Old japan

[Bruyas]

Thanks for suggestions. I will try anything, smiling is a foreign concept now, I give food to homeless, not sure what to volunteer. And you are right, I feel alone in this since everyone else doesn't have these problems, if I knew others had the issue s, I probably wouldn't feel like this, but I am completely isolated on this issue. Thanks

Hi Bruyas,

Sometimes when I'm driving or doing yardwork I like to listen to online playlists I've created made up of classic 60s rock and folk, as I am a classic rock musician. But during the times I feel vulnerable and on edge I sense a nudging in my spirit to put aside worldly influences because I need nourishment. Unpleasant thoughts of hurtful words and actions by others come to mind causing tendencies toward depression, revenge, self pity, a myriad of other things to bring me down.

I then choose to listen to the Book of Psalms, Proverbs, or any book of Scripture via a venue such as Youtube. Some of these are KJV, but there are other contemporary free versions like NIV.

Psalms is particularly good to listen to when I am depressed. Don't do it for a distraction, or "white noise", but really listen, as if God's personal love letter is being read just for your ears. Own it; it's for YOU!

Of course, reading is always good, too. But I choose to read and study Scripture at the end of my day.

Sons of Korah is a group I love to listen to. We all have our favorites. These singers/musicians often put the Psalms to music in a pleasing easy listening way. Psalm 95 is my favorite. Psalm 69 is about depression, as are many others. Again, the key is to really listen and believe what is said.

Talk to God, as He is your Creator. There isn't anything He doesn't already know; He can't be bluffed or fooled. Express your anger or frustration with Him about things: your life, how you feel, whatever. He can take it.

Think about what you DO have in the way of blessings. Count them...even the little things. They mount up fast.

Express your love for our Creator; He has made nature a beautiful work of art. Plants and animals.... intricate and detailed. The human body...awesome! Everything is in it's place......except humans....a truly rebellious lot.

Make a sincere attempt to do something. Volunteer. Smile at people; exchange pleasantries in a sincere manner. Somebody is always hurting worse than we are. I have often been led to pray with people, sometime virtual strangers, descreetly, because it's often emotional and personal. I ran into this a lot in my 28 years as a truck driver pulling tankers & also working for UPS. Met all kinds of folks all over the 48 states. We are all the same. Then sometimes, oh man, I would be driving my truck so sad and sometimes in tears.....about.....I have no idea. Both needed and being in need at different times. Depression.

Sitting/lying around is very detrimental when depressed, but it's a natural inclination. Try not to give in.

Get plenty of rest. Don't try to solve everybody's problems and don't be a dumping ground for their own unhappiness with life.

Be kind, but guard your heart. Don't let your kindness be taken for weakness. Evil is everywhere.

Even in your frustration/anger you realize how much you love Him and want to KNOW your Lifegiver, not just ABOUT Him. We see through the glass darkly, as Scripture says. We can't fathom God; we know so little yet try to form religion and doctrine around our meager understanding. Religion has little value to me.

Sorry for the ramble. I've been thinking a lot about your posts. Take my meager offerings as the musings of an older man who has lived through a lot...and I'm still here relatively intact. Take what you can use; discard the rest. A bit later I will PM some Scripture to help you with times of depression if you are set up to receive PMs. Blessings.

 

[Press On]

Thanks for suggestions. I will try anything, smiling is a foreign concept now, I give food to homeless, not sure what to volunteer. And you are right, I feel alone in this since everyone else doesn't have these problems, if I knew others had the issue s, I probably wouldn't feel like this, but I am completely isolated on this issue. Thanks

I volunteer for Meals on Wheels once or twice a month. Deliver hot or frozen meals to shut-ins. Small town so nothing more than 3 or 4 miles from my house. Deliver 6 or 7 meals to the same folks-takes about an hour.

Also volunteer at the food pantry run by the Methodist Church though I don't attend church. Pick up Walmart food 5 days a week (though usually only twice a month on my scheduled crew). Usually 3 pallets of perfectly good food that would otherwise be composted. I'm the "kid" at 63. Most of the guys volunteering are 70s and 80s so I do most of the heavy lifting . Some days take groceries to the disabled-about 2x a month. Every Friday I am on the receiving end getting groceries from the food bank if it's a tough week.(A good example of praising God for the little things like this provision!) Doesn't take a lot of time per month and gets me off my rear end even if I don't feel like it because people are depending on me.

 

[Bruyas]

Thats good. Hopefully, when I have some income, I will do it to o

 

[Kristen.NewCreation]

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[MissRowy]

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[faroukfarouk]

Hi Bruyas,

You've had excellent advices already, but perhaps something from my experience would be of encouragement to you

I went through a difficult break-up couple years ago but I've always been able to bounce back very easily, so I thought that I would recover quickly. I turned to alcohol, partying and casual relationships to numb my pain but somehow this time nothing worked. I didn't realise it at that time, but I was digging a dark hole for myself. Then very subtly, the thoughts crept into my mind. I could be simply waiting for the traffic light, and my mind would say, "Go on, just dash across. The cars are fast enough. Your problems would be solved." Or I could be taking some sleeping pills, and I would be tempted to "just take a few more and I'd never have to wake up again". I read through one of the journal entries I wrote at that time and it says "people tell me to stay strong. how can I possibly win when I'm the one who wants to kill myself?" The only reason I did not go ahead was because I had a young child. Though many times I thought of taking him along with me.

I isolated myself from all my friends. Ironically, because deep down I was desperately calling for help. But no one around me really knew how bad it was. Not a single person. And no one knew all the terrible things I did during that period of time. The pills from the psychiatrist made things slightly better, and my sessions with the psychologist were helpful, but very minimal. I recovered only after I started attending my current church. It took me merely about 2 weeks to be confident enough to stop my pills and counselling. During these 2 weeks, I constantly surrounded myself with messages (devotionals, sermons or music) that speaks of Jesus' love for me. I clung onto it for dear life and I'm convinced that it is His love that healed me. I believe it will for you too.

Thinking back, it was this dark season in my life that made me appreciate the steadfast love of Christ and it helped me recognise how desperate I am for a saviour. I did not had a strong support system. I kept my illness from my family (typical Asian family, no one talks about feelings. Taboo). My friends tried, but didn't understand. Eventually I got so sick of it then I decided not to meet like half of my friends. And I'm an introvert so my number of friends isn't very high in the first place. And this is not a good idea.

The best thing you can do for yourself is to find at least one person whom you trust, is able to understand what you're going through, and you'd have to be accountable to this person. Pray. Pray A LOT. Listen to sermons that focuses on God's love for you. God is close to the broken-hearted.

You have taken the first step to recovery by asking for help. You WILL get you here, soon enough. Take care and God bless. Fighting! Precious warrior of Christ. He holds you and will carry you through this.

Great post. Trust is the key. Proverbs 3.5