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SOLDOUT4HIM
Guest
gsmithcat, good way to categorize. We do do that alota times though. 
We don't do it intentionally or anything, but...
We don't do it intentionally or anything, but...
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One for the men?
- Thread starter Sascha Fitzpatrick
- Start date
Out of the Flames
Well-Known Member
Hahaha....who says jaded can't be hilarious? Oh, hun, you and me should talk sometime.OhhJim said:
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Mr Morning
God's 'Work In Progress'
Whoa, what's wrong with marrying a spontaneous person? Is it cause they'd be too 'difficult' in the end? I'm sorry if I maight be taking it the wrong way, but everyone deserves someone if we just gave up on all the unreliable people...well, there wouldn't be many people left ot date. You shouldn't love and marry someone cause they're easy to love. You should marry someone because you love them, no matter what. You just...love them.OhhJim said:
You love them no matter what they do because you just love them.
Isn't that the way Jesus taught us to love each other? He puts up with us, all of us, even though we're foolish, rebellious, and otherwise sinful. But He still loves us. It should be the same kind of love we should have for the person we marry. Marraige is a commitment. That commitment is based on love. True love. Unconditional love.
Oops, sorry, little rant there. You may return to your regularly scheduled discussion...
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OhhJim
Often wrong, but never in doubt
Well, sure, I'd love to. How many women have you dated?Out of the Flames said:Hahaha....who says jaded can't be hilarious? Oh, hun, you and me should talk sometime.
Yeah, once you're married. Hopefully, you don't marry them if they are flaky. Is your wife easy to love, Mr Morning?Mr Morning said:
If you'll read my post, you'll see I didn't say there was anything wrong with marrying a spontaneous person. Perhaps you had a knee-jerk reaction to something I said?
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Mr Morning
God's 'Work In Progress'
Sure, I guess, lol. I guess my point is that even some poeple who are 'reliable' all the time could be marriage material, too. You just gotta be more patient, I guess.OhhJim said:
And, I'm not married yet, pfffft, I'm not even dating(shows how much you should listen to me, eh?
),
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You should marry someone who will respect the commitment of marriage, that the person is unreliable implies the person may not. Commitment only makes sense assuming some degree of reliability, the spouses need to be reliably faithful to each otherMr Morning said:
I'm not sure a completely unreliable person understands commitment and in the least probably isn't ready for commitment.
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After reading that, I'm wondering if some people are confusing 'spontaneity' with 'unreliability'...
Just cos someone is spontaneous doesn't mean they are unreliable. I'm not saying spontaneity is always healthy either, but neither is complete and utter predictability.
I wouldn't want to marry someone who I couldn't rely on to be able to do things when I need them done, but I also hope to marry someone with a spontaneous spirit - I love leaving the weekend as unplanned as possible, so that if we feel like jumping in the car and spontaneously going to Mooloolaba - we can!
Sasch
Just cos someone is spontaneous doesn't mean they are unreliable. I'm not saying spontaneity is always healthy either, but neither is complete and utter predictability.
I wouldn't want to marry someone who I couldn't rely on to be able to do things when I need them done, but I also hope to marry someone with a spontaneous spirit - I love leaving the weekend as unplanned as possible, so that if we feel like jumping in the car and spontaneously going to Mooloolaba - we can!
Sasch
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I'll agree spontaneous and unreliable aren't necessarily the same, I think this subthread originally got started with alleged instability of the spontaneous and adventureous types. These types could be poor spouses if they refuse to control their behavior, to accept limitations on their freedom of action at any given moment, as be spontaneous is to act seemingly outside of protocol, pattern, etc. So commitments actually reduce the spontaneity, since the spontaneous actions are not completely without a controls outside of themselves (the commitments), and I think spontaneous people value their spontaneity (otherwise, why would they be spontaneous?) thus it's possible they'd have a rather antagonistic approach to commitment.Sascha Fitzpatrick said:
All that said, I think spontaneity is harmless if it's done more for someone elses amusement rather than your own, or alternatively if spontaneity is only valued within constraints (which I think may imply a more "artifical" than "natural" form of spontaneity
)
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OhhJim
Often wrong, but never in doubt
I think we've gotten away from the point. It's not whether that idiot OhhJim's definition of "spontaneous" has any validity, it's whether, and why, men tend to categorize women in certain ways. I only tried to clarify, and it seems I clouded the waters a bit. Each word has a different meaning to each of us.
Anyway, I'm only speaking of my own experience. If you all know dozens of fun, stable women, I certainly would think of claiming you don't. It's just that I don't.
Anyway, I'm only speaking of my own experience. If you all know dozens of fun, stable women, I certainly would think of claiming you don't. It's just that I don't.
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