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Myself

Discussion in 'General Struggles' started by Nobody1103, Apr 12, 2021.

  1. Nobody1103

    Nobody1103 New Member

    1
    +1
    Canada
    Non-Denom
    Private
    Hello everyone, I am new to Christian Forums and to this forum, but to start I will say I am a male in my early twenties living with bipolar disorder, as well as generalized anxiety disorder and ADHD.

    I always knew about my ADHD and Anxiety from a long time ago, but I was diagnosed as well with Bipolar Type 3 about a month ago. Since then, I've been taking my medications and it's kept me neutral for the most part, however there are some other things I deal with as a result of my disorders.

    Aside from the crazy highs and crushing lows I used to feel,
    My faith in God has gotten a lot weaker, I used to be a much more fervent Christian in my late teens, but Religious OCD essentially made me afraid of God, and realizing that my hypomania was what appeared to be my high interest in religion back then, was the final blow to my faith. I was left confused, wondering if I really felt God or just the manifestations of my chemical imbalance. Not to mention, this disorder skews my self-identity at times, some days I wake up feeling like a new person, only to change my image the following week. It affects everything from my beliefs (I go between Christian to Agnostic) to my sexuality (I go between Straight and Asexual, although to be fair I identify as asexual, even when my head feels it is not), and many other parts of my identity.

    I'm sorry for rambling, I guess I'm just looking to see if there is anyone else here who has a similar condition or is going through something similar. I'm trying to figure myself out now, because I do want a normal life, I have always wanted a girlfriend (someone to love and share my life with) as well as have a career in something, but of course I need to figure out my identity first

    Thanks
     
    We teamed up with Faith Counseling. Can they help you today?
  2. Llleopard

    Llleopard Active Member

    280
    +258
    New Zealand
    Christian
    Married
    Welcome to the forums:) wow, you have a lot going on in your head, so respect for getting out of bed each day and working towards your goals!
    I am ace, and have anxiety, which has been a challenge my whole life (53) but I also have had successful careers, a great marriage to an allo, and a pretty good life overall! I think you will find some like minds on here, and certainly encouragement. Hang in there.
     
  3. Carl Emerson

    Carl Emerson Well-Known Member

    +5,345
    New Zealand
    Christian
    Married
    You will probably get a range of opinions on this...

    My take from my personal experience is as follows...

    Your identity is in Christ - not the labels that contemporary thinking puts on you.

    If I was in your shoes I would have really chased God and healing and deliverance. That means finding a church that is equipped to support you in that journey. Don't expect instant success - it took me 7 years to come out and be 'normal'

    I attended the healing 'order of St. Luke' every week for a year before being healed of a wound in the spirit. That was just one step along the way.

    I prayerfully read nothing but scripture for 5 years.

    The more prayer and ministry you get the faster your journey out. That was 45 years ago.

    I am not talking about an easy road - I would attend church and weep all the way through the service. Few understood or spoke to me.

    But God came through big time - my life now is more than I could ask or think.

    It is all to do with putting Jesus first no matter what.

    Welcome to CF - feel free to PM me if you want to discuss more privately.
     
  4. Tolworth John

    Tolworth John Well-Known Member Supporter

    +3,516
    United Kingdom
    Non-Denom
    Married
    May I ask why?
    What has caused you not to trust in God or Jesus?

    The basic facts about Jesus' incarnation, his brutal death, burial and resurrection have not changed, all that has changed is how you either ' feel ,' about these facts or how you view them.

    Feelings are important, but they are not the most important. Most decisions are made using one's ability to reason and work things out, to evaluate the advantages and disadvantages, now feeling do influences this but it is an influence not a casting vote.

    Please reexamine what in your opinion makes you a Christian. Ask your pastor for advice and see if this changes your view of Jesus.
     
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