Need help

[PerformerNeedsHelp]

Hi. I'd really like to have an answer from men on this, because I'm a guy, but somehow as a new member here I cannot post in the men's area.

I need advice. I'm a solo performer in the gay-for-pay sex industry and I want out. It's not as easy as just stopping doing what I'm doing. The money and the desire to show off breaks down my resolve every time I decide I'm going to quit. It's just to easy to go back to it, and get the personal satisfaction of being told how much I'm turning guys on and getting guys off. I use the money I make from it as an excuse to justify what I'm doing.

Even though some may debate if the gay lifestyle is okay with God, what I do generates lust and whatever side of the gay lifestyle argument you're on, I don't think it makes porn okay. One could argue the service I provide allows a safer release than actual hookups, but I don't want to be the means by which that is achieved anymore.

I just don't know what to do and want your thoughts please.

Thanks.

 

[BlondieLashes]

Hi Performer! I apologize in advance that we do not have many men that frequent the survivors of the sex industry forum. I really don't know why. I didn't want to leave your post unanswered though because I feel the seriousness of it.

Have you ever checked out Shelley Lubben's website or have you ever heard of her? The reason that I ask is that she is Christian (as I see you are too) and she has helped a lot of men get out of the industry.

I know I am not a man, but I used to be in the industry too. I know the struggle with the money. Do you have any type of other work that you would consider (for example I went into being a personal trainer after leaving the industry - many performers are in great shape and know how to train- just a thought).

Anyway- Welcome to the forum. I hope we can be of some help. Here's a link to Shelley's website - Keep in mind she does help men too.shelleylubben.com | Former Porn Actress Shelley Lubben

God bless you!

 

[BlondieLashes]

Performer- How are you doing? I hope you stick around here and keep us up to date as to how you are. We really aren't all that bad!

 

[PerformerNeedsHelp]

Hi and thanks for the message. I'm hanging on here but still struggling.

 

[BlondieLashes]

I can imagine you are still struggling. What are you looking for in terms of advice? Did you get a chance to check out Shelley's site? Glad you responded...I was afraid we scared you away!

 

[BlondieLashes]

Still thinking of you and wondering how you are doing.

 

[Jazer]

I just don't know what to do and want your thoughts please.

You can not be double minded, you have to 100% decide that you want out.

5 If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. 6 But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind. 7 For let not that man suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; 8 he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.

 

[PerformerNeedsHelp]

Still thinking of you and wondering how you are doing.

Have been gone and am now back. If I follow through with some plans in the morning it will be a big step. Just need the strength to follow through.

 

[BlondieLashes]

Have been gone and am now back. If I follow through with some plans in the morning it will be a big step. Just need the strength to follow through.

Praying for you. Let us know how it goes!

 

[PerformerNeedsHelp]

I feel like part of me has died. I disposed of everything I used when I performed including cameras and I closed a chat account I kept in touch with people with. Also wiped the drive of my laptop I used when I was online. Now I just hurt.

 

[BlondieLashes]

I feel like part of me has died. I disposed of everything I used when I performed including cameras and I closed a chat account I kept in touch with people with. Also wiped the drive of my laptop I used when I was online. Now I just hurt.

Wow! Good for you! Those are really big steps in the right direction! I am so sorry you are hurting though. I really am. Do you have a church you go to?

 

[PerformerNeedsHelp]

I do have a church and have been attending all along through this.

 

[BlondieLashes]

Great that you have a church you attend! Do you feel comfortable talking to someone there about what you are struggling with or is it way too difficult?

 

[PerformerNeedsHelp]

Was chatting with someone I met on here and have been trying to track him down today. Part of my actions this morning were to close a yahoo account I had him on and now need to reconnect to his account.

 

[BlondieLashes]

Do you remember his username here on the forums? If you do could you send him a private message here on the forums? Just trying to think of how you could avoid temptation.

 

[PerformerNeedsHelp]

We got reconnected. Thanks.

 

[InTheCloud]

Have you tried to do a self examination on why you landed in the industry in the first time and why is so hard for you to quit?

 

[BlondieLashes]

How are you doing? I have the name of someone that might be able to help you...Billy Lind- SkyJoy ministries. He is a former sex worker with a great outreach for men. Just connected with him. Let me know if you want his contact info.

 

[Jazer]

I feel like part of me has died.

Romans talks a lot about how we need to die to self. That seems to be a part of the process. We deny self, so that the life of God can live in us. It is all a part of being born again. Rom 6:5 "that our old man was crucified with Him, that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves of sin". The new me in Christ is as real as the death my old man died. Rom 6:13-14 but present yourselves to God as being alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness to God.

 

[BlondieLashes]

Hope you are doing well... Here is a link to Billy Lind's story. Let me know if you ever want to get in touch with him. He has a ministry to men in the industry...

Billy's Last Hope - CBN TV - Video