So, I've been blessed enough to have a bouncing 10 year old girl ( my little sister-in-law) placed in my life. I'm not so inexperienced that I don't know about children...I have lots of younger siblings because I come from a family of nine. Trouble is, I've never been responsible for any of them before and now I am. Little Rhiannon is a sweet, adorable little girl but is going through a trauma I cannot even fathom. She lost her mother suddenly in August. She is staying with us temporarily until her dad can get back on his feet. This wonderful man is struggling with 2 sons still at home and since Rhiannon is close to Justin (My husband,)it just felt natural for us to offer to take her.
This past week has been tough...I know Rhiannon is mourning as is Justin ...and we are trying to help her process everything but she is acting out something terrible. She has yelled at us, threw things at us, had temper tantrums and more. Friday she openly defied Justin and ran across the street nearly being hit by an oncoming car! He was beside himself when he brought her home and it took alot for me to talk him down.
I guess in wondering what is appropriate to do when it comes to discipline?
My heart breaks for her so I tend to be overly permissive, but somehow I feel she needs so much grace and love right now. I just haven't the heart to be firm with her. My way is gentle and talking kindly even when she shouts at me which is not easy. Suddenly, I feel a whole new appreciation for my parents.
My husband and I differ a bit on this...and he tends to be more firm and less emotional I guess, which upsets me. He says that we still need to set firm boundaries even if she's grieving. I don't think sending her to her room, essentially isolating her from us, or swatting her is appropriate. Right now she needs us to help her gain control because she has lost so much. Justin's dad, her dad, says she is just being a brat. I don't agree. Am I wrong?
Most couples start with a baby. Haha
Anyway....any thoughts?
This past week has been tough...I know Rhiannon is mourning as is Justin ...and we are trying to help her process everything but she is acting out something terrible. She has yelled at us, threw things at us, had temper tantrums and more. Friday she openly defied Justin and ran across the street nearly being hit by an oncoming car! He was beside himself when he brought her home and it took alot for me to talk him down.
I guess in wondering what is appropriate to do when it comes to discipline?
My heart breaks for her so I tend to be overly permissive, but somehow I feel she needs so much grace and love right now. I just haven't the heart to be firm with her. My way is gentle and talking kindly even when she shouts at me which is not easy. Suddenly, I feel a whole new appreciation for my parents.
My husband and I differ a bit on this...and he tends to be more firm and less emotional I guess, which upsets me. He says that we still need to set firm boundaries even if she's grieving. I don't think sending her to her room, essentially isolating her from us, or swatting her is appropriate. Right now she needs us to help her gain control because she has lost so much. Justin's dad, her dad, says she is just being a brat. I don't agree. Am I wrong?
Most couples start with a baby. Haha
Anyway....any thoughts?