said you're to give your neighbor some.
And if you have 2 coats you're to give one away.
An if you had 2 horses and your neighbor didn't have one you're to give him one.
The neighbor was very impressed. He said You mean if you had extra food you reckon you'de give me some??
He said. Yep. If'n you had 2 coats an I didn't have one you'de give me one?? Yes sir I would.
If.'n you had 2 horses an I didn't have one you'de give me one?? Well I suppose I would.
If'n you had 2 pigs you'de give me one?? He said,"Now Emmitt that aint fair, you know I got two hogs!!"

 

[TheOriginalWhitehorse]

Classic! I loved it.

 

[Light Keeper]

Greetings,
Was this the same chyrch?

During a sermon one Sunday, the pastor heard two teenage girls in the back giggling and disturbing people. He interrupted his sermon about halfway through, and announced sternly and very loud: "There are two of you here
who have not heard a word I've said."

That quieted them down.

When the service was over, he went out to greet people at the front door. Three different adults apologized for going to sleep in church, promising it would never happen again.

 

[ydouxist]

I believe it was.