Opinion please?

[inmercysgrasp]

Hi. I was wondering if maybe some of you could read this article, and give me your opinion on it. Any editing,review. Does it make sense? Is it written badly? Thank you for taking the time to do so..

I wanted so much to belong, to fit in. As I did in

Middle School, so I did now.

Those same feelings of rejection and isolation

surged up, but I tried not to let it

show.

I was living with two roommates, Melissa* and

Shannon.* As is often the case

when three roommates live together, it seems

three can be a crowd- and I often

found myself the third wheel.

Melissa tried hard to include me, but it became

more and more obvious that

Shannon favored Melissa’s friendship over my own.

I tried to change that, but

seemingly to no avail. If Shannon had a favorite

show to watch, I’d offer to watch it

with her. If Shannon was going to a tennis match,

I’d be there to cheer her on. If

Shannon was sick with a cold, I’d offer to get her

chicken noodle soup (vegetarian

though I was), to get her to feeling better. But

despite all my attempts, it seemed to

add up to nothing in the grand scheme of it all.

To make it worse, Melissa, who had been witnessing

all my attempts and feeling

bad for me, also felt somewhat in the middle of it,

wanting to be with both of us, yet

knowing it wasn’t always possible. My work shift

didn’t always permit me to be

home when they were, hence sometimes they

would go out during the day to the

mall, to grab a bite to eat, and I would come home,

feeling left out, and feeling like I

would look foolish if I let anyone know it. After all,

what could one say- I can’t

believe you went to Taco Bell without me?

Perhaps I should clarify this a little more before

continuing. Prior to rooming

together, Shannon and Melissa and I were pretty

close. I met Shannon first, and

later introduced her to Melissa. As the three of us

Continued our friendship, we later decided upon

being roommates.

At first, I was glad my two friends were getting so

close. But the more I saw their

closeness, the more I felt distanced from it, from

this almost family like bond they

shared.

So on I continued, wearing this protective shell

around me, trying to be careful to

let no one see how hurt I was. I even tried to hide

the pain from myself, sometimes

not facing the deep emotions that were hidden

within.

One particular day stands out in my mind. I came

home from work, and Melissa

and Shannon were in the next room, and hadn’t

heard me come in. I heard Melissa

saying something like, "why don’t you just give her

a chance", and then Shannon’s

reply of, "I just don’t like her."

I don’t know exactly how to describe what I felt at

that moment, but I guess one

can imagine it wasn’t a good feeling. I quietly

opened the door again, then shut it

loudly, and with a smile went to the back room to

let my presence known.

Not long after that though I began to change. To

give up, in a sense. After that I

slowed from trying so hard to win Shannon’s

friendship-to reason over how I even

lost in the first place.

Escaping to the park one day, I cried out to the

Lord. I told Him what I was

feeling, told Him the deep pain I was in. And

realized I couldn’t change someone

else, couldn’t make them love me. Again and again

I found myself escaping to little

places )my car, parks etc), and just giving over all

those hurt feelings to the Lord. I

remember telling the Lord I didn’t want to hurt like

this anymore.

I let go, and let God.

That’s when things started to change.

I became more honest with myself, with people, as

I didn’t try to hide so hard to

put on a mask before others. Continually giving my

burdens to the Lord gave me a

strength I hadn’t expected. I wasn’t focused so

much anymore on Shannon as I was

on simply doing the tasks before me, and focusing

on God. As I did so, it seemed for

some reason Shannon began to focus more on me.

Coming to me more, approaching

me first, asking for my help in small things-I began

to notice a change in our

relationship.

I remember one day, when Shannon and I were

alone, that she brought up to me

how sorry she was for the way our friendship had

gone. I told her I was sorry too. I

remember that she didn’t say anything for a few

moments, then, with tears in her

eyes, reached our her arms to me and gave me a

hug. Later that night, after Melissa

came home from a friends house, Shannon, who

had not been baptized by

immersion before, told us that she wanted to be

baptized.

I could bring up numerous other accounts of similar

events, testifying to the sweet

moments of reconciliation that began to take place,

but I think you probably get the

point.

There were times, as I went through these internal

conflicts, that I wondered if I

ever made God feel the same way I felt, wondered

if He ever simply wanted to be my

friend, and yet I would choose other things or

people instead of Him. I wondered if

it hurt Him, those times when I would come home

and find my roommates gone,

that rather than be thankful to have quiet time to

be with Him in prayer, I’d instead

reflect over hurt feelings.

I’m not sure still of that….

But I think what I do know is this: that things

change, hurts heal, and love

blossoms, when you let go, and let God.

( Some names and events changed to protect privacy"

 

[mushowani]

sounds so good to me and its a great lesson on friendship. jealousy and attention seeking are the things that ruin most friendship but it is unconditional love that conquers.

 

[mushowani]

the piece is an eye opener... a masterpiece and sing of what bitterness, jealous, and love can do to a relationship
in the face of adversity smile
smile coz Jesus loves you
smile for it takes a simple act of love to mend broken fences, to build bridges, to set the world ablaze with true friendship....