Need Support

[wblastyn]

Hello everyone, I'm not sure if this is the right place or not but here goes:

I'm currently in my 2nd year at university in my Biomedical Science degree. I was diagnosed with AS in November and am still adjusting to the news. I've a lot to talk about and find it difficult to organise things properly, so bear with me if you can.

I've been through a bit of an experience these past few weeks. I was taking severe panic attacks, vomiting and going into hysterics because of my impending exams. I was in such a state that I eventually took an overdose of propanolol (beta blockers), and was rushed into hospital where I stayed overnight. I have suffered from depression and anxiety in the past but have never attempted suicide until now. Everyone kept telling me that I'm smart and would pass my exams with flying colours, etc but I just felt out of control and wanted it all to stop, so I took the pills.

I have been able to postpone my exams until August, which was a bit of a relief but I'm worried it will all happen again. I'd rather not try to kill myself again but I want to get my degree.

I'm not sure why the exams caused me such distress. I was fine during my 1st semester exams in 1st year and I was worried during my 2nd semester exams but not like I was this time. I'm also pretty intelligent, I won a scholarship for being in the top 3 in my class.

My parents and therapist have suggested it could have been because I just found out I had AS, which was a relief at first but then turned into a huge shock when I released "I really am different!". My dog also died recently, which was a huge loss (I know it might sound silly but I was devastated when he died). The work load in university has also increased a lot this year, and I was finding it difficult to juggle everything (due to the AS), so I was pretty stressed out all semester. Everything "bubbled" up to the surface due to the pressure of the exams and exploded.

I have informed the Disability Services at the university about my AS. They are going to provide me with support, which should hopefully help when I have to do my exams again.

At the minute my sleep pattern is out of whack, which is why I'm posting this at 3.30am. I've been sitting up on my computer (my special interest) for hours. I'm a little worried that I'm going to sink into depression, because this is what happened the last time I was depressed - I slept all day and woke at night.

Sorry for the length, but i just felt like I wanted to tell someone. has anyone else with AS experienced anything like this? Did everything work out ok for you?

 

[vespasia]

I am in the UK.

I have to deal with UK services education and so on.

I will get back to you this evening as I have a fully booked working day.

 

[Flynmonkie]

Hi!
I am not a doctor, nor do I have allot of experience with Aspergers

Actually, right now my 3-year old is going through some things, he is strong willed and some of his behavior "might" be construed as Autistic (possibly Aspergers). Obsessed with trains! Right now it is too early to tell. He does not speak, just diagnosed recently with Speech and Language Disability. But also, he looses it (really frustrated in stressful situations).

Something that is very common with Aspergers has to do with sensory. For my child he actually becomes calm by pressure touch. For instance, they have recommended to me that I should allow him to get between my box springs and mattress, allowing the mattress to lay on him for a bit. This really works. For some reason it calms him down. I have only done slight reading on this, but Prof. Dr. Temple Grandin, PhD, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Temple_Grandin whom also has high functioning Aspergers, built a box to "relax" in that actually causes pressure. It is called a hug machine (or squeeze machine) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hug_machine there are links to her page through wiki.

Before we were told this about my son, I noticed he would crawl behind me while sitting on the couch and want me to lean onto him a bit. His whole demeanor would change. He would actually laugh like it tickled. It might be worth a try, if anything you can feel silly enough to laugh yourself out of the stress! To be honest, I wondered in reading about this if being submerged in a warm bath would work. Also, heavy down comforters. If it is in the summer, air conditioning and a fan. This is something I do that calms me, and never realized it could be a sensory thing! I have never been diagnosed with this. But it makes sense.

Anyway, I just thought of this when I read about your stress level. College is stressful. Believe it or not, you are not alone -- many gifted also have this. Some do not even know it. (Hey did you know they think Einstein had it too? Some say Aspergers and giftedness run hand in hand! http://www.twicegifted.net/asperger.htm )

Also, of course you don't want to be in depression for too long, but I believe that depression is sometimes good. Your depression sounds like a natural grieving process. Think about what depression felt like before. You reach a low, only to gain a better high. Of course you should never reach so low. But I think it is a natural mechanism that helps us to cope. IMHO. But of course, as it seems you are aware, it is not good to dwell on things too long. There is a time where it becomes a problem.

Try not to look at your situation with despair! Think of all the things with your intellect you could contribute to helping others, knowing first hand how they feel!

Here is an excellent site on aspergers and sensory:
http://www.theaspergersconnection.org/courses/esimplications/additional_characteristics.html

Hope this helps!

 

[vespasia]

Hallo wblastyn

Congratulations on being given the place at university to study biomedical science. That is an achievement in of itself!

Being told that you have something and it has a name can be hard to take in. Amongst the more able end there are those who choose to go for a formal diagnosis and those who are simply happy to know that is why some things are harder for them to do and understand but do not want to be officially diagnosed.

Severe panic attacks are not fun. It is not something I have but I work with ASD teens who have horrendous panic attacks that make them scared to do thing in case they have an attack.
Often the fear of an attack can set off and attack and that can make a person feel too scared to do things they want to.
It sounds from what you have written as if you suffered an acute period of anxiety I am glad that you did not permantly harm yourself whilst you were feeling so overwhelmed and trapped.

Being smart is not the same as having the confidence to sit exams. With ASD not knowing what to expect in an exam room, issues to do with sensory perception or not being able to freely move around can seem overwhelming and its the simple silly things that can make an aspie run away from sitting exams that could be the problem rather than the exam itself.

This is the support directory network website for University Students with ASD http://www.users.dircon.co.uk/~cns/ You are not the only University Student who has had or has ASD. With the diagnosis you can claim Disabled Student Allowances which can help.

Most high functioning aspies I know have lousy sleeping patterns, they simply find it hard to stop processing information and sleep. If this becomes a worry talk with the doctor who diagnosed you.

I am in the 'upper end' and aspie. I choose NOT to go for the full formal diagnosis because for me being aspie gives me more benefits that deficits in higher education. Most of my difficulties came from the inflexibility of school and pupils who could not get where I was coming from. I think I may have scared my teachers half to death with my 'enquiring mind' .

Some with Aspersers have not chosen to have the 'label' until they were over 80. If having the label gives you more benefits than problems then it is worth having the label. It is a spectrum. Some people have more difficulties than others. If your not happy about being made 'official telephone the team who made the diagnosis and ask if you can come back and talk with them some more about the diagnosis. Some Aspies find that simply knowing why they are different allows them to adapt how they live to play to their strengths and work around their weaknesses. this can take time so for now allow yourself some time to get used to knowing there is a reason why everyone else seems to do things that you find odd.

If your feeling very stressed or unhappy or worried even if you cannot show it on the outside talk to someone.


If any of this is unclear let me know and I will try to explain more clearly.
(Sorry I have just come back from a very busy day at work and I KNOW I will be researching tonight.
I like to prove that aspies can go to university, get a job and get married if they choose to

 

[vespasia]

Flymonkie.

Temple Grandin is HYPO tactile, she needs to have constant tactile sensory feedback.
If a person is HYPER tactile attempting to make physical contact is a bad idea. It causes them real physical pain to be even lightly touched.

Most aspergers are not 'gifted' that is a myth. Most are simply ordinary kids who try to struggle through english and heave a sigh of relief when it comes to maths. (patterns and logic that produce right or wrong answers)

Depression and aspergers is NOT good because of the difficulties in communicating how it makes a person feel. The suffering it can cause an individual with asd is immense and many do attempt suicide. Sadly it is often not until a person with asd has attempted sucide that anyone realises just how much suffering they have endured often for months and years.
I write as one who gets to see some of the poor souls trying to pick up the pieces and fit into the community in the aftermath. Makes me feel like shaking society for making such peoples lifes so difficult over so many little petty things and marginalising them so much that this has been the result.

(Something I have strong opnions about.)

 

[Flynmonkie]

Flymonkie.

Temple Grandin is HYPO tactile, she needs to have constant tactile sensory feedback.
If a person is HYPER tactile attempting to make physical contact is a bad idea. It causes them real physical pain to be even lightly touched.

Most aspergers are not 'gifted' that is a myth. Most are simply ordinary kids who try to struggle through english and heave a sigh of relief when it comes to maths. (patterns and logic that produce right or wrong answers)

Depression and aspergers is NOT good because of the difficulties in communicating how it makes a person feel. The suffering it can cause an individual with asd is immense and many do attempt suicide. Sadly it is often not until a person with asd has attempted sucide that anyone realises just how much suffering they have endured often for months and years.
I write as one who gets to see some of the poor souls trying to pick up the pieces and fit into the community in the aftermath. Makes me feel like shaking society for making such peoples lifes so difficult over so many little petty things and marginalising them so much that this has been the result.

(Something I have strong opnions about.)

It is great to have strong opinions about this! However, you need to make sure you are looking at all sides of the equation. Remember, our society IS lazy, you are right to be concerned. But at times there are issues that come with giftedness that seem to be overlooked and classified as something else. IOW, if someone does not fit a neatly tied box, then it falls in the easy other category.

Yes, although temple is hyper, my son refuses to get his hair cut without screaming, light touch seriously bothers him at this time. Of course, he is 3 and it could be just a delay in sensory but I have an optimistic outlook. The post sat here overnight and it is obvious the OP was in need of some reassurance and positive enforcement.

I am really surprised that you would say that Aspergers patients are not usually gifted. In many respects I have seen and heard the opposite. Unless you are gauging by some Quotient testing or other testing that I am not familiar with.

However, I am sure that there are many that do not "possess" gifts by that measurement. I come from the angle that gifts present in various forms. Every child/person has a gift; some might not be “measurable” by as you yourself call it -- marginalization.

It is obvious by the OPs own statements that there is a remarkable amount of intellect, winning a scholarship for being 3rd in class. This in and of itself is a tell-tell sign that ignorance is not an issue. You don't score top 3% without it. Sensory issues also present in gifted (studious) children. Many studies have shown even ADD in boys especially may be caused by sensory processing. ADD, Autism and Asbergers have had historical ties.

So my point in my post is try to find a means to help relaxation, and in the meantime, keeping positive. I am as I said not a doctor. I don’t think that is what Christian forums is about. I think we are about being positive and encouraging when others are faced with difficult situations.

Furthermore, I think I was very clear on the issue of depression. Sometimes depression is a good thing, sometimes it is a bad thing. It seems that the OP is self aware of feelings as the tone of the post itself. I did not get at all that they are not in touch with their feelings?

I do have limited knowledge and I am sure you are the card carrying member of all pertinent information on this subject, a bit of encouragement based on facts drawn from the OP is nothing to scoff at.

Now for further study on what you call a “myth” – here are some peer review papers on the subject. To which I offer you a couple quotes to think about:

What is to be made of a child who can give a detailed genealogy of Christopher Columbus yet performs poorly in school (Neihart, 2000)? Or one who can draw detailed diagrams of atoms so precise they include neutron clusters and orbiting electrons yet had great difficulty learning how to get dressed independently (Osborne, 2000)?
Safran (2001) described children with Asperger's beings “little professors who can't understand social cues” (p. 151). They are highly verbal, have an intense interest in certain subjects, have excellent memories, usually have above average IQs, are hypersensitive to sensory stimuli, and experience social isolation (Neihart, 2000). Gifted children are also highly verbal, have intense interests in certain subjects, have excellent memories and above average IQs, can be hypersensitive to sensory stimuli, and it is not uncommon for them to experience social isolation (VanTassel-Baska, 1998).
~ WHICH IS IT? ASPERGER'S SYNDROME OR GIFTEDNESS? DEFINING THE DIFFERENCES

Over the years, researchers have frequently noted that many individuals with exceptional gifts manifest autistic-like behaviors. Further, an increasing number of individuals with autism or Asperger's are identified as being gifted. These twice-exceptional learners are in good company. Cash (1998) listed examples of eminent individuals who sometimes displayed autistic tendencies include Albert Einstein, Bobby Fischer, Sir Isaac Newton, and Vincent Van Gogh.
~ WHICH IS IT? ASPERGER'S SYNDROME OR GIFTEDNESS? DEFINING THE DIFFERENCES

• Gifted Children With Asperger's Syndrome. (cover story) By: Neihart, Maureen. Gifted Child Quarterly, Fall2000, Vol. 44 Issue 4, p222, 9p, 2 charts; (AN 3734205)
  
• Asperger's Syndrome in Gifted Individuals. By: Henderson, Lynnette M.. Gifted Child Today, Summer2001, Vol. 24 Issue 3, p28, 8p, 2 charts; (AN 5028716)
  
• WHICH IS IT? Asperger's Syndrome or Giftedness? Defining the Differences. By: Little, Cindy. Gifted Child Today, Winter2002, Vol. 25 Issue 1, p58, 6p; (AN 6153285)
  
• Attwood, T. (1998, January). The links between social stories, comic strip conversations and the cognitive models of autism and Asperger's syndrome. Retrieved March 5, 2001, from http://www.tonyattwood.com/paper5.htm
  
• Cash, A. B. (1999). A profile of gifted individuals with autism: The twice-exceptional learner. Roeper Review, 22, 22–27.
  
• Clark, Barbara (1997). Growing up gifted (5th ed.). Upper Saddle River: Prentice-Hall.
  
• Garnett, M.S., & Attwood, A. J. (1997). The Australian Scale for Asperger's Syndrome [Electronic version]. Retrieved March 7, 2001, from the Online Asperger Syndrome Information and Support Web site: http://www.udel.edu/bkirby/asperger/ aspergerscaleAttwood.html
  
• Goldberg-Edelson, M. (1995). Autism-related disorders in DSM-IV. Retrieved March 22, 2001, from the Center for the Study of Autism Web site: http://www.autism.org/dsm.html
  
• Grandin, T. (2001). An inside view of autism. Retrieved March 12, from the Center for the Study of Autism Web site: http://www,autism.org/temple/inside.html
  
• Gray, C. (1994). Comic strip conversations. Arlington, TX: Future Horizons.
  
• Klin, A., & Volkmar, E R. (1995, June). Asperger's syndrome: Guidelines of assessment and diagnosis. Retrieved March 7, 2001, from the Yale Child Study Center Web site: http://info.med.yale.edu/chldstdy/autism/page46.html
  
• Klin, A., & Volkmar, E R. (1996, March). Asperger's syndrome: Guidelines for treatment and intervention. Retrieved March 7, 2001, from the Yale Child Study Center Web site: http://info.med.yale.edu/chldstdy/autism/page51.html
  
• Mayberry, G. D. (2000, December). Michael—The story of an autistic photographer. PSA Journal 66(12), 30–33.
  
• Moore, D., McGrath, P., & Thorpe, J. (2000, August). Computer-aided learning for people with autism—a framework for research and development. Innovations in Education and Training International 37, 218–227.
  
• Neihart, M. (2000). Gifted children with Asperger's syndrome. Gifted Child Quarterly, 44, 222–230.
  
• Osborne, L. (2000, June 18). The little professor syndrome. [Electronic Version]. New York Times Magazine. 6–12.
  
• Pianoforte, K. (2000, July). The artist as a young man. The Exceptional Parent, 30(7), 70–71.
  
• Safran, S. P. (2000, Winter). Asperger syndrome: The emerging challenge to special education. Exceptional Children, 67(2), 151–160.
  
• VanTassel-Baska, J. (1998). Excellence in educating gifted & talented learners (3rd ed). Denver: Love.
  
• Williams, K. (1995, June). Understanding the student with Asperger's syndrome: Guidelines for teachers. Retrieved March 12, 2001, from the Online Asperger Syndrome Information and Support Web site: http://www.udel.edu/bkirby/asperger/karen_williams_guidelines.html

If you have a difficult time obtaining any of these studies let me know. I have access to these journals and can send them along. I do commend you for speaking truth. Just make sure you are seeing all sides and all possibilities before you jump the gun!

 

[vespasia]

It is great to have strong opinions about this! However, you need to make sure you are looking at all sides of the equation.

That is part of my job and that requires I am flexible and can look at both the person reacting and the person who was with them in the equation. I have the big advantage of being female.

Remember, our society IS lazy, you are right to be concerned. But at times there are issues that come with giftedness that seem to be overlooked and classified as something else. IOW, if someone does not fit a neatly tied box, then it falls in the easy other category.

I have studied socials structures at uni level (for fun) I choose to affect social change via lobbying and contributing to Ethical committees that contribute to UK Government 'White Papers'. 'Society' is more complex than merely 'lazy'


Yes, although temple is hyper, my son refuses to get his hair cut without screaming, light touch seriously bothers him at this time. Of course, he is 3 and it could be just a delay in sensory but I have an optimistic outlook. The post sat here overnight and it is obvious the OP was in need of some reassurance and positive enforcement.
No she is HYPO (understimulated by tactile sensory feedback) if she was HYPER she would run a mile and smash up her 'squeeze box' as an instrument of torture.

I am really surprised that you would say that Aspergers patients are not usually gifted. In many respects I have seen and heard the opposite. Unless you are gauging by some Quotient testing or other testing that I am not familiar with.
Having a specific thing a person is 'good' at does not meet the criteria for 'gifted and talented' within the UK. Less than 4% of the population even comes close to this. They are often talented but it is rare to find one who is gifted (ability to problem solve not merely retain facts and see spatial patterns and simplistic reasoning)
Always look for quantitive data to support an assertion. Offices of statistical returns covering education would be a good place to start.

However, I am sure that there are many that do not "possess" gifts by that measurement. I come from the angle that gifts present in various forms. Every child/person has a gift; some might not be “measurable” by as you yourself call it -- marginalization.
Every person has something they have aptitude for, this does not mean they are 'gifted' but they have an area that they enjoy are reasonably good at and that (even better) can give joy to others.

It is obvious by the OPs own statements that there is a remarkable amount of intellect, winning a scholarship for being 3rd in class. This in and of itself is a tell-tell sign that ignorance is not an issue.
Have you any idea how many with ASD in the UK FAIL to get basic qualifications never mind access Higher education. The OP is a minority member of a minority social grouping.
You don't score top 3% without it. Sensory issues also present in gifted (studious) children. Many studies have shown even ADD in boys especially may be caused by sensory processing. ADD, Autism and Asbergers have had historical ties.
ADD is considered part of the continuum as it is an associated co-morbidity. Sensory processing issues are not limited to ASD they can be associated with other cognitive processing difficulties. they are often seen amongst those with more limited intellectual capacity.

So my point in my post is try to find a means to help relaxation, and in the meantime, keeping positive. I am as I said not a doctor. I don’t think that is what Christian forums is about. I think we are about being positive and encouraging when others are faced with difficult situations.
I work with a range of very difficult people on behalf of a church liasing with medical services and community services.
Many present with challenging behaviour resulting from a form of mental distress. It is my job to ensure that their needs to function without harm are meet.

Furthermore, I think I was very clear on the issue of depression. Sometimes depression is a good thing, sometimes it is a bad thing. It seems that the OP is self aware of feelings as the tone of the post itself. I did not get at all that they are not in touch with their feelings?
I have yet to meet anyone in my work who expresses that 'depression' is a good thing. The only exception are those who have 'bi-polar' who can endure 'depression' because they live for the 'manic' phases.
ASD ARE in touch with feelings but not as NT think and the problem is in expressing as the nuances of social emotional language is impaired.

I do have limited knowledge and I am sure you are the card carrying member of all pertinent information on this subject, a bit of encouragement based on facts drawn from the OP is nothing to scoff at.
I just happen to work in the field from the inside out.

I read scientific and political journals for light relief. I am aware of the current debates on 'duality' in regards to 'giftness and SEN'
I have no problem obtaining journals because of the area I work with and the professionals I deal with and have done since I began in in secular social & community based work.


I am more concerned to flag that for those few who do make it to UNI that there is support available within the UK, the country of origin of the OP and the country whose education system I have to often act as advocate within.

 

[drifter5]

When i felt suicidal ,in the past, i found reading the psalms helpful, and a great comfort. Do NOT despair ,God IS with you. I was diagnosed with A.S two months ago. It is still taking time to adjust to. I heard God say to me that He loves me just the same, that my A.S does not matter to Him. I know that God can still use me. PRAISE HIS NAME ! I find sensory impairment affects my daily functioning. I get tired very easily. I am praying for you . You ARE so precious to God. Psalm121 v 1 , 2 : " I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills , from whence cometh my help." " My help cometh from The Lord, which made heaven and earth. "

 

[vespasia]

Yes it does take time to adjust.
I found out from collegues who worked in the NHS that they had had me tabbed as aspie as heck in all the years I had been liasing in community work. It was only after one of my longer tirades about how stupid people could be when faced with 'unexpected challenging behaviours' they told me. They did ask if I wanted to go for diagnosis.

IF I had still been in school I would have , it might have saved me from endless detentions for pointing out when teachers were wrong, had arrived at errenous conclusions over the motivation of others and so on. School was a nightmare. Uni came as a relief there were others there like me.....teaching!
I choose NOT to go ahead and take the 'official label' but I spent ages getting my head around the concept that I had been right when I thought that no one could see things form where I was and why school had been such a nightmare to endure.


Drifter5 which sensory issue/s are you trying to cope with?

 

[willmrcd1]

God Bless You,

The very fact that you have posted here and asked for support is a step in the right direction. Wow! I do not have Asperger Syndrome, but my 13 year old son does. I however was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. I find that both disorders have many similarities. There are bouts of depression. I never knew my son was depressed, because he never showed us emotion. He loves the same routines, loves to read and is good at it. He definitely is unique and has strange and odd behaviors that I have grown accustomed to. I have learned to accept who he is no matter what, but something happened this year when he turned 13 years old. He really noticed he was different. It was this label he kept hearing in the Doctor's office, around adults who thought he couldn't hear, school, etc. He has autism that is why he acts that way. Oh, he doesn't know how to socialize like the others he is different. Well he told his counselor he hated being autistic and that he had no friends. He cried and finally was able to show emotions. The fact that they gave him a label caused him to internalize his conditions.
It has taken me many months and days convincing him that although he does have this condition he can and will accomplish anything he wants. It's so important to speak the word of God. To activate our faith.
I too had a very difficult time with sleeping and was stress during college. I was not in a biomedical program which probably is so much more demanding, but school, working, being married and having a son with a disability was so stressful it triggered depression in such a wicked way that I too tried to take my own life.
I started to write and journal my feelings and ended up with a book about bipolar and autism and the ups and downs of being a Christian with it. " A Touch of Peace" was published last year and I look back now and wonder if I never went through those trials would I have ever graduated from school with two master degrees? Would I have ever become a special education teacher? Would I have ever become a published writer?

Know that you were designed for greatness. God has a plan for you and has a purpose for you. You will achieve all that He has in store for you. Believe that. Stay connected to the Lord. Read His Word and claim them for your life. Continue to seek help and support. I don't know if your doctor has given you medication to help you sleep and combat depression, but I know that medications do help.

Father I ask that you will help your child and give your child peace. Father give your child clarity of mind. Help you child sleep and give him wisdom as measureless as the seashore. Lord you are a healer and by your stripes we were healed. Thank you for protected your son from the hands of the enemy. In Jesus name, amen.

 

[uniquetadpole]

Hello everyone, I'm not sure if this is the right place or not but here goes:

I'm currently in my 2nd year at university in my Biomedical Science degree. I was diagnosed with AS in November and am still adjusting to the news. I've a lot to talk about and find it difficult to organise things properly, so bear with me if you can.

I've been through a bit of an experience these past few weeks. I was taking severe panic attacks, vomiting and going into hysterics because of my impending exams. I was in such a state that I eventually took an overdose of propanolol (beta blockers), and was rushed into hospital where I stayed overnight. I have suffered from depression and anxiety in the past but have never attempted suicide until now. Everyone kept telling me that I'm smart and would pass my exams with flying colours, etc but I just felt out of control and wanted it all to stop, so I took the pills.

I have been able to postpone my exams until August, which was a bit of a relief but I'm worried it will all happen again. I'd rather not try to kill myself again but I want to get my degree.

I'm not sure why the exams caused me such distress. I was fine during my 1st semester exams in 1st year and I was worried during my 2nd semester exams but not like I was this time. I'm also pretty intelligent, I won a scholarship for being in the top 3 in my class.

My parents and therapist have suggested it could have been because I just found out I had AS, which was a relief at first but then turned into a huge shock when I released "I really am different!". My dog also died recently, which was a huge loss (I know it might sound silly but I was devastated when he died). The work load in university has also increased a lot this year, and I was finding it difficult to juggle everything (due to the AS), so I was pretty stressed out all semester. Everything "bubbled" up to the surface due to the pressure of the exams and exploded.

I have informed the Disability Services at the university about my AS. They are going to provide me with support, which should hopefully help when I have to do my exams again.

At the minute my sleep pattern is out of whack, which is why I'm posting this at 3.30am. I've been sitting up on my computer (my special interest) for hours. I'm a little worried that I'm going to sink into depression, because this is what happened the last time I was depressed - I slept all day and woke at night.

Sorry for the length, but i just felt like I wanted to tell someone. has anyone else with AS experienced anything like this? Did everything work out ok for you?

I have been recently diagnosed with AS within the last two years... so in a sense I am one step ahead of you in adjusting to my diagnosis...I think I finally came out of the denial stage and into the ager stage of the grief of who I thought I was... mixed with the depression stage... the depression is repressed anger... anger that we had but had no comprehension as to why or at what we were angry with... and you have had so much stuff at one time... even someone without AS would have had difficulty coping. Those of us with AS have the added emotional challenges on top of that...so I am not surprised to read your reactions to the stress... but perhaps take a look at it this way... you now have time to process it closer to your pace so that you can cope with it all better. You did the best you could with what you knew to do. Work at responding differently this time... as the strss builds find ways to release it over time... there are loads of relaxation methods out there...one that I am finding that works for me is a meditation CD... I read how it helped a parents child who had AS relax each night before going to bed so I thought I would try it...and bingo... most of the time I can fall asleep before the CD is finished AND STAY asleep all night. Something I have never really accomplished before. I still have to work on remembering to play it every night because it doesn't always occur to me to. But in time I will get a few more... and go from there... if you are interested Indigo Dreams is the name of it.

Also since you got an extension until August...perhaps you can take one at a time instead of all around the same time...lighten up the stress.

I hope this helps some.

Tad

PS I understand about the dog... I connect to animals...not to people really.