My Journey with OCD.

[Harley.]

My name is Harley. A decent number of people on here will recognize my posts as over the last two years I have posted obsessively about my OCD. Typically asking similar or at times IDENTICAL things.

From my earliest memories I have suffered from OCD. I was one of the rare lucky cases to actually be BORN with OCD. And not develop it in my teens or later on. OCD is all ive ever known.

"Do X or Y will happen"
"Touch that 5 times or Y bad thing will occur"
"Say that again or Y bad thing will happen"
yadda yadda yadda. There are INFINITE variations. I always followed these commands, for I feared the threatened outcome. Leading to ridicule and torment in school for my repeated answers.

For over a year I lost all drive to work on my music, as I am a full time composer.

Im just listing things, because I want everyone to understand how screwed up I was. Tormented day and night. I spent my entire childhood fearing that if I didnt do X I would die or someone I loved would die or get cancer or WHATEVER.

I have spent years in and out of therapists, meds, etc. But finally I discovered a revelation, which has shown me that I truly can disregard these thoughts. Over 30 times in the bible we are told not to worry. To trust God. By listening to these thoughts, (which I always thought were FROM God) I am not trusting in God, but in my own actions for my safety. This is directly against what the bible teaches.

I just hope if anyone is out there suffering from this same thing, that this can help you as much as its helped me. And hopefully it doesnt take you two decades to find this truth.

Godbless.

 

[timf]

You should be commended for sharing your experiences in a desire to help others.

While possibly aggravated by physiology and nutrition, OCD can weave a complicated relationship between anxieties and behaviors that are constructed to give a sense of control from which a reduction of anxiety might be obtained. Being able to reduce the source of anxieties is to be encouraged as it addresses the source. Devising and altering control strategies do not seem to last in their effectiveness as they do not address the source.