New Christian abused at home

[rookiechristian]

I am a new christian but my husband he is an atheist. We both used to be atheist until I found Jesus Christ. Now he is abusive and makes fun of me all day and he won't let me go to church. I want to leave him but I have relied on him my entire adult life. I have two little kids, no money and no immediate family. I just want to be free of him. I pray secretly all the time but I am losing hope.

 

[tturt]

praying for you

 

[MyEverything]

I'm really sorry to hear that. Are you in a position to start trying to be more independent? I mean, is there anyway that you could get a job (even if it's part time) and start saving up money for yourself and your kids? I'll be praying for you.

 

[Deleteriousnonsense]

I would pray not that you be free from your husband but that he might also come to know Christ by your example. Your faith is being tested as the Lord will suffer no lies. Rejoice and be exceedingly glad when others persecute you for His name's sake, and if you cannot find a way to your prayer meeting pray all the more fervently alone. As strong as your husband is, and he may be stronger than you, he is nothing compared to Christ.

 

[Bouke285]

The bible says women are so supposed to be silent and obedient to their husbands, go find a new faith or start being obedient

Of course you would find a way to twist our faith in order to make one of your lustily sought points. The bible first and foremost commands the man to love, and respect his wife. How can a woman submit to what does not love or allow her to?

I too am praying for you, I suggest you confront him once and for all, tell him I choose God, if you will not join me in his love, then I no longer want anything to do with you. I know I don't fully understand the situation, but I think it will be easier for you to make the choice of leaving, or staying after you force him to face the more important choice for himself.

 

[fm107]

Hi Sister,

The bible address your very circumstance:

1 Corinthians 7:12-16
To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.
But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?

Be happy when people persecute you because you will be greatly blessed:

Luke 6:22
Blessed are you when men hate you, when they exclude you and insult you and reject your name as evil, because of the Son of Man. "Rejoice in that day and leap for joy, because great is your reward in heaven. For that is how their fathers treated the prophets.

Instead of praying to God that you can escape your husband, pray for him instead of yourself. Pray that he might also come to believe in God:

Matthew 5:44
But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you

God is using you as a testimony, perhaps you can come to make your husband believe when he sees how kind and considerate you are. How you continue to do good to him despite him being bad to you:

Matthew 5:16
In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.

We should expect persecution in life just like our Lord Jesus was persecuted:

John 15:20
Remember the words I spoke to you: 'No servant is greater than his master.' If they persecuted me, they will persecute you also. If they obeyed my teaching, they will obey yours also.


May God bless you my sister, keep praying to God and ask for strength but pray for your husband too.

 

[heron]

Very frustrating -- I hope you can find some solutions. Pray that God will place you where He wants you, and bring ideas to mind.

Some mothers find that watching additional children gives them some income without making the husband feel threatened about their wives being out in the world. I have also known people who found nanny jobs that allowed them to bring their kids.

If you stay in exactly the same spot, you will feel more and more buried over time, and less capable of getting out of the situation.

Most towns have women's shelters, some of which hide information from anyone.

National Coalition Against Domestic Violence

National Coalition Against Domestic Violence

Domestic Violence and Abuse: Signs of Abuse and Abusive Relationships

You might not feel like the situation is bad enough to leave right now, but since your spouse has changed lately, his condition might worsen. Set up a plan in your mind, and start talking with people about places you can bring the kids in an emergency.

Your local school might even have some resources in the office.

 

[Mrs. Luther073082]

I would echo the advise of the poster above me and check out the links to the shelters.

 

[Sketcher]

This honestly reminds me of Lee Strobel's testimony. He was a jerkish atheist, and when he found out his wife had converted to Christianity, he was upset to say the least. He did not want a Christian wife at all - he thought she would turn into a prude who would be so busy with church stuff that she'd have no time for him. What he got instead was a wife with better character, and he appreciated it. She did eventually get him to church, and that did open his mind to investigating Christianity. He eventually converted, and when the oldest daughter saw that he wasn't punching doors anymore, she wanted to become a Christian too.

Scripture is clear that we are not to divorce our spouses, or purposely push our spouses into divorcing us (1 Corinthians 7:10-15). However, there's nothing in Scripture that says you or the kids must stay under the same roof if he's putting any of you in physical danger. If it ever gets to that point, then you may need to find a Christian women's shelter in your area for help. If it has not yet gotten to that point, then you need to stay, pray, and show him that his negative prejudices against Christians are wrong. And definitely read your Bible, and get to church. Do not lie, to not commit any other sin - one, it's not who we are anymore (Colossians 3:10, 1 Corinthians 6:11), and two, he'll doubly use that against you.

 

[singpeace]

I am a new christian but my husband he is an atheist. We both used to be atheist until I found Jesus Christ. Now he is abusive and makes fun of me all day and he won't let me go to church. I want to leave him but I have relied on him my entire adult life. I have two little kids, no money and no immediate family. I just want to be free of him. I pray secretly all the time but I am losing hope.

Father, I thank you for your mercy and know that it is forever. I thank you for your willingness to become personally involved in our lives - as a loving Father and a Friend. Father God, there is great need for this lady who as accepted your Son Jesus as her Savior. You see the whole situation clear and I have faith that your Spirit is upon her in that home - and working out Your good will in her husband. Break the husband's heart, Lord and bring him to repentance. Keep the wife strong and help her to have a quiet spirit of meekness, gentleness and love. In Jesus name, I pray. Amen.

 

[heron]

Most shelters will not give any information if a partner comes looking. They know this is common, and that partners get destructive in a rage.

Shelters can also refer you to other resources with long-term solutions.
Catholic family services is very organized and ready to help people in transitions.
Governmental Family Services can help you start a new life with training and job connections.
Churches might have families willing to house a family for a week or a few days.

It is definitely worth believing that there are people out there willing to help you. Lean on them, and some easier year, you can return the favor.

 

[insurchoftruth]

I will pray for you!

Blessings!


Isaiah 25:8, 30:19, 40:1, 41:10,13,14, 2 Corinthians 1:3-11, 4:16-18, 7:6, 12:9,10, Psalm 116:3-9, Psalm 30:11, Psalm 94:17-19, Psalm 34, Psalm 147:3, Psalm 22:24, Psalm 55:22, 1 Corinthians 10:13, 2, Luke 4:18,19, Jeremiah 29:11, 31:13, Thessalonians 2:16,17, Psalm 28:7, Psalm 25:16,17,18, Matthew 5:4,11, 22:29, Mark 6:5, 6, 9:17–24, Matthew 7:24-27, 11:28-30, Psalm 46:1, John 16:33, Romans 8:18,26,28,31-39, Romans 5:4, 15:5,13, 2 Corinthians 6:4-10, Isaiah 61:1-4, Psalm 50:15, 3 John 2, Psalm 71:21, Hebrews 12:5-11, Mark 4:6, 17, Revelation 3:19, 21:3,4, Psalm 33:19, Numbers 11:1, Psalm 145:14

 

[salida]

I will pray for you. He sounds very self centered not letting you go to church and just wants to control you. Is there a friend you can stay with? You do not have to put up with mental abuse all the time. Maybe show him this if he is ever willing:

Visit: www.TheBibleProofBook.com, (you will need acrobat reader for this), read The Evidence That Demands A Verdict by Josh McDowell a former agnostic- (its overwhelming circumstantial evidence of bible) and Examine the Evidence by Muncaster a former athiest/The Case for Christ and The Real Jesus by Lee Strobel a former athiest. www.equip.org (articles), http://www.gotquestions.org/,
http://christiananswers.net/

http://www.reasonableanswers.org/12-Eyewitnesses-of-the-resurrection.html


(For an athiest)
Visit the website Reasonable Faith-Bill Craig is a great debater and started this site, in fact Richard Dawkins the famous athiest is afraid to debate him. You have to register but its worth it if your interested.