please help i'm sinking fast!

[rocktheballad]

ok, so i have this situation. I've loved this guy for a year now, and we've been nothing but best friends since I met him. 3 days ago, he tells m he likes me a lot and wants to try dating. So we do, and I'm at a very vulnerable spot. We've kissed a few times and gotten a little carried away.

I know that the best way to combat everything in a relationship is to be honest and truthful. My question is how much should you discuss lust and anything sexual in a relationship? It is ok to tell him I'm struggling with desire for him and praying about it? Or is that where my best girlfriends come in? ack, I'm lost.

 

[E-beth]

Hmmm...

My first thought is, if you are mature enough to struggle with sexual thought and deed, you are mature enough to talk about it honestly. But before you approach him with your thoughts, you have to search your heart and ask for God's guidance in what He wants you to do or not do. And what you are willing to do to stay away from sin.

It seems that your relationship went to the physical side way fast. In three days time you are already struggling with sexuality. My advice there is to remember that once you go too far, you can't go back again and it is wayyy hard to retreat.

I am praying for you. It isn't easy. But with God's help, you can keep your focus where it should be and He will bless you.

 

[desi]

Its too soon for going fast or talking deeply. Go on group dates for a few months.

 

[Johnnz]

Its quite normal for affection to easily slip into desire. It's just that there is a place and time for that to happen, and its not within the first week of a relationship. You have known him for a while and that may have made it a bit more natural. But if you start into more than kissing you soon move into an area of constantly changing boundaries. It often suprises young people how fast they get to the place of no boundaries.

You are not odd, or bad. Just normal, healthy and needing to be wise.

John
NZ

 

[MagicStar723]

Its too soon for going fast or talking deeply. Go on group dates for a few months.

I agree completely. I think that telling him you're struggling would just open up more problems.

 

[pegatha]

I know that the best way to combat everything in a relationship is to be honest and truthful.

Being truthful in a relationship is not the same thing as compromising your personal privacy and/or modesty, which is what I think you'd be risking if you told your BF. I agree with Desi & MagicStar on this one.

 

[rocktheballad]

cool, thanks a lot guys. it is way hard just because i have been his best friend for so long. but yah, we talked appropriately and decided accountability is our friend! so thanks, i'll keep people posted!