new Baptist with idenity and faith isuses

[Tyler52]

Over the last few years i have been fighting idenity issues and problems that i thought was mental health issues but really its demons inside me controling me telling me am going to hell
for a very long time i have been jumping from one false faiths to another but most of the time i want to find peace , i was born catholic but due to trauma i cant remember much of that time where i was a child due to the trauma i didnt really know much of the bible apart from the childrens bible stories i know that Jesus is God and the holy spirit
through out my childhood was subjected to abuse all kinds of abuse when i was 16 i became homeless and i lost faith i became a witch or thats what i labeled myself as but i didnt really do much with it until i met my husband he at the time he had no faith then i jumped faith and became muslim , my dad died ( my dad had nothing to do with the trauma and abuse as he worked nights ) from then i jumped from one false faith to another over and over then i went back to being christian but to an lgbt church where my idenity issues got worse i thought i was a transgender man ( am born female ) went to pride etc but i was still faith jumping then i came across a church that plays praise and worship music and my husband through the other church is christian but will not come to the new church my husband is at the old church
LGBT friends etc I have tried over and over for him to come to the new church but he says no so i cant make him go there

because of everything that happened to me as an adult and child i hear voices and see things i thought it was mental health issues but i dont think it is now av had the mental health issues for years now and nothing helps get rid of the thoughts voices and demons in my head
i take medication av tried to stop taking it but every time i have my husband fights with me about it and get stressed out over it

i want to be bapised as i havent yet got it done as a adult who can choose to became Christian and i have started to read the Bible and learn more about jesus i have asked my husband if i could get bapised but he told me to wait a year before getting it done as he wants me to be going to the new church for a while as he feels this is a phase am going through
i want to get it done sooner but i guess i have to wait a year
my husband dont believe in demons etc but i really think there is something demonic going on with me he believes the drs who want to load me with meds and i dont know if they are damaging me or what

today is thursday and i love getting to the weekend so i can go to church on a Sunday and sing and praise Jesus
am unsure what to do about the voices thoughts and seeing things unsure if it just illness or something else

Jesus and the holy Spirit are different people, as well as Jesus and the Father, you know that right? (I'm not trying to be rude, just making sure you know that and seeing if the sentence wasn't worded poorly by mistake.)

God bless you Lily and I hope you overcome everything (voices and all of your sins)

 

[Tyler52]

Over the last few years i have been fighting idenity issues and problems that i thought was mental health issues but really its demons inside me controling me telling me am going to hell
for a very long time i have been jumping from one false faiths to another but most of the time i want to find peace , i was born catholic but due to trauma i cant remember much of that time where i was a child due to the trauma i didnt really know much of the bible apart from the childrens bible stories i know that Jesus is God and the holy spirit
through out my childhood was subjected to abuse all kinds of abuse when i was 16 i became homeless and i lost faith i became a witch or thats what i labeled myself as but i didnt really do much with it until i met my husband he at the time he had no faith then i jumped faith and became muslim , my dad died ( my dad had nothing to do with the trauma and abuse as he worked nights ) from then i jumped from one false faith to another over and over then i went back to being christian but to an lgbt church where my idenity issues got worse i thought i was a transgender man ( am born female ) went to pride etc but i was still faith jumping then i came across a church that plays praise and worship music and my husband through the other church is christian but will not come to the new church my husband is at the old church
LGBT friends etc I have tried over and over for him to come to the new church but he says no so i cant make him go there

because of everything that happened to me as an adult and child i hear voices and see things i thought it was mental health issues but i dont think it is now av had the mental health issues for years now and nothing helps get rid of the thoughts voices and demons in my head
i take medication av tried to stop taking it but every time i have my husband fights with me about it and get stressed out over it

i want to be bapised as i havent yet got it done as a adult who can choose to became Christian and i have started to read the Bible and learn more about jesus i have asked my husband if i could get bapised but he told me to wait a year before getting it done as he wants me to be going to the new church for a while as he feels this is a phase am going through
i want to get it done sooner but i guess i have to wait a year
my husband dont believe in demons etc but i really think there is something demonic going on with me he believes the drs who want to load me with meds and i dont know if they are damaging me or what

today is thursday and i love getting to the weekend so i can go to church on a Sunday and sing and praise Jesus
am unsure what to do about the voices thoughts and seeing things unsure if it just illness or something else

Also, remember don't follow denominations follow Jesus and repent of (stop) all sins. Remember, the mouth of the pastor is not the mouth of God, he may say true things, but he isn't necessarily speaking for God, nor the word of God. Also if you have time check out warningthepeople and the insurgence podcast, which are both on youtube

 

[Lily76_]

i dont really understand about Jesus and the holy spirit i know there is the trinity but thats all i know av not read the bible very much and its only been in the last few months av been allowed to by my husband he was worried that me reading the bible will push me away from my friends who are LGBT i love LGBT friends but i know its wrong for them to do what they do i thought at one point i was LGBT but am not i just have identity issues due to abuse and my mental health i know i am female Not male i know that man and women marry not two women or two men
i am at this new church and i have been reading the part of the bible that is about the service on the mount
going slowly through that as i need to read it over and over for me to understand it am a slow learner
i was born christian yet i dont know very much

 

[Lily76_]

i dont get the basics like the holy spirit and Jesus ... i feel like am a failure

 

[Dropout_Theologian]

i dont get the basics like the holy spirit and Jesus ... i feel like am a failure

Hey, Lily, you're doing your best. Keep reading your Bible, going to church, keep going to AA and you'll soon have all the answers down pat. Praying for you and your husband.

 

[JohnTh]

i dont get the basics like the holy spirit and Jesus ... i feel like am a failure

Take it easy. In fact, to be sincere, nobody understands. It needs time. A lot of time and prayer. But you will see that God will enlighten you.

Here is a hint:
Let's say that there are three SUPER-spirits like three SUPER-souls - something like this. Resembling our souls but much, much „better” - above all. This is God.

Because we are sinners, these Super-Spirits decided to send one of them to became man like us in order to save us from sin. This man which is also God is Jesus Christ.

At one moment Jesus Christ said „Ok, I must go now but I will send another Super-Spirit to comfort you”. This is the Holy Spirit which comes in the hearts of the ones which call Him.

You can call Him in your heart and you will see that He will lead you to victory.

Victory isn't a „magical boom” but rather a pure dawn which grows and grows and grows peacefully.

Here something like this - the link is a tune take care to listen it carefully and with patience.

Nobody is a failure. Listen to the link and while listen read here to understand (there are photos with nice clothes and stuff, oh my! - but do not forget to listen and read the text)

 

[Tyler52]

i dont get the basics like the holy spirit and Jesus ... i feel like am a failure

You're not a failure Lily, you're doing your best and God knows that. Most people don't understand the trinity, because God is such a more complex being than us. It's ok that you don't understand everything, I don't believe that anyone truely does.