The reason I'm writing my story is because I've been reading about how someones story can help others and give opportunities to help others. So here goes...
I've always lived and been brought up in a Christian family. I have always had the backing of loving parents and a very good sister. But this does not mean I did not want to sample 'life' for myself!
I am not proud of these things I will tell but I am saying them to show you how much I changed since 're-meeting' God. In 1998 I accepted Jesus as my Saviour and got baptised... the end of all wrong? Nope. Far from it. I was all out for God at first and only wanted to serve Him. But then I went wrong.
For me this way of going wrong got quite common. I would do something really bad and then think 'God wouldn't want me back now' so I'd just do worse.
I 've never actually told ANYONE the next bit as I've been too ashamed. At probably the lowest point in my life I started on pornography. Buying dirty magazines and stuff. This is not the smartest thing I've done as it has plagued me right up through me life. I seemed to deliberately open myself to temptation and just go straight on with my 'Christian' life. I still went to church. This was becuase of my mum. I see that as being very helpful now because I was still learning and God was using it to breaking down barriers.
Pornography seemed like a drug habit for me and I needed a 'fix' of it every so often. I was hopelessly adictted. I was spend huge amounts of money and not actually getting anything for it. I was paying to poison my mind.
I also used to 'swear like a trooper' cussing all the time and had the most violent temper. I would fight and swear and use weapons to attack my brother. I am really ashamed that stuff like that ever came out of me.
I don't actually remember the presice way I 're-became' a Christian but I do know that God would not let me go. I wasn't made to serve an evil master. I was made to serve God. I prayed and prayed that God would help me to stop swearing and now I only ever swear by accident. I am actually much more peaceful now and only seldomly lose my temper! I love being more peaceful!
I now say, 'I HATE PORNOGRAPHY!' I really do. It has ruined a big portion of my life so far. But now I've changed and want to stay that way!
The thing is I opened myself up to pornography so much that it has left a huge scar in my life that still needs to be healed and I would REALLY REALLY appreciate prayers for that area of my life as I still struggle.
I SERVE ONLY MY GOD NOW!!
I've always lived and been brought up in a Christian family. I have always had the backing of loving parents and a very good sister. But this does not mean I did not want to sample 'life' for myself!
I am not proud of these things I will tell but I am saying them to show you how much I changed since 're-meeting' God. In 1998 I accepted Jesus as my Saviour and got baptised... the end of all wrong? Nope. Far from it. I was all out for God at first and only wanted to serve Him. But then I went wrong.
For me this way of going wrong got quite common. I would do something really bad and then think 'God wouldn't want me back now' so I'd just do worse.
I 've never actually told ANYONE the next bit as I've been too ashamed. At probably the lowest point in my life I started on pornography. Buying dirty magazines and stuff. This is not the smartest thing I've done as it has plagued me right up through me life. I seemed to deliberately open myself to temptation and just go straight on with my 'Christian' life. I still went to church. This was becuase of my mum. I see that as being very helpful now because I was still learning and God was using it to breaking down barriers.
Pornography seemed like a drug habit for me and I needed a 'fix' of it every so often. I was hopelessly adictted. I was spend huge amounts of money and not actually getting anything for it. I was paying to poison my mind.
I also used to 'swear like a trooper' cussing all the time and had the most violent temper. I would fight and swear and use weapons to attack my brother. I am really ashamed that stuff like that ever came out of me.
I don't actually remember the presice way I 're-became' a Christian but I do know that God would not let me go. I wasn't made to serve an evil master. I was made to serve God. I prayed and prayed that God would help me to stop swearing and now I only ever swear by accident. I am actually much more peaceful now and only seldomly lose my temper! I love being more peaceful!
I now say, 'I HATE PORNOGRAPHY!' I really do. It has ruined a big portion of my life so far. But now I've changed and want to stay that way!
The thing is I opened myself up to pornography so much that it has left a huge scar in my life that still needs to be healed and I would REALLY REALLY appreciate prayers for that area of my life as I still struggle.
I SERVE ONLY MY GOD NOW!! Well I don't know if I've gone against any etiquet(or however you say it!) in this but it has has made me feel much better and I notice just how much my Lord has fought for me. I hope this story of some of my life helps someone somewhere! And I know I am still far from perfection!
God Bless!
pete
