Potty training my son. HELP!

[neveragainindarkness]

Anything would help right now. I am trying (and have been for about 4 months) to potty train my son. He is 3 years old, will be 4 in February. I know I shouldn't amke such a big deal out of it right now, but he seems like he is ready. He has an extreme interest in pull-ups, has concentrated urine, has some kind of movement about every 4 hours or so, and is really intelligent. My problem, everytime I ask him if he needs to potty he screams, "NO WAY!" and runs. I take him in the bathroom and he screams. He isn't afraid of his potty or anything is the bathroom...we have at least established that in the last month. He isn't having seperation anxiety from anything he "makes". (Can you tell I have been deep into the parenting books?) We tried the once upon a potty books, videos, etc. Bear in the Big Blue House didn't do it either. I even told him Larry Boy uses the potty too but he shrugged me off.

Basically, I could use some awesome tips on potty training. ANYTHING is welcome! Thanks,

 

[Karl - Liberal Backslider]

Anything would help right now. I am trying (and have been for about 4 months) to potty train my son. He is 3 years old, will be 4 in February. I know I shouldn't amke such a big deal out of it right now, but he seems like he is ready. He has an extreme interest in pull-ups, has concentrated urine, has some kind of movement about every 4 hours or so, and is really intelligent. My problem, everytime I ask him if he needs to potty he screams, "NO WAY!" and runs. I take him in the bathroom and he screams. He isn't afraid of his potty or anything is the bathroom...we have at least established that in the last month. He isn't having seperation anxiety from anything he "makes". (Can you tell I have been deep into the parenting books?) We tried the once upon a potty books, videos, etc. Bear in the Big Blue House didn't do it either. I even told him Larry Boy uses the potty too but he shrugged me off.

Basically, I could use some awesome tips on potty training. ANYTHING is welcome! Thanks,

Have you asked him why he won't use the potty?

 

[neveragainindarkness]

I have asked him and he says it is "dumb" then runs out of the room. It is almost like he is embarrased.

 

[Karl - Liberal Backslider]

I have asked him and he says it is "dumb" then runs out of the room. It is almost like he is embarrased.

Is it possible he's conscious that you don't use it, and do your - erm - toilet activities in private, so doesn't see why he would want to do it publicly on a potty? What would he think about using the toilet like grown-up does?

One possibility is getting a child's toilet seat - perhaps like this: http://shop.store.yahoo.com/kidsstuff/n141-pottypal.html

I'm no child psychologist - this is just a thought.

 

[Etharia]

I know quite a few people who had the same problem with their sons. The put their sons in just underwear and after having urine run down their legs a few time, they were willing to use the toilet.

 

[neveragainindarkness]

You know, I have never thought of that. I did try cloth diapers for a while thinking he would feel the wetness and all, but they make cloth diapers too nice anymore. LOL! I might try this one! Thanks!

 

[TCapp]

I went through something similiar with my 3 year old. The problem was is that she never felt wet due to those absorbent paper diapers. She never associated a full bladder with any feeling of wetness a short time later. So I put her in cloth training pants. After cleaning up 2 weeks worth of messes (not fun), she started to figure the connection. Now she knows when she needs to go and she loves going to the potty.


I've also seen, but haven't tried, Dr. Phil's one-day potty training method. It involves an anatomically (I know I didn't spell that right... I'll edit this post later) peeing doll and putting the child on the potty 9 times during that one day. They start to get used to feeling their peeing muscles. Could give it a look-see, anyhow.

 

[Wolseley]

Keep encouraging him, but if he doesn't co-operate, just leave him be and keep trying.

I guarantee that after the first week or less of kindergarten, while every other kid is dry and comfortable and making fun "the little baby" who wets his pants and has to sit in it all day long, he will be potty trained.

It sounds mean, but sometimes it's the only thing that works.

 

[Etharia]

No, no, no. I disagree completely. You don't allow kids to do whatever they feel like just because they don't cooperate. Five years old is entirely too old to still be in diapers. Encoureage him, but don't stop trying.

 

[BeanMak]

LOL.. "Dr. Phil's one day method"
That method has been around for 20 years. Actually, it was helpful for me in training my 2 boys to take 2 days of time, no out side distraction, and concentrate on only that. One help is to really PUSH fluids, make sure during this training time that he drinks LOTS, you want him to go often during that day, and get rewarded. It also can help if he can watch your husband go to the bathroom; he might get a better idea of what is the process. Put a piece of toilet paper in the toilet and see if he can sink it.
Also, it is a good idea about getting rid of the diapers, and giving him new big boy pants- not pull ups, only use those at night. It will be messy a couple of times, but he will get the idea
And keep in mind, eventually he will be in college, and then it will be his roommates problem

 

[neveragainindarkness]

Hahahahahahahhaha!!!!!!!

Wow, thank you for all the helpful hints. I am a a little edgy about cleaning up all those messes, but I am going to let him pick out a new pack of underwear, and start just underwear next week. We have 2 packs of pull-ups waiting for him too. Pray that this somehow works!

 

[Beckijhn]

I want to second the underwear thing. My boy was going to be kicked out of daycare at three (a very small one with my good friend as a second mama) because three year olds have to be in the big kid area and no diapers are allowed there.

I put him in underwear for a week or so and boy howdy he learned fast. The next step was teaching him what and what not to pee on. LOL He found out he had control and liked aiming it at everything!

 

[lucypevensie]

I'll also second the cloth underwear. Also when there is an accident have him be resposible to do the cleaning up (help him of course) and have him change his own clothes (again provide help). That way he can have 2 choices:
1. go potty neatly and quickly in the toilet -or-
2. pee in the pants and then have to deal with a big mess.

 

[Etharia]

While working at a daycare, we had a three year old who would not use the bathroom. We started making him clean and change himself afterward and he soon started using the toilet.

 

[TCapp]

Yep, take all the fun and pampering (no pun intented) out of using their pants as a toilet, and they'll decide it's not worth it pretty fast.