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need help with a relationship.

QU3TIP_24

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Aug 13, 2009
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There is this girl i have liked for awhile and we talk occasionally, we are not the best of friends but we are more than aquiatinces. Anyways, as i said i have liked her for a bit. She started going out with one of my friends, and instead of being a jerk and trying to break them up, (which i would never do) i admitted defeat and tried to forget about it. Their reltionship did not last long, so i thought it was my chance. But i didn't want to look like i was getting a girl on the "rebound" so i held off for a bit. Then about a month or so later i decided that i should go for it. Turns out, i waited too long. She likes someone else now and i didn't even get a chance. Maybe this is a sign that its not ment to be?
 

asianchexmix

No, I'm not sleeping I just have small eyes
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There is this girl i have liked for awhile and we talk occasionally, we are not the best of friends but we are more than aquiatinces. Anyways, as i said i have liked her for a bit. She started going out with one of my friends, and instead of being a jerk and trying to break them up, (which i would never do) i admitted defeat and tried to forget about it. Their reltionship did not last long, so i thought it was my chance. But i didn't want to look like i was getting a girl on the "rebound" so i held off for a bit. Then about a month or so later i decided that i should go for it. Turns out, i waited too long. She likes someone else now and i didn't even get a chance. Maybe this is a sign that its not ment to be?

As we are on a Christian forum, I must ask you this: how much have you prayed about her? How much have you prayed for her? How much were you more concerned in being a great older brother in Christ than being her boyfriend/husband? Perhaps you have done all these things and you just did not mention it. If that's the case, kudos! Not many brothers do that and it's a vital step in any relationship. If not, this is a great place to start.

If you have been praying, I'd say keep praying and just see where He leads. Just know that whomever He has for you, it's better than the current girl you like. That is so hard to accept and so hard to swallow but it's completely true. I've liked girls and then my liking for girls keep getting bigger and bigger because the girls keep getting better and better. WHEN WILL IT STOP?! ;)
 
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caireann

Go dtaga do ríocht
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asianchexmix is right... pray about it. Pray and pray and pray. If it is 'meant to be', if this is who God has set aside for you, then it WILL be. Remember though, that God's timing isn't always the same as ours. I know couples who were together, or friends, and got seperated for 10+ years before they were reunited and married.

Always keep your focus on the Lord and trust in Him, He will guide your path :)
 
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Autumnleaf

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Don't only pray about this. Talk to the girl on a daily basis. It seems like you like the idea of being with this girl but you don't know her that well. There are few things worse than being in love with the idea of being in love. Its self delusional. Start calling this girl daily or every few days and just talk with her as friends. Things will either go your way or they won't. If you had been doing that to begin with you could have easily picked her up on the rebound, which is not bad so long as you don't sex her while she's vulnerable. That is considered faux pas.

Praying can't hurt but it would be like praying for your mother to cook you your favorite meal. Sometimes we have to do some of the lifting.
 
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heron

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If she dropped and started another relationship soon after, then this one will probably be short too. But be prepared that she might like short relationships, including one with you.

People need at least a few years to test the waters and see what they want in a relationship. Women often aspire to date the edgy men, but then find that being wanted is not the same as being loved.

You have remained a constant in her life through these relationships. If she dates long enough to see that what she thought she wanted isn't what will get her through life well, then she is more likely to appreciate her time with you.

Hang in there. And yes, keep praying.
 
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