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Just out of curiosity, did something happen that made you feel the need to punish yourself?

For what it's worth Colossians 2:23, Paul warns against practices that appear righteous but lack true spiritual value. He mentions things like "self-abasement" or self-imposed humility.
It was done as a means of using one fear to overpower the other. With OCD most know their fears are not realistic, but the fears are still present. I discovered if I used another means to challenge the fear though a greater fear from a vow I could get past the first fear, it just ended up spiraling
 
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@LookingForward1, you cannot argue yourself out of OCD any more than you can argue yourself out of a bacterial infection.
  1. If you have not done so already, get a psychiatrist (not just a psychologist).
  2. Visit a church that is good at dealing with mental illnesses.
You’re not wrong, ironically I work in the mental health field, the ideal approach is usually exposure response prevention. I wouldn’t mind finding other forms of support though not sure about how much it would cost
 
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Sabertooth

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You’re not wrong, ironically I work in the mental health field, the ideal approach is usually exposure response prevention. I wouldn’t mind finding other forms of support though not sure about how much it would cost
Maybe as a natural strategy --which is an okay starting point-- but do you believe supernatural healing to be a valid ministry within the Church? The churches that I recommended practice such a ministry.
 
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Mike Kh

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I’ve been diagnosed with OCD at an early age and struggled with it all my life. In high school I started to develop a category of OCD referred to as scrupulosity which usually has to do with intrusive thoughts of selling my soul to the devil if I do something or buy something I want. For example I might want to buy something and have the thought “I’d sell my soul for that” at which point I wouldn’t buy it out of fear. This also branched out to everyday actions and redoing things. At some point years later maybe in college, I discovered I could counteract the fear of selling my soul by making a vow to God to punish myself if I engaged in the first fear. For example I might have a fear that if I do a specific action I’ll sell my soul or agree to sell my soul, then to counteract this I’d make a vow to God stating if I don’t do specific action then I won’t let myself engage in some activity I enjoy for some period of time, or in extreme cases I’ll ban myself from certain things completely. As time went on the selling my soul fear dissipated to some degree but the vows became more and more common and more and more extreme in response to other anxiety to the point I’d say/think “God please hold me accountable to this vow” and proceed to say that if I do or don’t do something then I’ll ban myself from certain hobbies I enjoy for months at a time. This has led to recent struggles in which I made a vow to ban myself from hobbies of mine (exercise and/or gaming which I do to spend time with a friend and destress) for several months. I had anxiety about a situation then vowed and asked to be held accountable that if I failed to do something or did something then I wouldn’t exercise/workout for some timeframe of 1-3 months. I ended up accidentally breaking the vow and I also have other vows I’m struggling with trying to determine if I broke them or not as well. I understand the concept of grace but at the same time I feel like if I do not punish myself I would be engaging in willful sin and essentially saying I value these things more than being with God and I worry about being condemned to hell if I fail to fulfill the vows. Furthermore I see it as a daily repeating sin every day that I fail to not start the punishment since I vowed to not engage in the hobbies for a certain time and this breaks the vow every day I don’t start the punishment. Even when praying about it I’ve had thoughts pop in my head saying “do it” in regards to fulfilling the vows which add more anxiety. I would appreciate thoughts on the matter. I do receive medication for the anxiety but I still struggle. Apologies for the long paragraph I just wanted to add as much context as I can.
Hi - this all sounds exactly like OCD. There are several great resources for dealing with OCD as a Christian and I'd like to share them here. (This is my first post - if I break any rules by doing this, please let me know.) Mark DeJesus (MarkDeJesus.com), Jaimie Eckert (scrupulosity.com), and Dr Ian Osborn (OCDandChristianity.com) are the best resources in my opinion. Dr Osborn is a Christian, OCD sufferer and Christian. Also, I recently published a book called "Waging War Against OCD - A Christian Approach to Victory." You can see more details at WagingWarAgainstOCD.com
 
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Mari17

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Not many outside of a few people I know, the vows actually spiraled to the point I couldn’t really keep track of them which ironically helped me let them go and not take them seriously. Outside of one new one that is slightly different from past ones
OCD can be so tough to deal with! I have had scrupulosity most of my life, and have dealt with quite a few different themes. I am happy to share some of the resources that have helped me, if you would like!
 
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Maybe as a natural strategy --which is an okay starting point-- but do you believe supernatural healing to be a valid ministry within the Church? The churches that I recommended practice such a ministry.
I cannot say I’ve been to a church that practices that.
 
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Hi - this all sounds exactly like OCD. There are several great resources for dealing with OCD as a Christian and I'd like to share them here. (This is my first post - if I break any rules by doing this, please let me know.) Mark DeJesus (MarkDeJesus.com), Jaimie Eckert (scrupulosity.com), and Dr Ian Osborn (OCDandChristianity.com) are the best resources in my opinion. Dr Osborn is a Christian, OCD sufferer and Christian. Also, I recently published a book called "Waging War Against OCD - A Christian Approach to Victory." You can see more details at WagingWarAgainstOCD.com
Appreciate the resources
 
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OCD can be so tough to deal with! I have had scrupulosity most of my life, and have dealt with quite a few different themes. I am happy to share some of the resources that have helped me, if you would like!
I am open to resources and would appreciate it
 
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