I have a constant struggle with negative self thoughts I think to myself. I let this hinder me in my career, confidence, communication with family, etc and am wondering if any spiritual guidance or practical tips to help me. I feel this is a constant war going on in my head and I’m at a point in my life I’ve had enough. Sometimes I battle my own thoughts with reminding myself that I have no reason to think these thanks to Jesus and I am more than what I think about of these negative thoughts but that only helps for a period of time.
This is a struggle many have to some extent. It seems like a battle we have to fight over and over again - and to some extent we do, it may seem like some don't have this struggle but they must be the exception.
There seems to be a little critic inside at times, and there is - this 'inner prattler' has been discussed down through the centuries - When I sometimes set out to attempt something I feel worthwhile - up it pops - or sometimes its literally seems like my own self-talk, or it hijacks my self-talk. I think the best thing is to ignore it as much as possible (and re-direct ones mind to some scriptural promise). But that is not easy because this critical voice seems to stem from the more emotional side of our brain.
Look up some of the scriptures that are about how we are to think of ourselves - eg. "...think of yourself with sober judgement according to the faith God has given you." (Romans 12:3)
Sober judgement means a true appraisal of ourselves in the light of the faith God has given us. Its part of the renewal of the mind that Paul is talking about in Romans 12.
Romano Guardini has written:
"The act of self-acceptance is the root of all things. I must agree to be the person who I am. Agree to have the qualifications which I have. Agree to live within the limitations set for me...The clarity and the courageousness of this acceptance is the foundation of all existence." (The Virtues)
The inner critic is usually vague and bullying and talks nonsense, those who write on the topic understand it to stem from the more emotional side rather than the rational side of the mind or soul.
Sometimes fear may behind our self-talk.
Another factor I think behind negative self-talk, is the self-esteem movement and some of their teachings - some of these teaching may be counter-productive - a book I mention at the end of my post has some common sense discussion about that. It may seem odd to mention self-esteem teachings, but I actually believe that at least as regards myself the Lord put his finger on some of this for me years ago and identified some of the non christian self-esteem books (ironically one given to me by a christian) as the problem.
I think in my own case I can feel a bit inferior sometimes around others who seem to have it all together. And those are times I become more of an inner critical voice.
But I get what you are saying - this inner critic has hijacked me sometimes.
If you need to work through any self-acceptance issues then you might benefit from seeking out healing prayer.
I recommend Leanne Payne's book : Restoring the Christian Soul - it has a lot of scriptural teaching on self-acceptance.
A secular self-help book called Self-Acceptance by Harry Barry also might be worth taking a look at, it discusses the self-esteem movement and the 'dark side' of self-esteem. It doesn't root the solution in Jesus Christ, but it does have some discussion of the subject of negative self-talk.
Hope something there may be of help to you.
God Bless.
