Not a parent, but need some advice on a toddler

[congregant]

Hi, I hope it's okay that I'm posting here. My housemates have a two-year-old son who is sometimes sweet but often troublesome.

Specifically, one of the things he does is block my passage through a doorway when he sees me coming. He sticks his arms out wide on the frame. Often I just pick him up and move him, but if I nudge past him (like if my hands are full), he cries. At other times, he also slaps/kicks me. His parents are lax disciplinarians, so I get little help from them.

How can I get him to stop blocking me going through a doorway? I guess he thinks it's a game but it really annoys me. Also, I'm not the only one in the house he does it to (but I'm the one he does it to the most).

Thanks for any advice. God bless you.

 

[SiyoNqoba]

Honestly, he's 2. He's playing a little game, and thinks you're having fun playing his little game with him. My advice would be to relax, plant a huge grin on your face, and deal with the 30 seconds it takes to make this little boy feel delighted in.

If you can't pick him up and move him out of the way because your hands are full, say "Oh, sorry buddy, I need to get past! Can you please move out of the way for me?" and then "Good boy! Thank you!" rather than just nudging past him.

 

[JCFantasy23]

It sounds like something he thinks would be fun and when you lift him adn ruin the game, he cries. I know this can be annoying to you but he should eventually lose interest in the game.

 

[akmom]

My kids always do this. They see me coming, and so they stand in front of me and stop. It kind of forces me to pay attention to them. It annoys me too, and I've been in the habit on waiting for them to finish saying whatever they have to say, so I guess I've been reinforcing the behavior by making it effective. So lately, I have been ordering them to move when they do this, and not letting them get a word in until they do. I really want to break the habit.

If your hands are full, perhaps you can give the little boy something to put away. If you have groceries, hand him something small and ask him to take it to the kitchen, or "Give it to your mommy." If you can't, then ask him to show you how fast he can run. Or how high he can jump. Or anything that requires him to move, but promises him the attention he wants, so he isn't left there crying. Be sure to acknowledge whatever he does. ("Wow, you're fast.")

 

[CRAZY_CAT_WOMAN]

C likes to block me, he's 4 years old. Usually he ask for 8,80 million 88houndred thousand and what ever. I pretend to pay him and he lets me go. Sometimes he blocks me from both sides and I make a game out of it. So I just play along.

 

[GloryBeeMe]

My kids always do this. They see me coming, and so they stand in front of me and stop. It kind of forces me to pay attention to them. It annoys me too, and I've been in the habit on waiting for them to finish saying whatever they have to say, so I guess I've been reinforcing the behavior by making it effective. So lately, I have been ordering them to move when they do this, and not letting them get a word in until they do. I really want to break the habit.

If your hands are full, perhaps you can give the little boy something to put away. If you have groceries, hand him something small and ask him to take it to the kitchen, or "Give it to your mommy." If you can't, then ask him to show you how fast he can run. Or how high he can jump. Or anything that requires him to move, but promises him the attention he wants, so he isn't left there crying. Be sure to acknowledge whatever he does. ("Wow, you're fast.")

Well said. 2 year olds deal well with redirection.

 

[tansy]

All the previous suggestions are good ones.
Sometimes when one of my kids maybe wouldn't move or whatever, I would just stand and wait, and eventually they would get bored and move of their own accord..depends really on their age and WHY they're blocking your way..whether it's for attention or a game or other reason.

 

[HIS Geeky Girl]

You guys are a lot more accomodating than I would be lol. I was raised that you obey an order given to you by an adult, or there are consequences. I would ask him very nicely, "Please move out of the way, buddy", and that's all he would get. If he didn't listen, I'd pick him up and move him, or as the OP said, gently nudge past him. If he cries, so what? Kids cry when they don't get their way, that doesn't mean you walk on eggshells or cater to their tantrums. They need to learn the world doesn't revolve around them, and bad behavior doesn't get rewarded. A crying kid isn't going to shrivel up and die. It's not a crime to upset a disobedient 2 year old's feelings. I'd make sure to give him plenty of praise and positive attention at other times, not just walk around like a mean old tyrant; but when he's disobedient to a direct request, he'd get gentle, firm, consistent consequences from me. From what the OP states, that may be the only hint of real "parenting" the kid ever gets.