Please forgive me if this sounds severe, but I think there's a fair amount of whinging going on here.
What's all this twaddle about "I'm over 30 ; I'm still single ; I've never been in a relationship ; woe is me" ?
Where is it written that you must be married in your 20s ? Does that somehow make your life better, or your love any richer ? Personally I believe that anyone who marries before 30 is not yet fully ripened into an adult. Personally I believe that the ideal age for marriage is somewhere between 30 and 50.
I'm over 30 and I'm still single. And there are a lot of valid reasons to be over 30 and still single. Six years ago I was engaged to a wonderful man. (He's still wonderful, just married to someone else.) But I couldn't see myself entering into marriage without a university degree -- in my family higher education is highly valued and I wanted to find my vocation (Middle English vocacioun,
divine call to a religious life, from Old French vocation, from Latin voc
ti
, voc
ti
n-,
a calling). So I moved 1800 miles away to live with my family and get a double BA and my fiancé couldn't stand the separation so he broke up with me. I spent six years focused on getting my degrees and didn't date at all during that time. I have been very happy during this time.
I don't feel "set in my ways" or elderly, possibly because I've been responding to challenges and growing for the past six years.
I don't feel that dating is hard. Maybe it's because I have an articulate, active, intelligent nature and like attracts like. Not every date I've had has led to anything further, some of my romances haven't been very serious, and nobody has proposed marriage to me yet, but I intend to keep at it. Dating is good for my social skills (which are a little rusty after six years as a cloistered student), it's teaching me how to relate to me (again), and I enjoy it.
Buying a house, now -- that's another matter. To me a house represents the security other people seek in a mate. I've seen the house I really want and it's beyond my reach. Right now I'm a part-time student with a limited income, and who knows whether I'll ever qualify for
any home loan ? It's very difficult, especially without a down payment. So I may be living with my parents for a very long time, especially in this economy. And believe me I'd much rather have a house than a husband. The spouse can always come later.
FS