Okie Dokie

[reformedthinker]

I've tried reading the other post, but come on. I don't believe I was born gay. I have tried to change, and have experience some liberty from it when I was in alot of active good holy fellowship with my brothers at church. When I don't have that, I'm easy prey for homosexual temptations. I am not proud of what I have done. And do not condone homosexual behaviors. Regardless it is not pleasing to God. I have a good friend who is trying to get me to go through the Doors of Hope (SettingCaptivesfree.org I believe) program that helps you overcome it. He has been free from gay sexual actions for over six years, and he still struggles sometimes with looking at a guy or his package, trying to measure up with the guy, but he decided he would not touch another man again. So I think it is renewing your mind, and discipline. God rewards a faithful heart and has grace and mercy to others as He sees best.

Even if I had stronger heterosexual feelings, I still would have some troubles relating to women, because I still have some bad views of them I am trying to get over. I see them as stupid and illogical and I just don't understand the sex part with them. I don't want one to put the moves on me, and I think theres only one way for sex with a woman. So, yeah I still have other issues to address.

 

[jezic]

it can be overcome with diligence and seeking Jesus. it may not ever disappear, but it can be overcome.

If you are looking for a great organization, check out Courage.

 

[madison1101]

I understand what you are saying. What I have come to understand is that we will always face temptation. Satan knows our weaknesses, and uses them to bring us down. For me it is my loneliness and childhood sexual abuse. Those two things combined created a distorted view of sex in me that has triggered sexual sin on more than one occassion.

Because of Satan's wiliness, we will be assaulted over and over again with temptation. What we must do is stay in the Word on a daily basis, AND ask God each and every day to keep us pure and holy.

 

[jezic]

some people are called to be single as well. Marriage is not right for everyone.

 

[marianservant]

No matter what some people say they have never "overcame" their sexuality. Maybe they need to say that to affirm some inner stability and holier-than-thou sense but if you are born with homosexual tendencies you CANNOT MAKE yourself like or be sexually attracted to women. I had some statistics (if i find them again I will post them) that showed that most "recoved homosexuals that got hitches" were divorced not long after and miserable. However the Bible condemns it and so what is their to do now. I know the feeling, I mean why would God make us something evil and then not give us the ability to flee from it. Well the answer depends on your belief system. Since you believe it is an intrinsic evil I will go with that route. It isnt the thoughts that are a sin it is the actual sexual act, so even if you have a moment where you look at a man or the like it is okay as long as you try your best not to lust, not touch to homosexual fantasies and never have homosexual intercourse. This may seem like a horrible existense but trust me on this, God has plans and they may seem rocky now but they will straighten out. My opinion...do your best (no one's perfect) to avoid lust, pray and seek fellowship, and above all do not hate yourself, for Christ will NEVER hate you and truthfully, that is all that matters.
Just my humble opinion

 

[simplicity]

Life is so short to spend in grief and uncertainty. So regardless of what I or others write - and I'm not sure what exactly I am going to write - by all means spend every moment of today and the rest of your life pursing things that interest and motivate you. My message there is, there is time to sort things out along the way.

Now I had to sort these issues out myself like I think many people growing up. Be aware that emotions can be misinterpreted and subject to multiple interpretations. For instance, I used to fall in love - oh - every few months or so. This is on a hormonal level. Does being in love with a pretty face mean that the lady is destined to be my soul mate for life? No, it just means the batteries in the flashlight are fully charged. So as deep as the love might feel, I know it is sometimes more the product of youth than something fundamental.

I should explain that I am incredibly pragmatic. I was never afraid about admiring a guy for his good looks and great personality. I used to say to myself, if I ever had a son, I hope it is like this guy here. This would only be possible if he has a sister. And if the guy looks that good, dude, his sister is probably such an abundant beauty. Even today although I am a lot older I sometimes wish I had another guy's build, complexion, composure and comfort with people. The thing is, I feel it is fine to recognize these nice qualities in other guys. I know boys are trained at an early age not to look at guys in this manner. I am sure there are many reasons for this such as not to get beaten up in the locker room.

There are so many issues to sort out in life. Like I said, don't let these things bog you down. Humans will never be as prolific as aphids or fruit flies. We will never be as well endowed as various other creatures of this world. We will not last as long or grow as high as many trees. We will never have the epic grandeur of a mountain. But even a wildflower during its brief flicker on earth has its time of glory under the sun. And your clock is ticking too. So be the happiest and most wonderful you can be. I'm sure all of these other issues will not over come you.

 

[deekers]

No matter what some people say they have never "overcame" their sexuality. Maybe they need to say that to affirm some inner stability and holier-than-thou sense but if you are born with homosexual tendencies you CANNOT MAKE yourself like or be sexually attracted to women. I had some statistics (if i find them again I will post them) that showed that most "recoved homosexuals that got hitches" were divorced not long after and miserable. However the Bible condemns it and so what is their to do now. I know the feeling, I mean why would God make us something evil and then not give us the ability to flee from it. Well the answer depends on your belief system. Since you believe it is an intrinsic evil I will go with that route. It isnt the thoughts that are a sin it is the actual sexual act, so even if you have a moment where you look at a man or the like it is okay as long as you try your best not to lust, not touch to homosexual fantasies and never have homosexual intercourse. This may seem like a horrible existense but trust me on this, God has plans and they may seem rocky now but they will straighten out. My opinion...do your best (no one's perfect) to avoid lust, pray and seek fellowship, and above all do not hate yourself, for Christ will NEVER hate you and truthfully, that is all that matters.
Just my humble opinion

I agree with most of what is said in this quote. I've seen the statistics, and I've talked to people who have been through so-called "ex-gay" and "recovery" programs and they say it does not work. Tons of people drop out because they realize it doesn't work. Others try for a while, even get married. But they haven't recovered. They are still attracted to men, but don't act on those attractions. Still others live miserable, lonely lives in support groups.

So what's the answer? As stated above, "why would God make us something evil and then not give us the ability to flee from it?" The answer is simple. God does not expect us to flee from it. God would not make us go through this. Our loving, and gracious God would not separate us from the rest of humanity and curse us with something sinful that we can never shake, never correct, never recover from. I refuse to believe in a God who would.

I believe in a God who loves me just the way I am. I believe in my loving Savior, Jesus Christ, who knew as He knitted me together in my mother's womb, knew that I would be attracted to other guys. And I believe He said, "It is good." I do not believe He said, "This one will struggle all his life to overcome or avoid the sexuality I allowed him to have."

Praise God, Who has made us a rainbow of diversity.

 

[Cristiano]

I agree with most of what is said in this quote. I've seen the statistics, and I've talked to people who have been through so-called "ex-gay" and "recovery" programs and they say it does not work. Tons of people drop out because they realize it doesn't work. Others try for a while, even get married. But they haven't recovered. They are still attracted to men, but don't act on those attractions. Still others live miserable, lonely lives in support groups.

So what's the answer? As stated above, "why would God make us something evil and then not give us the ability to flee from it?" The answer is simple. God does not expect us to flee from it. God would not make us go through this. Our loving, and gracious God would not separate us from the rest of humanity and curse us with something sinful that we can never shake, never correct, never recover from. I refuse to believe in a God who would.

I believe in a God who loves me just the way I am. I believe in my loving Savior, Jesus Christ, who knew as He knitted me together in my mother's womb, knew that I would be attracted to other guys. And I believe He said, "It is good." I do not believe He said, "This one will struggle all his life to overcome or avoid the sexuality I allowed him to have."

Praise God, Who has made us a rainbow of diversity.

I am a young Christian guy who struggles with same sex attraction. You said that you believe God knew you would be attracted to guys and said it was good. He knew that you would lie sometime in your life, did he say it was good when he knitted you together? He knew that you would lust at some point in your life, did he say it was good when he knitted you together? My question is how do you reconcile how you feel as a gay Christian and passages from the new testament? I am curious, I am not being hostile. I know what it is like to feel like this was the way I was made from the beginning, but I also struggle knowing that I am born into sin. My flesh wants what is contrary to the spirit, etc. The NT seems clear on the issue. I've posted other places and I will post again. Does not God have the right to allow what he wants for his glory? Haven't you ever pleaded with God to take away your attractions to men? I have. Paul sums my struggle:

2 Corinthians 12:7-10

"To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassing great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."

God chose to allow that "thorn" in Paul's "side" to bring about His glory. That is what we are here for, to be used to demonstrate God's glory, not to glorify ourselves. I believe this passage applies to my life as a Christian man struggling with same sex attraction, but I don't believe it makes it okay to act on those struggles.

 

[deekers]

I am a young Christian guy who struggles with same sex attraction. You said that you believe God knew you would be attracted to guys and said it was good. He knew that you would lie sometime in your life, did he say it was good when he knitted you together? He knew that you would lust at some point in your life, did he say it was good when he knitted you together? My question is how do you reconcile how you feel as a gay Christian and passages from the new testament? I am curious, I am not being hostile. I know what it is like to feel like this was the way I was made from the beginning, but I also struggle knowing that I am born into sin. My flesh wants what is contrary to the spirit, etc. The NT seems clear on the issue. I've posted other places and I will post again. Does not God have the right to allow what he wants for his glory? Haven't you ever pleaded with God to take away your attractions to men? I have. Paul sums my struggle:

2 Corinthians 12:7-10

"To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassing great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."

God chose to allow that "thorn" in Paul's "side" to bring about His glory. That is what we are here for, to be used to demonstrate God's glory, not to glorify ourselves. I believe this passage applies to my life as a Christian man struggling with same sex attraction, but I don't believe it makes it okay to act on those struggles.

I hope you recieved my private message explaining my beliefs concerning those New Testament verses, Cristiano. If not, let me know and I will try again. And if anyone else wants to know, I'll gladly message you as well.

In reply, God indeed did know that I would lie and lust sometime during my life, everyone does. Everyone is tempted to do these things. Not everyone has homosexual attractions. God gave us our ability to appreciate beauty. Physical attraction is in major part due to our idea of what is beautiful. I do believe my attraction to men is God-given. I do not believe it was meant to be a thorn in my side.

 

[Sam Gamgee]

Good luck with your struggle... I hope you find joy, peace, and happiness at the end of your path...

 

[Robbie_James_Francis]

Do not try to suppress your sexuality, change it or live "despite" it. Live through it. It is a part of you and always will be. Unless you can love your entire self and accept this then you cannot be a healthy person and will, frankly, be at serious risk of being an unbalanced and messed up person.

Repression won't help matters. I'm not saying go out and have homosexual relationships...we can agree that that is sinful. But this doesn't mean you can't accept your sexuality and love yourself. It doesn't mean that you cannot express love in an ordered way.

God bless you!
Rob

 

[Steve J.]

No matter what some people say they have never "overcame" their sexuality. Maybe they need to say that to affirm some inner stability and holier-than-thou sense but if you are born with homosexual tendencies you CANNOT MAKE yourself like or be sexually attracted to women. ..................

Reading peoples minds and knowing there hearts are powers of God himself. There are those that say they have have delivered from the abomination of homosexuality by the power of Jesus and I say is AMEN! Praise Jesus! Thank you Lord for answering prayer, healing bodies, changing hearts, cleansing us of sin, and defeating the enemy! Where we are weak. He is strong!

People are not "born" homosexual anymore than they are "born" to be murderers, thieves, or rapists. These are but sin in lives that are to be rooted out and cast aside.

People fall and break. Jesus lifts and heals. The Bible says so.

 

[marknb]

Steve
It appears you have not walked in a gay christians shoes.
I have.
I have set thru S A meetings where gay christians,(ages 19 thru 59)
have cried as we struggle to deal with our sexuality.
9 of the 23 members were married.
You piously say you can change your sexual attraction.. You were given a different set of life circumstances. Psalm 139 clearly tells the Lord has directed our every
circumstance. date of birth to moment and circumstances of death.
Thanks for listening.

Mark