My Appologies

[Watchman4hm]

Ive been here a long time. Been through many battles/debates/strife, etc..Alot of my issues were based on righteous indignation. However, that doesnt give me the right to pass judgement on Gods children. I apologize to anyone Ive offended and humbly ask your forgiveness..

I was very loving when I started my online fellowship years ago on another board on AOL...Soon I was involved in "defending the faith" from people who were espousing false doctrine..These were oneness Pentecostals from UPC who had no problem declaring that if you weren't baptized in Jesus name only you weren't saved. If you didn't speak in tongues you weren't saved, etc, etc.

After two years I had posted some 35,000 posts, was weary and had become unloving in my dealings with others. At the time I had met another person whom I became friends with. A very knowledgeable person. I learned much from him, however I also picked up some bad traits as well. One of those traits was deciding who was saved and who wasn't by looking at their beliefs and posts. Even to the point of deciding who was apostate and who had become tares in the church..I also gained a dangerous trait of thinking to highly of myself during this friendship..This friend also had extra biblical visions based on his beliefs garnered from extra biblical writings..Some things I began to believe somewhat, and some things I just put on a shelf with the attitude "we'll see".

The most dangerous thing from this relationship though was the loss of genuine love for others even if they didn't agree with us.. I had learned from this friend that to disagree with us was to disagree with God...A very dangerous thing to think to say the least, and extremely prideful on our part. My thoughts towards other began to be very pessimistic, and fellowship with others in the body became next to impossible. I allowed this relationship to influence me and disrupt who God desired for me to be..It was all my fault and no blame can be put anywhere else but upon me. ( Matthew 24:4)

It has surely been a struggle at times to shake the demonic influence that came from those years. At times I find myself going backwards again and acting as I did then...Please forgive me..Some of you were here long ago, and Im sure you remember what Im speaking of...

There's no time left for this constant bickering that goes on here...It poisons our spirits and keeps us from fulfilling the commandment to love others as ourselves...We all shall be held accountable for what we believe and how we acted upon those beliefs..If God respected us enough to give us free will to choose/believe Him or not, we need to afford the same grace towards others as well..

God bless you all as you strive to hear Him, follow Him, and serve Him!

 

[mrhappy3]

Only a big man can say such - well done x - I think the loss of love for the our fellow ma is something the Church as a whole has struggled with, yet the LORD made it his greatest command. Amazing really.

Bless you sir...and remember next time we have a disagreement, I am normally right. LOL !

 

[ByTheSpirit]

Even when you're wrong, you're right huh? LOL Just playing

 

[FoundInGrace]

Ive been here a long time. Been through many battles/debates/strife, etc..Alot of my issues were based on righteous indignation. However, that doesnt give me the right to pass judgement on Gods children. I apologize to anyone Ive offended and humbly ask your forgiveness..

I was very loving when I started my online fellowship years ago on another board on AOL...Soon I was involved in "defending the faith" from people who were espousing false doctrine..These were oneness Pentecostals from UPC who had no problem declaring that if you weren't baptized in Jesus name only you weren't saved. If you didn't speak in tongues you weren't saved, etc, etc.

After two years I had posted some 35,000 posts, was weary and had become unloving in my dealings with others. At the time I had met another person whom I became friends with. A very knowledgeable person. I learned much from him, however I also picked up some bad traits as well. One of those traits was deciding who was saved and who wasn't by looking at their beliefs and posts. Even to the point of deciding who was apostate and who had become tares in the church..I also gained a dangerous trait of thinking to highly of myself during this friendship..This friend also had extra biblical visions based on his beliefs garnered from extra biblical writings..Some things I began to believe somewhat, and some things I just put on a shelf with the attitude "we'll see".

The most dangerous thing from this relationship though was the loss of genuine love for others even if they didn't agree with us.. I had learned from this friend that to disagree with us was to disagree with God...A very dangerous thing to think to say the least, and extremely prideful on our part. My thoughts towards other began to be very pessimistic, and fellowship with others in the body became next to impossible. I allowed this relationship to influence me and disrupt who God desired for me to be..It was all my fault and no blame can be put anywhere else but upon me. ( Matthew 24:4)

It has surely been a struggle at times to shake the demonic influence that came from those years. At times I find myself going backwards again and acting as I did then...Please forgive me..Some of you were here long ago, and Im sure you remember what Im speaking of...

There's no time left for this constant bickering that goes on here...It poisons our spirits and keeps us from fulfilling the commandment to love others as ourselves...We all shall be held accountable for what we believe and how we acted upon those beliefs..If God respected us enough to give us free will to choose/believe Him or not, we need to afford the same grace towards others as well..

God bless you all as you strive to hear Him, follow Him, and serve Him!

God bless you. I too used to be more loving in my interactions with others then I came here to this forum and learnt bad ways of interacting with others (from probinson mainly) and became harsh and bitter in my dealing with others as a result also (i have not fully forgiven probinson obviously for the hurt he caused my soul and what I learnt about mocking others he was a good teacher in how he treated me badly i learnt to treat others the same way, but I am working on it slowly with the Lord because while his behavior did harm me, I do realise I am still responsible before the Lord for my own actions now that I realise what has happened adn the foothold the devil gained).

I commend you for what you have said because in some ways I can relate and am trying to find my way back to God again myself in similar ways. so yes may God bless you very much for what you have said here.

 

[Watchman4hm]

Only a big man can say such - well done x - I think the loss of love for the our fellow ma is something the Church as a whole has struggled with, yet the LORD made it his greatest command. Amazing really.

Bless you sir...and remember next time we have a disagreement, I am normally right. LOL !

Thanks for understanding

 

[Yitzchak]

Having a soft heart is one of the most important things in life. Only God can restore to us a soft heart. May God grant us the wisdom to guard our hearts.

Pro 4:23 Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.

 

[ibelongtothelord]

watchman4hm,
Not only are you right, but who couldn't appreciate that level of honesty? It's rare in my church for members to admit their frailties, much less confess their personal sins and battles to one another! THEY DON'T WANT TO DO THAT!! This post was a major refreshment! Than you for that

 

[Snakebite]

snip

I like you dude,
read a couple of your posts. Its guys like you that made me come here.
Integrity, thats a rare thing these days.
May the Lord bless you.

 

[probinson]

Absolutely excellent post! I've noticed something different about you lately Watchman, and even though I'm sure we most certainly still have our doctrinal disagreements, I am pleased to be able to call you my brother in Christ without reservation.

 

[orangeness365]

I have the same problem with judging people. I'm a hypocrite. I even went through a phase of judging who was saved and who wasn't. I'm glad you have had a change of heart. It's for the best.

 

[Watchman4hm]

I noticed after awhile that I had a hardness of heart towards others..A judgmental pessimistic hardness of heart..I even became a bit paranoid that people just wanted to argue scriptures for the sake or arguing, and not because the were at different levels of faith, but we had decided what others lacked we had, and they just needed what we had...My friend although a brilliant teacher, had many hurts that I believe helped skew his "genuine" love and care for others..We all have issues but to elevate knowledge above love is detrimental to the life of a Christian. (1Corinthians 8:1)

If we allow the disagreement of others with what we espouse as truth to cause hurt to us, and we retaliate with innuendo aimed at them when posting, who is really the one with the problem? Is it not the one who is offended and then being offensive?..This was my trap...

Romans 2:1Therefore thou art inexcusable, O man, whosoever thou art that judgest: for wherein thou judgest another, thou condemnest thyself; for thou that judgest doest the same things. 2But we are sure that the judgment of God is according to truth against them which commit such things. 3And thinkest thou this, O man, that judgest them which do such things, and doest the same, that thou shalt escape the judgment of God? 4Or despisest thou the riches of his goodness and forbearance and longsuffering; not knowing that the goodness of God leadeth thee to repentance? 5But after thy hardness and impenitent heart treasurest up unto thyself wrath against the day of wrath and revelation of the righteous judgment of God; 6Who will render to every man according to his deeds: 7To them who by patient continuance in well doing seek for glory and honour and immortality, eternal life: 8But unto them that are contentious, and do not obey the truth, but obey unrighteousness, indignation and wrath, 9Tribulation and anguish, upon every soul of man that doeth evil, of the Jew first, and also of the Gentile; 10But glory, honour, and peace, to every man that worketh good, to the Jew first, and also to the Gentile: 11For there is no respect of persons with God.

 

[ByTheSpirit]

I noticed after awhile that I had a hardness of heart towards others..A judgmental pessimistic hardness of heart..I even became a bit paranoid that people just wanted to argue scriptures for the sake or arguing, and not because the were at different levels of faith, but we had decided what others lacked we had, and they just needed what we had...My friend although a brilliant teacher, had many hurts that I believe helped skew his "genuine" love and care for others..We all have issues but to elevate knowledge above love is detrimental to the life of a Christian. (1Corinthians 8:1)

If we allow the disagreement of others with what we espouse as truth to cause hurt to us, and we retaliate with innuendo aimed at them when posting, who is really the one with the problem? Is it not the one who is offended and then being offensive?..This was my trap...

Romans 2:1Therefore thou art inexcusable, O man, whosoever thou art that judgest: for wherein thou judgest another, thou condemnest thyself; for thou that judgest doest the same things. 2But we are sure that the judgment of God is according to truth against them which commit such things. 3And thinkest thou this, O man, that judgest them which do such things, and doest the same, that thou shalt escape the judgment of God? 4Or despisest thou the riches of his goodness and forbearance and longsuffering; not knowing that the goodness of God leadeth thee to repentance? 5But after thy hardness and impenitent heart treasurest up unto thyself wrath against the day of wrath and revelation of the righteous judgment of God; 6Who will render to every man according to his deeds: 7To them who by patient continuance in well doing seek for glory and honour and immortality, eternal life: 8But unto them that are contentious, and do not obey the truth, but obey unrighteousness, indignation and wrath, 9Tribulation and anguish, upon every soul of man that doeth evil, of the Jew first, and also of the Gentile; 10But glory, honour, and peace, to every man that worketh good, to the Jew first, and also to the Gentile: 11For there is no respect of persons with God.

Humility

 

[Watchman4hm]

I was in a dark basement looking around wondering why I was down there...I looked to my left and saw a window right at ground level that was letting in a bit of Light..Right about the time I turned back from looking at the window I heard a fluttering above my head and felt a breeze in my hair...I immediately thought it was a bat and I started swing upwards over my head in terror not wanting to be bitten.. One of my swing hit the creature and the fluttering above my head stopped..I looked back over towards the light that was coming in through the basement window and on the floor lay a sparrow with one wing kinda laying outstretched on the ground as though wounded...To my amazement when I walked toward the sparrow it didn't try to get away..So I reached down and put my forefinger out to pick the bird up and to my surprise it got right on my finger...I began to pet the birds head and neck with my forefinger and the bird began to coo like a pigeon..I thought this all to be quite strange and wondered why the heck a sparrow would be down here in the darkness of a basement...I thought to myself this bird must have been here for quite some time and must be hungry...I was thinking of feeding it, but thought God takes care of all of us including the sparrows...So I started up the stairs to let the sparrow go out the door and as I opened the door the warmth of the sunlight and fresh air seemed so wonderful until I pushed the bird off my finger to fly...I then felt sad and though maybe God wanted me to feed it..Then I awoke from the dream and before I could finish asking for the interpretation God gave it to me..

The basement represents this fallen dark world..The sparrow that I thought was a bat represents those whom God has ordained for me to help, but I had misunderstood who they were because of a wrong mindset..I had viewed the sparrow as danger to me personally and I was selfishly caught up into my own prideful ambitions...The sunlight at the door was refreshing to me but I still had neglected the call for others when I let the sparrow go without the nourishment it needs ...I knew this because of remembering the cooing that it was doing after I was rubbing its head..I was failing at my calling..

 

[Ajax 777]

We all have issues but to elevate knowledge above love is detrimental to the life of a Christian.

That about completely sums it up for me.

 

[Angeldove97]

Good for you- how kind of you and what a testimony to the Christian faith as some Christians are going through the season of Lent.

You gave me a few things to think about myself. God bless!

 

[D2wing]

I am concerned about myself and these forums for the same reason. I came for fellowship, instead find bickering and ridiculous arguments. Instead of a place to come together it is a place to tear up and be divided by pigeon holes.

 

[Watchman4hm]

I am concerned about myself and these forums for the same reason. I came for fellowship, instead find bickering and ridiculous arguments. Instead of a place to come together it is a place to tear up and be divided by pigeon holes.

I can relate to what your saying, but your the one who decides how to react. The things I did were of my own choosing and I can blame no other..The best advise I could give is steer clear from those whom you discern have an agenda of their own to manipulate others to either believing what they believe, feel sorry for them, or steer your heart in a direction other than Gods..Many do these things out of ignorance, and some do it trying to garner a following...Either way our call is to stay close to HIM so you are not deceived..Ive seen many come here to CF in the years Ive been here to try to get people on their bandwagon so to speak..They usually think they have a revelation unknown to any other, and are a mini savior to the world...They will set up websites with all kinds of beautiful graphics to make it look like they are for real, and put massive amount of information to wade through to make you think they're brilliant..Most of these people think they are beyond reproach and not accountable to you, but will expect you be accountable to them..Some try to start prayer groups to decide who "really" needs prayer under the guise of gossip and slander..Usually the leaders of such try to make their subordinate's feel as though they are special as well, which appeals to the flesh and need to feel important..Guard your heart above all things and stay tuned into the Lord and HIS agenda for your life..Above all remember that people make mistakes here and you need to forgive them, but make sure you allow no one to manipulate you through posts here that are designed to heap guilt upon you and make you question your walk with God...Thats not their place and is demonic in origin..

 

[D2wing]

Thank you brother and Amen. I think I have found the fellowship I have sought. I also thank the others that have posted here. I agree with you in love and blessings.

 

[Watchman4hm]

I want to share with you how judgmentalism magnifies in a person when allowed to go unrepented of...Its like leaven, and continues to defile the person...Usually these people will try to justify themselves as I did under the guise of "the rhema words of God".. They're excuse is they are lead of the Spirit to speak to the lost, backslidden, rebellious, or Christians who just dont have it right in THEIR eyes...They will use scripture after scripture, post after post, to try and "defend" themselves as being right..All the while beating down the imaginary opponents...It has been a hard lesson to learn, but Im glad for the lesson none the less..I have repented, been restored, and am again enjoying life "more abundantly"..HALLELUJAH

In reality, there was much more negative thinking and judgment than there is love with these types..They will claim they are doing everything our of love...Yet 1 Corinthians 13 says love thinketh no evil..Yes God still reveals things He wants said to others about sin, but its not as normal as some would have you to believe..The lack of love is very evident when we see others speaking, accusing, lying, etc, to try make themselves look "RIGHT"....They can teach some truths and yet not live it..Many shall say in that day Lord, Lord, did we not............

Just remember the devil can quote scriptures to you through people when he has them operating in the flesh...He also causes fleshly people to use partial scriptures to make himself seem more righteous ...Satan wished to have the preeminence...He desired the worship that was to be rightfully Gods..Some do this also when they try to beat down Gods people..

The bible tells us that the fall of Satan was caused by pride..(Isaiah 14) Here's some types of beating that some put on others..

BROWBEATING
It takes a certain amount of pride to browbeat others with scriptures.. It takes a certain amount of hardness of the heart, coupled with pride to insist that to disagree with you is to disagree with God..

Romans 2:1Therefore thou art inexcusable, O man, whosoever thou art that judgest: for wherein thou judgest another, thou condemnest thyself; for thou that judgest doest the same things. 2But we are sure that the judgment of God is according to truth against them which commit such things. 3And thinkest thou this, O man, that judgest them which do such things, and doest the same, that thou shalt escape the judgment of God? 4Or despisest thou the riches of his goodness and forbearance and longsuffering; not knowing that the goodness of God leadeth thee to repentance? 5But after thy hardness and impenitent heart treasurest up unto thyself wrath against the day of wrath and revelation of the righteous judgment of God; 6Who will render to every man according to his deeds:


SERVANT BEATING

We servants of Jesus shall all give account to our master himself..We shall receive according to our works, and we should strive to serve the Lord with all our hearts...Its is the Holy Spirits job to conform us to the image of Jesus, not another "hireling"..It is the Lords desire that we continue to allow ourselves to be conformed to His image..But with some it seems they think its their job to set evryone else but themselves straight all in the name of LOVE..

Romans 14:7For none of us liveth to himself, and no man dieth to himself. 8For whether we live, we live unto the Lord; and whether we die, we die unto the Lord: whether we live therefore, or die, we are the Lord’s. 9For to this end Christ both died, and rose, and revived, that he might be Lord both of the dead and living. 10But why dost thou judge thy brother? or why dost thou set at nought thy brother? for we shall all stand before the judgment seat of Christ. 11For it is written, As I live, saith the Lord, every knee shall bow to me, and every tongue shall confess to God. 12So then every one of us shall give account of himself to God. 13Let us not therefore judge one another any more: but judge this rather, that no man put a stumblingblock or an occasion to fall in his brother’s way.

BREASTBEATING

When pride and hardness has taken hold of a man his whole outlook towards others is one of superior thinking, superior acting, superior knowledge, etc..His whole being becomes a god unto himself..Hes more righteous than others, and therefore has the right to judge others, as well as correct them, for he is above rebuke and accountability..In the following story we see a pharisee pridefully looking down his nose at the publican..He was BROWBEATING him in his heart, and breastbeating in public...The publican though new his own needs, and knew he had plenty enough to concentrate on just keeping himself pure...

Luke 18:10Two men went up into the temple to pray; the one a Pharisee, and the other a publican. 11The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, God, I thank thee, that I am not as other men are, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this publican. 12I fast twice in the week, I give tithes of all that I possess. 13And the publican, standing afar off, would not lift up so much as his eyes unto heaven, but smote upon his breast, saying, God be merciful to me a sinner. 14I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other: for every one that exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted.

 

[brokenandhumbled]

Ive been here a long time. Been through many battles/debates/strife, etc..Alot of my issues were based on righteous indignation. However, that doesnt give me the right to pass judgement on Gods children. I apologize to anyone Ive offended and humbly ask your forgiveness..

I was very loving when I started my online fellowship years ago on another board on AOL...Soon I was involved in "defending the faith" from people who were espousing false doctrine..These were oneness Pentecostals from UPC who had no problem declaring that if you weren't baptized in Jesus name only you weren't saved. If you didn't speak in tongues you weren't saved, etc, etc.

After two years I had posted some 35,000 posts, was weary and had become unloving in my dealings with others. At the time I had met another person whom I became friends with. A very knowledgeable person. I learned much from him, however I also picked up some bad traits as well. One of those traits was deciding who was saved and who wasn't by looking at their beliefs and posts. Even to the point of deciding who was apostate and who had become tares in the church..I also gained a dangerous trait of thinking to highly of myself during this friendship..This friend also had extra biblical visions based on his beliefs garnered from extra biblical writings..Some things I began to believe somewhat, and some things I just put on a shelf with the attitude "we'll see".

The most dangerous thing from this relationship though was the loss of genuine love for others even if they didn't agree with us.. I had learned from this friend that to disagree with us was to disagree with God...A very dangerous thing to think to say the least, and extremely prideful on our part. My thoughts towards other began to be very pessimistic, and fellowship with others in the body became next to impossible. I allowed this relationship to influence me and disrupt who God desired for me to be..It was all my fault and no blame can be put anywhere else but upon me. ( Matthew 24:4)

It has surely been a struggle at times to shake the demonic influence that came from those years. At times I find myself going backwards again and acting as I did then...Please forgive me..Some of you were here long ago, and Im sure you remember what Im speaking of...

There's no time left for this constant bickering that goes on here...It poisons our spirits and keeps us from fulfilling the commandment to love others as ourselves...We all shall be held accountable for what we believe and how we acted upon those beliefs..If God respected us enough to give us free will to choose/believe Him or not, we need to afford the same grace towards others as well..

God bless you all as you strive to hear Him, follow Him, and serve Him!

Brother you have no idea how this whole thread has encouraged me and blessed my heart. I was moved to tears by your words. I am so thankful to the Lord for the things you have said and so encouraged at how He has spoken to you.

I remember many of the things that went on and for that reason pulled away from all the forums. It tore me in two and caused such confusion that at times it literally hurt. When I tried to reconcile I was further confusion and for this reason drew away. It was a great grief to me because some of those people helped me through so much in ways I cannot describe.

At one point, because I could not reconcile what was being said I seriously thought I was hearing from the devil and not God. In fact I was told that I was. I cant describe how that threw me into despair thinking I had grieved God and I began to doubt my salvation. I stumbled greatly thinking I was deceived and deceiving because these men spoke as of God. Their words seemed to have an authority about them but deep down I knew that there was something not quite right that did not sit well in my spirit. I was unsure of some of the extra biblical teachings but because these were learned men, I submitted to their "teaching". I grew more confused but was afraid to ask in case I was actually seen as divisive because I could not understand or agree. I believed them but I did not seek God ....and that was my mistake. I have since learned that the Word of God is the ONLY authority I can trust. If it does not agree with the Word, and does not sit well within my spirit, I reject it. If I am unsure, I pray about it and the Father always answers and gives understanding. I have learned it is safest to be like a Berean and search the scriptures daily to see if it is so. It has taken two years to undo and unlearn and it has surely knocked my confidence but It is a good thing because I have learned a good lesson.... to fix my eyes on Jesus and to check "it" by the Word.

I am so thankful to the Lord for you Brother. I cannot tell you how moved I was to read your words.

I think He has been doing a deep work in us all. I know that I am not the same person I was in those days. I was impulsive and judgemental but bit by bit through His rod and mercy He is helping me to see that things are just not as black and white as I assumed in those days. I miss many of those we once fellowshipped with and still pray for God to lead and guide them. I am now cautious of any I discern as raising themselves up as leaders and as you say we must remember that there is ONLY ONE we can trust who will guide us home.

I praise Him for the grace and mercy He has shown us and I pray for you Brother that you will know His loving hand each and every day. I pray that each day you will grow more and more into His likeness and may you truly know how high, how deep and how wide is the love of God. May He keep His hand of protection firmly upon you and may He defend you from EVERY fiery dart of the enemy. Thank you Jesus for our brother and praise you for the work that you are doing in His life.

Thankyou Brother for your openess and your obedience to our God. pray that he will bless you for it and may your sould prosper under his care.
God bless you Brother
We love you