New christian, having guilt

[Littlek]

Hello,
I have been visiting this site for quite a while and decided to join. I am a new christian, almost 2 years, and I am having trouble with a couple of things. First of all I have always, (since I was little) believed in God. I read the bible to my children and tried to teach them the best that I knew. I didn't go to church and didn't totally change my life until a few years ago when I hit the bottom. I think that was my true turning point. Anyway, I have a christian sister whom I go to church with and she tried to help me with questions as much as possible. I know I am saved, I have asked to be saved and accepted Jesus as my savior and I have repented and turned away from sin that I was in before. (I know we still sin) Now I am stuck in this critical thinking that bothers me alot. At times I don't feel good enough, and I know we are not good enough and we will never be, but I judge everything I do! I am trying to please God and I am so scared to make the wrong choice. It is a awful pattern to be in and I hate it. I know we can not earn our way to heaven, why am I constantly worrying about what I am doing right or what am I doing that may be wrong. I want to relax and enjoy God, I want to stop thinking oh if I don't go next door and check on my neighbor I am bad, or if someone cuts me off in traffic and it makes me upset, Im bad, or if I decide to go shopping and spend time with hubby all day, Im selfish. Ahhh. lol. Do you see what I am saying? Is this satan trying to trick me? I know to much guilt is from him. I think this is the worst part for me. I feel like I am in a trap...ah, maybe I am. I will probably have more questions...lol, I don't have any close christian friends who can help me with some issues.

Thanks for all of your help and advise.

Karen

 

[pilgrimgal]

You sound like you have an overly scrupulous conscience ..and because of that you are feeling guilty over normal things you do. Yet you seem to know that God does not want us to live a guilt-ridden life.

I have had this happen many times in my Christian walk. Here is what helps me. Everytime you feel guilty and stressed out about "not doing enough" start "Praising God and thanking Him for all He has done." Do that over and over again or simply just sing, say, or read scriptures which praise God. The Psalms are full of them! God does dwell in our praises and so the more you praise the more joy you will sense and be able to give these thoughts over to Him; and not get all strung out on things you think you should be doing. Of course, that doesn't mean you should do nothing at all..but you'll know, you'll have peace, when the time is right for certain actions and services. Ask God for and then trust God to give you the grace to sort out the difference..the gift of discerning.

You probably are a giving and generous person who wants to serve; and God will call you to do things when you are ready. He often uses the encouragement and invitation of others to do just that. And sometimes He wants us to spend a lot of time just learning more from His Word.

This scripture helps me to get my thoughts straight especially when I get stressed out and overly guilty thinking I didn't do enough or "must do." In the words of Jesus:


“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30) (NIV)

The joy of the Lord is your strength. Rejoice and enjoy the goodness of the Lord!

peace..

 

[SharonL]

You need to see yourself as God sees you - white as snow, washed in the Blood of Jesus. When you repent of sins that have already been repented for - God says 'what sins' - they are in the lake of forgetfulness - God remembers them no more. Just fall in the open arms of Jesus. The Bible tells us we can go boldly to the throne. You are worthy.

 

[paul1149]

Hi Karen,

I can relate to your dilemma, because I too had a scrupulous conscience. At the root of scrupulosity is the presupposition that we are supposed to perform perfectly. The cure is to understand that this contradicts the Biblical truth that man is hopelessly broken and simply cannot perform perfectly. That is why it was necessary for Jesus to come and pay our ransom; otherwise He would not have had to die.

In my case, in the Lord's mercy He allowed my spiritual life to grind to an absolute halt. I saw myself dangling by a single thread over an abyss, rendered utterly incapable of saving myself. Yet the thread held. I slowly began to realize that this was the amazing keeping power of Jesus, quite separate from any works I could ever possibly do. He has used that horrendous time of my life to bless not only me, but others as well.

This is why Paul reminds us:

For we are the circumcision, who worship by the Spirit of God and glory in Christ Jesus and put no confidence in the flesh -php 3.1-3).​

It's impossible to worship in the Spirit and glory in Christ Jesus when we are preoccupied with our own performance. This is why Father wants us to turn our focus away from ourselves. Whether we are patting ourselves on the back or scourging ourselves with chains, it's all the same distraction from bathing in His healing, empowering acceptance, love and grace.

The solution to scrupulosity is to really understand Jesus' statement, "without Me you can do nothing". Reckon the flesh as dead, and begin to glory in Christ Jesus and all He's done for you (see php 4.4-9). When you conscience castigates you, don't bother fighting it on its own distractive level, just turn your focus on the completed works of Christ with respect to you. Your mind can only focus on one thing at a time, so the carnal thoughts will have to take a back seat. And if you keep at it, they'll feel so rejected they'll get off the bus entirely at some point. It's a process that may take time, but if you persist you will have the victory and you will be free.

Grace and peace,
p.

 

[Littlek]

Pilgrimgal,
Yes you are right, an overly scrupulous conscience. I pay attention to every little thing I do. So when he is ready, he will use me? I have had chances to come up at work to witness and it felt like the right time because I like to talk to people and get to know them before I can witness. I just can't come out and say it. So I had the opportunity to witness to quite a few people who I spent time with at work. I don't like to rush or throw it in people's faces. I wait and listen and when the moment is right I speak. BUT, maybe me being overly worried about doing right and wrong, maybe he is waiting for me at the right time to use me. I praise and thank him all the time. I thank him so much he probably says, ok, karen, I got it..lol. Thank you I will certainly praise him and stop getting strung out on right and wrong.
Thank you Sharon and Paul, very good advise, and I will take it to heart.
I guess I just wanna be good and do the right thing "all" of the time.

Peace to you all,
Karen

 

[pilgrimgal]

Pilgrimgal,
Yes you are right, an overly scrupulous conscience. I pay attention to every little thing I do. So when he is ready, he will use me? I have had chances to come up at work to witness and it felt like the right time because I like to talk to people and get to know them before I can witness. I just can't come out and say it. So I had the opportunity to witness to quite a few people who I spent time with at work. I don't like to rush or throw it in people's faces. I wait and listen and when the moment is right I speak. BUT, maybe me being overly worried about doing right and wrong, maybe he is waiting for me at the right time to use me. I praise and thank him all the time. I thank him so much he probably says, ok, karen, I got it..lol. Thank you I will certainly praise him and stop getting strung out on right and wrong.
Thank you Sharon and Paul, very good advise, and I will take it to heart.
I guess I just wanna be good and do the right thing "all" of the time.

Peace to you all,
Karen

I think your heart is in the right place. And I think you are wise to let the Lord open the way for what you say to people like at work. Sometimes the very best thing we can do is simply to be friendly and be a friend..and then when the right moment comes to share your faith the Lord will help you know what to say; and it will be good. God bless..

 

[heron]

So when he is ready, he will use me? I have had chances to come up at work to witness and it felt like the right time because I like to talk to people and get to know them before I can witness. I just can't come out and say it. So I had the opportunity to witness to quite a few people who I spent time with at work. I don't like to rush or throw it in people's faces. I wait and listen and when the moment is right I speak. BUT, maybe me being overly worried about doing right and wrong, maybe he is waiting for me at the right time to use me.

Build your faith naturally into your conversations. Resist us:them thinking, and picture each one of these people on a gradual discipleship path. Care for them as people, and you will find yourself slipping out with enough information about yourself that they will know who to come to with questions.

 

[LaShae]

I think we have moments like this. We are human and that is why God made a way for our sins to be forgiven. Don't be so critical of yourself. God loves you. Be patient with yourself and just talk to the Lord and ask for strength on days that you feel this way. Many blessings sent your way. Hope things get easier for you. Have a wonderful day

 

[kimmyh51]

Maybe you are under demonic interferance? Have you tried rebuking in jesus name when those thoughts start coming into your head? Also try leaving your radio on at home on a christian station (just down super low so you can hardly hear it - apparently demons have very good ears and hate music praising god) and leave it on 24/7 - I did that and was surprised at how much of the negative feelings a bit like what you are going through lifted, Im pretty sure it was the enemy stirring a bit of the brown stuff...

 

[Alex1234567890]

=)